Meet the Spartans Quiz

It is possible to remember things from a film like this? I guess we’ll find out. The quiz might as well be “tell me one thing spoofed in this film, I dare you” because I’m just about at a loss.

Pop Quiz Hot Shot!

  1. A long montage starts the film showing how our hero King Leonidas grew up to be a powerful Spartan warrior. When sent off to battle a great beast (a penguin), what food does Leonidas find and eat?
  2. Paris Hilton takes the place of the disfigured Ephialtes in the story. How does she say she got disfigured?
  3. Traitoro, played by Diedrich Bader, attempts to foil the Spartans by texting their plan to Xerxes. Ultimately how is he defeated?
  4. Near the beginning of the film there is a string of seven celebrity impressions as King Leonidas tosses people into the Giant Pit of Death in Sparta. Name as many as you can, one point each.
  5. When Method Man shows up as the Persian ambassador, the Spartans and Persians compete in dance competition spoofing what movie?


  1. A footlong subway sandwich. The second subway advertisement we’ve seen in a BMT film in less than a year (the other being the six foot party sub in The Beverly Hillbillies, also starring Diedrich Bader!).
  2. She claims she became disfigured from all the stress involved in her reckless driving arrest, which doesn’t make a lick of sense.
  3. Queen Margo reveals herself as evil Spiderman from Spiderman 3, and fights Traitoro who is kind of inexplicably Sandman, so he’s made of sand. She then dust busts him and his nefarious plot is revealed.
  4. The first one is Britney Spears, who gets tossed in along with Kevin Federline. After that it is the three American Idol judges (Simon Cowell, Paula Abdul, and Randy Jackson) along with a performer (Sanjaya) and Ryan Seacrest.
  5. Stomp the Yard, although I’ll accept Step Up since most of the late moves are much closer to the style demonstrated in those films.

Jamie, because he is a stone cold pile of garbage, aced the quiz. Are you as bad as he is, or do you still retain some shred of human dignity? Admit it … you got them all right didn’t you? You piece of garbage, you love it.


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