Jamie
This cycle is great because it allows me to just look back in the New York Times listings and really get a feel for the time when a film like High School High was on television (September 1st, 1999). You’d probably think High School High was some afternoon affair, but no. It was on primetime on Fox going against The Man Without a Face (spoiler alert, he actually has a face). This is probably because early September is rerun time, so gotta get your ratings from a Jon Lovitz laughfest. If I had to highlight one other film it would be The Escape starring Patrick Dempsey. Still about 3 years from Sweet Home Alabama the film is probably the nadir of Dempsey’s career. I’m more interested in the fact that everywhere you look for a synopsis of the film you find essentially the same, boring thing: wrongfully convicted man escapes prison after 10 years of misery. Not NYTimes, though, no. “A prison security chief pursues a convict that escaped with hopes of opening a jazz nightclub.” No mention of wrongful conviction there… but gotta make sure the jazz nightclub makes the cut. Amazing.
To recap, Dick Clark (ha!) is a rich boy fed up with the silver spoon he was born with. He wants to test his novel teaching ideas (basically, “try”) outside of the private school his father runs. When he shows up at Marion Barry High School, though, he is shocked to find the conditions are horrible, the kids don’t listen, and there is an ongoing drug war. But no matter, Dick uses his plucky go-getter attitude to dive into the midst of it all. He identifies Griff as an underachiever and once he’s on board (and aspiring to college) the rest of the class follows suit. Dick even starts a relationship with his fellow teacher, Victoria. Things are looking up! But the drug gang and their mysterious crime boss, Mr. A, are having none of it and tamper with the students’ test scores. After everyone fails the students give up and Dick is fired. Griff, now disillusioned with school, joins the gang to sell drugs. When Victoria and Dick find out that the tests were messed with they rush to Griff’s rescue. They find out Mr. A is none other than the eeevil principal of the school (what a twist!) and a fight ensues. Once that’s wrapped up they get everything corrected, Dick becomes principal, the students head off the college, and Dick and Victoria smooch a bunch probably. THE END.
If that sounded like a rather sweet and serious film rather than a spoof of the sweet and serious films it’s meant to be mocking you aren’t wrong. High School High certainly starts out with a bunch of jokes. Mostly they are somewhat clever visual gags, which are part of why I have a vague recollection of liking the film when I saw it as a kid. The weird thing is that once we get into the meat of the plot it veers into something that is largely indistinguishable from something like Dangerous Minds. The mistake is that Lovitz’s character is just too sweet and good natured. Ultimately he has a happy ending because he’s on the right side of everything. He’s not even a buffoon or nothing. Just a good guy. I would think the real spoof of the genre would be to turn the ‘white savior’ trope upside down and make the guy kind of dopey, so dopey in fact that the students realize that if a buffoon like that can become a teacher then they definitely can too. Not the case, though. Fortunately it’s not nearly as offensive as it could be… in fact I think the poster is the most offensive aspect when compared to anything actually in the film. As for Soldier Boyz, hooooooooo doggy. Now that’s a Bring a Friend. That film is wild. It’s about how Michael Dudikoff is tasked with rescuing a woman from a rebel group in Southeast Asia and insists on taking a bunch of juvenile delinquents along with a promise of freedom for any who survive. That… that’s simply deranged. The whole film is deranged. I can’t believe it exists. If you are looking for something real dumbo to watch then check out this one. It’s a gem.
Hot Take Clam Bake! You know what guys? I’m going to go out on a limb and say that Jon Lovitz and Tia Carrere… not gonna make it. I know, I know. Hard to believe, but it’s true. The real issue that will come up is that Lovitz just cares too much (which is also, coincidentally, my biggest flaw). So he’s gonna be looking around and thinking “if it worked here, it can work anywhere,” and that’s a slippery slope to “if it worked here, it can work EVERYWHERE.” If you’re trying to make something work everywhere you just don’t have time for your lady love. Soon she must say goodbye and find love with someone who can give her the love and attention she needs. Alas… alas. Hot Take Temperature: Jon Lovitz.
Patrick?
Patrick
‘Ello everyone! Wait a minute … are we talking about Jon Lovitz in the leading role of an over-the-hill Zucker spoof-that-seems-more-earnest-than-a-spoof? Let’s go!
This film seems how-you-say … racist? But I’ll let film scholars debate the merits of High School High’s commentary on the public school system and race via spoof.
And yeah, this movie has a plot so similar to prior BMT film Dangerous Minds that it makes you wonder by the end whether they got cold feet and made it earnest on purpose or what. Because the back third of this film is kind of just a film about Lovitz getting through to these kids and teaching them the value of an honest education.
The beginning is decently funny. Some funny gags and they do an okay job with making the school ludicrous. The back half of the film on the other hand … well, we already went into the earnest part, but the real crime is the film just completely stops being funny once it needs to have a little heart at all.
I should mention that I’ve seen this film a few times. It was on Comedy Central quite a lot when we were growing up. I don’t remember it being funny then though. So I guess it isn’t quite an Ace Ventura scenario in that sense.
This was well and truly the last gasp of Zucker as well. He would write Baseketball (but that isn’t a spoof really), and then start working on G.O.P. ad campaigns a few years later and that was all she wrote.
Now as for our Friend this week Soldier Boyz, hoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo doggy (to borrow a phrase from Jamie, but mine is better because it was longer). Uh … this movie is how-you-say … racist? Was there something wrong with us in the 90s … you know what, this is a larger conversation we don’t need to get into, focus. This movie is insane. Imagine a film where the actual message is “how do I get through to these literally murderer teenagers … I got it! Take them on a life-or-death mission to Vietnam and have them pretend to be soldiers (boyz) to win a ticket to freedom! We did it, gang!” It might just be the craziest idea I’ve ever seen. It is ludicrous. All the people (including Dudikoff) are bad people. But yet I can’t look away, there is just something so bizarrely 90s about it. A- I think. Just some of the best-worst acting and off the hook plotting for an action film ever. A must for all those dudikated Dudikoff-heads out there.
Let’s see. Product Placement (What?) for the 1959 Chevrolet Corvette C1, don’t even ask, I’m counting it. Setting as a Character (Where?) for California obviously. And Worst Twist (How?) as well for the inevitable reveal that Louise Fletcher was the bad guy all along. Amazing, her first ever role as an evil person. Anyways, this is a Good film, like kind of funny at times, Lovitz is quite charming, it is fine for a 90s spoof, just not very funny, just kinda.
Read all about the sequel to High School High in the Quiz. Cheerios,
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