Pixels Preview

Alright, so this week we moved on to one of the most anticipated BMTs of the year. It stars a BMT favorite in the lead role and will almost certainly be nominated in several Razzie categories (not that we respect the Razzies in any way, we’re just trying desperately to bring some legitimacy to an otherwise illegitimate award voting process). That’s right! We’re watching Pixels starring Adam Sandler! Avert your eyes. This might get ugly. Let’s go!

Pixels (2015) – BMeTric 37.9 (February 24, 2016)


(Editor’s Note: Generated on February 24, 2016.The BMeTric trajectory and result is about what I would expect, pretty smooth, between 30 and 40. Above average bad movie, but probably too good all things considered. I expect it’ll stay around there).

RogerEbert.com – 1.5 stars – Oh, “Pixels” does have a couple of laughs scattered here and there, and the film as a whole is certainly better than such recent Sandler disasters as “That’s My Boy,” “Blended” and the truly inexplicable “The Cobbler,” but when one considers how good this material might have been if placed in the right hands, to see it squandered this way makes it almost more painful to view than the typical Sandler stinker.

(Funny that they specifically bring up The Cobbler. Both me and Patrick found the film mediocre and generally harmless. Basically seemed like people came in expecting something great because of the director and were appalled to find that it didn’t live up to that. Sounds like the same thing happened here. Gave Pixels a bad review just because the film didn’t live up to some preconceived lofty expectations. Maybe we’ll like it then… or at least not hate it. I didn’t hate The Cobbler after all. It was just blah with a bad ending.)

Trailer – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=diqZBS-RTAw

(I find it interesting to note how little of the plot you actually get from the trailer. Like… what do you actually know? There are video game aliens attacking and several people (Who? We don’t know) are tasked with defeating them. Why just them? Well, apparently they are the “only ones who can defeat them.” Oh… huh… why?)

Director(s) – Chris Columbus – (Known For: Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets; Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone; Home Alone; Mrs. Doubtfire; Stepmom; Rent; Adventures in Babysitting; Percy Jackson & the Olympians: The Lightning Thief. BMT: Home Alone 2: Lost in New York; Bicentennial Man; Pixels; Nine Months; I Love You Beth Cooper. Notes: Born in Spangler, PA which is only 25 miles from Indiana, PA where we were born.)

Writer(s) – Tim Herlihy (screenplay, screen story) – (Known For: Big Daddy; Happy Gilmore; The Wedding Singer; Billy Madison. BMT: Just Go with It; The Waterboy; Mr. Deeds; Grown Ups 2; Little Nicky; Bedtime Stories; Pixels. Notes: Nominated for Worst Screenplay, Grown Ups 2 (2013), Little Nicky (2000), Big Daddy (1999). Could this year spell his first win?)

Timothy Dowling (screenplay) – (Known For: Role Models. BMT: Just Go with It; This Means War; Pixels. Notes: Brought in for the major rewrite of the film that took it from a more traditional Happy Madison production to a bigger, tentpole type film in the vein of Ghostbusters… or at least that’s what Variety told me.)

Patrick Jean also gets an official writing credit as the creator of the short film that it’s based on.

Actors – Adam Sandler – (Known For: 50 First Dates; Anger Management; Big Daddy; Happy Gilmore; Hotel Transylvania; The Wedding Singer; Punch-Drunk Love; Billy Madison; Funny People; Reign Over Me; Spanglish; Hotel Transylvania 2. BMT: Click; Grown Ups; Just Go with It; The Longest Yard; I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry; The Waterboy; Mr. Deeds; Grown Ups 2; Little Nicky; Blended; Bedtime Stories; That’s My Boy; Jack and Jill; Pixels; The Cobbler; Bulletproof; Airheads; Zookeeper; You Don’t Mess With the Zohan; Men Women & Children; Adam Sandler’s Eight Crazy Nights. Notes: Nominated for Worst Actor, Blended (2014), Grown Ups 2 (2013), I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry (2007), Eight Crazy Nights/Mr. Deeds (2002), Little Nicky (2000), The Waterboy (1998), Bulletproof/Happy Gilmore (1996); Won for Worst Actor, That’s My Boy (2012), Jack and Jill/Just Go with It (2011), Big Daddy (1999); Won for Worst Actress, Jack and Jill (2011). BMT hall-of-famer.)

Also stars Peter Dinklage and Kevin James.

Budget/Gross: $88 million / $78,604,981 ($237,104,981 Worldwide)

(Per usual nothing can touch Sandler. You think this is a failure? Have you seen the box office grosses for real failures? Ever heard of a film called Pan? Now that’s a failure. This film essentially mimics the gross of the last Die Hard film which by all accounts was a decent performer for its studio. Everything about the articles being written about the demise of Sandler was bunk. He will never go away! He will always win! Even when he doesn’t win, he fucking wins.)

Rotten Tomatoes: 17% (27/155), Critics Consensus: Much like the worst arcade games from the era that inspired it, Pixels has little replay value and is hardly worth a quarter.

(Ugh, RT and your puns. You should be embarrassed. You just stretched this one out and it’s horrible. First of all, “replay value”? That doesn’t even really pertain to films. “Hardly worth a quarter”? What is this phrase? God you are terrible. Also a bit surprising that it got slightly better reviews than The Last Witch Hunter given the number of articles devoted to poking fun at Sandler about it.)

Poster – Pretty Pixelly Poster (A)


(I have to hand it to them… it’s a very pretty poster. Simple, bright colors, and just looks pretty. I like it a lot.)

Tagline(s) – Play for the Planet (B-)

Game on (B)

(Both of these were used on official posters. There may have even been a third, but I just used these. Both are not great, but not as bad as you might think at first glance. The first one has some alliteration. The second one has a nice double entendre. Both give ideas of the film. Just missing a level of cleverness that isn’t there. Surprisingly good though.)

Notes – This is the ninth film or television series in which Kevin James and Adam Sandler have appeared together.

Jennifer Aniston turned down the female lead role.

This film is based on a 2010 short film by French director Patrick Jean and distributed by One More Productions.

Fiona Shaw plays the British Prime Minister. This is the second time she has appeared in a video game related movie. She also played Lena in Super Mario Bros. (1993).

Contrary to many of his other films, Sean Bean survives the entire movie.

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