Oh man, so I just woke up from a coma and I need to take down the guy who put me into it … one second, I need to go through years of physical therapy to heal my atrophied body. Also I can’t remember a thing. Do you remember what happened in Hard to Kill?
Pop Quiz Hot Shot!
1) In the beginning of the film Seagal catches a criminal conspiring with a city assemblyman to commit a crime. What crime were they planning on committing? And why didn’t Seagal get them arrested?
2) How long was Seagal in a coma? And where does he hide out while getting into shape?
3) How did Seagal’s old buddy O’Malley find him in the end?
4) How was Seagal’s hideout discovered?
5) Before their plans were waylaid, what was the plan for Seagal and his son to get away?
Bonus Question: How long does Mason and Andy’s relationship last after the events of the film?
Answers
1) MURDER. A murder most foul for sure. They are setting up a hit, but Seagal doesn’t know who the big bad guy is at that point since they were shrouded in darkness. And ultimately Seagal is betrayed by other officers which allows the bad guys to come and put him into a seven year coma. Whoops!
2) A gimme. He was obviously in a coma for seven years, until a benevolent nurse put a cat on his head and he awoke ready to kick some ass. But first, he has to fuck up some trees on the property of a doctor who is in China for six months for research. The nurse is house sitting for him and no one knows she is there! Perfecto.
3) Ah, so Seagal knew that O’Malley’s mother was in a retirement community in Venice Beach. So his lady friend went over. And then when she left the number, the mother turned it over to her son who traced it to the doctor’s house. Et voila, Seagal has an ally!
4) Well, the bad guy knew that one or both of the nurses in the coma ward was helping Seagal, so they camped people on both of their apartments. They killed the other one, and then when the one that was actually helping Seagal came around they followed her back to the doctor’s house. Boom!
5) His son was going to get on a train to Albuquerque with the tape. Seagal, meanwhile, was going to retrieve the video tape and pass it off to the local news (as promised earlier in the film). Then Seagal was going to follow, but if he was captured beforehand then O’Malley was going to go in his stead. Once there they would wait for the Senator to get arrested, etc. But things go awry, and Seagal has to go above the law to capture the Senator himself.
Bonus Answer: Having fully recovered from his seven year coma, Mason is back on the force! And with that comes long nights, champagne, and love. Making up for lost time, Mason and Andy have a child, get married, and settle down, her a homemaker as the complete destruction of her doctor friend’s house leaves her out of a job. But, it is a tale as old as time. Their love, as pure and unspoilt as the great loves of western literature, is no match for the seven year itch. She leaves Mason and gets with, you guessed it, the never-seen doctor from seven years before! Now that’s a meetcute. “Our marriage was a seven year coma, Mason.” Her words cut deep. But Captain Storm has to bust heads on the streets of LA. He doesn’t have time to cry. Smash cut to Hard to Kill 2: Storm Warning.
It would actually be the third in the series, the second would be the Revolutionary Road-esque hard drama just about his general discontent with his second marriage and how it slowly dissolves.
Bad Movie Twins 