Brief note before we start: last July we got together and worked out a second class to be inducted into the Smaddies Baddies BMT Hall of Fame. It has been nearly seven years since we started BMT and the films we had seen more than five years ago, in some cases, deserved a rewatch and reassessment. This is the last installment leading up to the fifth (seventh?) Smaddies Baddies bringing you previews and Hall of Fame Speeches for the five films chosen. We close with the Lindsay Lohan redemption story (er … strike that, this turned out to be the final nail in the coffin … whoops!) I Know Who Killed Me. The intention is to reminisce a bit about what we remember about the film, what we think of it now, and why it deserved a special place in BMT history. Enjoy!
Hall of Fame Induction Speech for I Know Who Killed Me
If there is one thing the Bad Movie Twins love it is twin films. A classic in its own right this serial killer thriller was meant to be a redemption story for its star Lindsay Lohan, an actress who, at the time, was haunted by stories of outrageous behavior and drug use. Instead, the exploitative film turned out to be the last thing studios needed to see to confirm Lohan’s career was, for all intents and purposes, dead. The Bad Movie Twins pride ourselves in finding the wonderful badmovieness in even the most non-thrilling of thrillers, but sometimes you have to recognize greatness. This is a bad movie fan’s bad movie, the kind you just marvel at, so consider its induction more of a victory lap if anything.
As was the case with all of the Hall of Fame movies it has been over five years since we saw the film, so what did I remember?
- The ultimate twin film! That’s right, Lindsay Lohan plays two girls who are, in fact, stigmata twins. She answers the age old question “if I hurt your twin do you feel it?” with a resounding YES.
- The entire film is colored blue and red. It is quite in your face, which is basically because the director was not very experienced.
- The killer is super telegraphed. Like it is obviously her piano teacher, he cuts off her hand and leg … which she is using to play the piano earlier in the film.
- Yet another Neal McDonough film! He is just a jewel, savor him, he only has so many movies left to watch.
- ROBOT ARM AND ROBOT LEG. That’s right, in the film Lohan almost inexplicably receives a futuristic robot arm and robot leg. You may wonder: wait? When does this movie take place? The near future I guess. It never quits, and it is almost entirely for budgetary purposes and it is awesome.
As usual I tried to keep the first and last entries as the most important. The twin film aspect of it is legendary. At the time we watched this we didn’t really have an idea of Twin Films or even that we were the Bad Movie Twins. We just had Bad Movie Thursday. We didn’t even have an email let alone a full-blown website. The stigmata twin aspect of the film is probably foundational to identifying elements of films that we couldn’t help but love. Black Eyed Peas, the Calendar, the Smellements, possibly all ultimately came from us personally identifying with twin films and trying to recapture that moment of just loving something in a profoundly illogical way.
The robot arm and robot leg on the other hand is completely unparalleled in bad movie lore. There is no other set piece in a bad movie that is as delightful as this (definitely budgetary) choice to give Lohan a robot arm and leg to drag around after getting them stigmatically removed by her sister’s torturer. They have to be plugged in and thus slow her down at times, it allows her to have a kind of super strength in other instances, and best of all it sets the film in some near future where this stuff not only exists, but is accessible to a high school student. For all I know it does exist! It leaves so many more questions than answers it kind of saves the middle of a film from being just boring as Lohan tries and figure out why she is hanging with this family she doesn’t know.
So how did the rewatch go? As you can kind of tell by my excitement above, it obviously went super well. Is the movie a bit slow at times? Yes. Is it gross and exploitative and make you feel terrible? It does! I actually did forget about that bit. The idea that this was supposed to allow Lohan back into the limelight by having her strip and show her “adult” side is just so misguided considering her main issue at the time was drugs and alcohol. But overall the film has to be the worst major serial killer film you can watch. As a plus you get to hang out with Lohan and McDonough in the slow bits, so it is still pretty fun even when it is a run-of-the-mill mystery thriller.
And there were some great bits I totally forgot about. Just how gross the film is is hard to describe. It is fully in the body horror genre at times, which is possibly my least favorite genre (maybe torture porn, but who can choose?). And there is an aspect of the direction I also forgot about: the mirror shot. We’ve watched a few films which use this conceit. Torque I think used mirror shots somewhat ironically, and Color of Night very earnestly. This is closer to Color of Night and kind of shows that the director just wasn’t really ready for a major motion picture, he was using directorial stylings from early-90s erotic thrillers. Might as well have shown us some Bruce Willis dong while you’re at it.
This film is the quintessential twin film and the quintessential bonkers set piece film. For the twin film aspect and the robot arm and robot leg the movie would easily slide head first into the Hall of Fame. But add that mirror shot directorial choice and it solidifies its place as the top of the serial killer bad movie genre. Congrats I Know Who Killed Me, you did it.