Oh man, so I was roller skating along the beach and saw this mural of a bunch of ladies. And I got all excited and smashed right into the wall thinking I could enter the glorious world of those ladies. Instead I got a massive concussion and now don’t remember a thing. Do you remember what happened in Xanadu?
Pop Quiz Hot Shot!
1) Where does Michael Beck first see the magical dreamgirl Olivia Newton-John?
2) Where does Michael meet the wizened (and very rich) Gene Kelly, and what is his connection to music?
3) The club, which is to be called Xanadu, has competing visions manifest as a battle of imaginary bandstands. What are the two visions?
4) In a very weird animated sequence our two protagonists become two different animals, which?
5) Who is Olivia Newton John really?
Bonus Question: How long did Xanadu stay open?
1) Olivia Newton-John was magicked into being via some tossed out paper by Michael. He later sees her for the first time while pensively walking by the ocean, she bumps into him and then kisses him before rollerskating off.
2) Michael randomly sees Gene Kelly playing the clarinet by the ocean and is like “wow, old man, you’re jamming on that clarinet, let’s be best friends!” Kelly was a clarinetist in an army band, and then started his own club. After heartache, Kelly left the biz, got rich, and misses it every day. He’s looking for a new club … and that’s the plot of the movie.
3) Well, the first, by Kelly, is obviously a 40s era bandstand complete with zoot suits and dancing people in uniform. The second, by Michael Beck, is that of a real classic 80s rock band, complete with matching orange jumpsuits for the like … 70 people involved in this insane endeavor.
4) Well, they first become a pair of fish, and then a pair of birds. And for any big fan of BMT you must know we love one thing in animated films … and that is the truly bizarre world of sexy animals. And animal Olivia Newton John (complete with leg warmers and ponytail) makes one sexy fish and bird.
5) She’s a muse. Not joking, she straight up says she’s Terpsichore (the muse of dance and chorus). That was the mural at the beginning of the film, the nine muses of Greek mythology.
Bonus Answer: For a few years. It did fine, although once they realized that everyone in the club had to roller skate around at the beginning everyone just started showing up late, and so they nixed the opening number. They then temporarily switched to a line dance cowboy bar because that was the most popular theme for the club, and later switched to a Miami-esque dance club that mostly specialized in selling cocaine. And oh boy, did they sell a lot of cocaine. Michael wasn’t there though, he smashed into the muse mural in real life and shattered both his arms and got a severe concussion on opening night. He made a boatload as a partner in the venture though, and ultimately went one to be a fairly successful painter. Gene Kelly left him all his money in his will, so he retired in his 40s and now lives in San Diego.
Right, that makes sense. Well … the cocaine part of it makes sense. The rest of the movie sounds like nonsense.