Oh man, so around Halloween I got this sweet pumpkin mask that definitely look like a big pile of shit, I loved it. But then this commercial came on, and my head turning into spiders and snakes and stuff! What a headache. Do you remember what happened in Halloween III: Season of the Witch?
Pop Quiz Hot Shot!
1) What are the three very special masks that Silver Shamrock is selling?
2) Our hero, Dan, meets a young lady, Ellie, in the course of his hospital rounds. How do they meet?
3) Well, it is time to investigate! So let’s head to Santa Mira and check into the local motel, The Rose of Shannon. Who else is staying in the lovely accommodations?
4) What do the Silver Shamrock masks do to their wearers?
5) During the course of the film how many people die?
Bonus Question: So what happened to all of the children and mask and stuff?
Answers
1) There is a skeleton, a pumpkin, and a witch. They are pretty sweet masks, for being mass produced. You would think you’d need more than three though, otherwise everyone will look the same …
2) Well, during his rounds Ellie’s father gets horrifically murdered by a representative of Silver Shamrock, who then subsequently immolates himself in the parking lot. Ellie, incredibly confused about the strange death, finds and ropes Dan into her investigation.
3) At the motel there is also a very loud family in a Winnebago (Buddy, his wife, and Buddy Jr.) from San Diego. Additionally there is a mask buyer who, annoyed because her order got screwed up, has to stay in the motel overnight while that gets sorted.
4) Well it depends … is it a misfire? We see a misfire and it seems to screw up the person’s face and a bug crawls out of their mouth and into their head (maybe?). Now how was it intended to work? Well … they brought over a piece of Stonehenge and they are putting particles of it (which contain an ancient Celtic power) into the masks. On Halloween they will show a commercial which will tell the children to put on their masks and power them up. At that point they will die and snakes and insects will explode from their corpses killing thousands … dark stuff.
5) Old man in the beginning. Drunk in the town. Woman who gets her face blown off. The kid who was the test subject, and definitely his father (although his mother might have survived). The morgue attendant Dan was macking on. And finally the big bad witch at the end who was blasted by Stonehenge. So far two of the bad guys (although they are robots) the guy who got crushed by the car and the guy who burned himself to death. The one Dan destroys while infiltrating the factory. And then probably a dozen in the factory on Halloween night. And finally robot Ellie … wait, was Ellie a robot the whole time? Did he have sex with a robot? No … I have to believe a real Ellie existed and they killed her and replaced her with a robot. So add that to the body count.
Bonus Answer: This was actually rather notable, that originally it is revealed he failed, and the novelization of the film suggests the same. But nay! He succeeded. He stopped the broadcast, saved the children, and led the authorities to the factory where the robots were discovered and the signal deconstructed to figure out its sinister power. But now, equipped with this power, there is only so long before it starts to potentially crop up around the globe. And guess what? There is only one man who can stop this weapon before it gets out of control. You guessed it! John Kruger, the Eraser himself! Using his faster than light railgun he explodes the bad guys and, due to the sheer energetic release of the weapon, reverses time a la Superman 1978, and erases the weapon from the timeline itself. Yessir, it is a backdoor sequel crossover. Halloween III-2: Season of the Eraser.
That is the point in time where I think people who really check out of the muddled timeline of the Halloween films. Even better would be if the after credits scene had Michael Myers show up. That’s right, Kruger’s next protective detail is Laurie Strode herself. It is Halloween III-3: Kruger vs. Myers: Not Freddy Krueger, John Kruger. That’s the name of that sequel.