Oh man, so get this! I was driving along a mountain road minding my own business, when all of a sudden I drove off the edge and got all smashed up! Now I have animal parts in me and a concussion to boot. I can’t remember a thing. Do you remember what happened in The Animal?
Pop Quiz Hot Shot!
1) Rob Schneider really really wants to be a police officer. What is the one thing he needs to do to be a real deal cop?
2) Aw shucks, that’s too bad. Well, while everyone else is at the company softball game, he’s gets to play cop and respond to a robbery call. But instead he gets into a massive accident. Why does he get into the accident?
3) Around this time he also meets his lady love. She’s kind of a big deal, a local celeb of sorts. What made her so famous?
4) In the end he does become a cop (hooray!). What does he do which gets him elevated to this position?
5) And prior to revealing that his lady love is in fact a Femanimal, who are the three people they head-fake out of people the Animal? And why is she ultimately let free for them to both me Manimals together?
Bonus Question: It’s twenty years in the making! We are revisiting The Animal (finally!). What is the whole fam up to?
Answers
1) He needs to pass that physical exam. Oh, what’s this? Good thing he only has to not get dead last. One problem: he sucks. John C. McGinley is there to basically yell at him and say “get good” when he fails. But here’s the thing: he does suck, and he probably shouldn’t be a cop.
2) There was a seal in the middle of the road? You could be forgiven a bit for missing it, but that is the reason, and partially you are supposed to wonder whether the mad scientist wrecked him on purpose … well, no matter, he wrecks and now a boatload of animal parts are going in him.
3) She stayed in a tree for a while to protest deforestation. I suppose it must have worked, otherwise it wouldn’t have been very effective and she wouldn’t be famous. But that is why, she was the tree lady who was on the news every day.
4) He saves the … mayor’s son? I think it was the mayor. The son goes off to play and using his dog ears Schnieder hears his distress and then using his dolphin abilities he flies into the water and saves him … I’m not joking, how wasn’t this a procedural crime show again? It is a very late-80s syndicated TV style.
5) So three people are kind of offered up as the manimal. Is it Schnieder’s cop friend who is suddenly feeling very hungry? Is it the mad doctor with the animal-like deformed foot? Or is it the sinister chief of police who is suspicious of why people are in the forest? Nope, its the love interest obviously. But don’t worry, Schnieder’s other friend claims to be the manimal and everyone leaves because there is no way they are going to kill / whatever they were planning to do to a black manimal. No way no how.
Bonus Answer: Not only is all of Rob Schnieder’s children police officers, they ARE the entire police department. And the town has never been better! They manimal around going all fast and swimming and junk, and crime is at an all time low. But ho! What’s this? The secret service? That’s right, there have been threats against the President himself, and these threats are … odd. They speak of a new order, hybrid manimals, and seeing as their family have the only registered manimals in the U.S. Manimal Database, that means it is either them, or there is a new threat in Manimal science! Well, needless to say, the family wants to clear there name. They obviously have to go back to their old friend Dr. Wilder who, sure, won the Nobel Prize in Manimal Sciences long ago, but since the ban he knows they can be the only ones left … unless. And indeed, it turns out there is another manimal … The President himself! It’s an inside job to get the plight of the manimals into the public eye and to allow Manimal Science to progress again. And you know what (the Supreme Court says) you are right. Manimalism is a protected class! Manimals should be able to run free! And everyone lived happily ever after.
It is called The Animal 2: First Animal, and sure, they become the entire presidential secret service detail at the end.
Bad Movie Twins 