Oh man, so get this. I bought a decrepit old building which was haunted by a spooky ghost. Obviously, while I was throwing my huge rager in my borderline-condemned fire hazard of a building he popped out and just bopped me on the head! Now I can’t remember a thing. Do you remember what happened in Bones (2001)?
Pop Quiz Hot Shot!
1) In the beginning of the film some real jabronis come into the “bad part of town” to get something. What were they looking to buy (before getting killed by Bones)?
2) Bones can turn into an animal, what animal?
3) Why does Patrick buy the old decrepit building, what is his job and his friends/brothers jobs?
4) So … back in the 70s who killed Bones and why?
5) And who is Bones wreaking vengeance on when he returns (before being vanquished by Patrick and Pam Grier) and why?
Bonus Question: In a mid-credits scene Cynthia has a dream. Who does she dream of and what is she told?
Answers
1) They are looking to buy druuuuuuuuuugs. I think cocaine, but maybe crack, who knows? They do get the drugs, but little do they know it was all a ploy to steal their car anyways, so they were going to be screwed regardless. But they die anyways, because it was also a ploy to get them caught by the cops, and they accidentally run into the haunted house.
2) A doggie! A very cute doggie at that. Although the woman insists on feeding it giant chunks of raw meat … that isn’t really dog food. They need veggies and grains and stuff just like humans. But eventually she would have learned that because there is no way you’d buy expensive meat instead of just dog food.
3) He wants to party. Well, he wants to throw parties. Well, he wants to own a nightclub where his friend and brother can DJ because he’s their manager. It is a kind of odd idea. Are they famous enough that a decrepit building in a bad part of town could survive with them just DJing every single night? Seems like a nightmare.
4) The main person who killed bones was Eddie Mack although the crooked cop Lupovich was also threatening him as well. And ultimately the main reason was Jimmy Bones was freaking out after being forced to do crack cocaine by Eddie in retaliation for refusing to go into business with Eddie and Lupovich, instead deciding he was happy to continue with his lottery business.
5) He wants to primarily destroy Eddie and Lupovich, obviously, but also Shotgun and Jeremiah because they agreed to stab the dying Jimmy instead of refusing (like Pam Grier does).
Bonus Answer: Well, we know Cynthia has the blood of Jimmy Bones in her. The night after attacking Patrick, she has a dream in which her mother appears to tell her that while Jimmy Bones’ spirit has been trapped in the dark world under the city, he can still reach out through Cynthia and that no one is safe while this is possible. She theorizes this is because the living soul of Jeremiah was trapped in the dark city and the connection between his son (Patrick) and Cynthia allows Bones to continue to touch the living world. Traveling to the dark city, Patrick contends with Bones (and a gang of killers condemned to wander the dark city for eternity) to find Jeremiah who is trapped and being tortured by Jimmy. In a final battle Patrick forgives his father, but in a final act of redemption Jeremiah sacrifices himself and as a result escapes the dark city to enter the afterlife. Ejected from the dark city, Patrick and Cynthia can feel the connection broken and the world forever safe from the curse of Jimmy Bones.
It is called Bones: Dark City and no, there won’t be a trilogy, that puts a button on the series.
Bad Movie Twins 