Halloween: Resurrection Recap

Jamie

Wooooooaaahhhhh. Dog poo. It’s dog poo in our faces. The debate will forever be whether this is so dog poo that it’s a big time BMT hit? Or is it too dog poo (thanks for everything! Julie Newmar) and is just bad and should be burned to the ground? Patrick and I will probably debate this for hours because this is bar none the single worst horror film of any of the major franchises. It’s not even close.

I’m serious, this is a tragedy put to screen. I can’t believe they did this. I can’t believe they let it go out with Halloween as the title. Cut the beginning, reedit it so you never see Michael’s face and release it as a different movie. Anything but what they did here. My god, it is offensive. Patrick and I were driven to insanity because it is like Michael Myers himself was turned into a film. It is an unstoppable force. No one must watch this. Preserve your quaint view that Halloween 4-6 represented the nadir of the franchise. Such an innocent time. Oh I miss those Halloween 6 days. The days of the Cult of Thorn.

I’m not sure if I can even give a cursory recap of the film. I’m so shocked and awed by the traumatic event that I experienced while watching it, but I’ll give it a try. Even though we all saw Michael Myers die at the end of the H20 we are told not to believe our lying eyes. In fact Myers traded places with an incapacitated paramedic and that’s who Laurie Strode decapitated. Cool cool cool. Lucky for Laurie, Michael comes back and she is swiftly and mercifully killed before she is forced to participate in this film any further. Meanwhile a reality show is being produced that is gonna take a whole bunch of dumbos and leave them in the Myers house on Halloween. Sounds dumb and fake. It is. But also Michael Myers shows up and actually does kill a bunch of people. Our new Laurie Strode, Sara Moyer, is able to survive with the help of her internet boyfriend, a giant nerd alert high school freshman named Myles. In a final showdown she and Busta Rhymes join forces to take down Michael Myers and victory is theirs. Or is it? It’s not, Michael appears to survive, but this new series didn’t. Also, after the film ends Sara meets Myles and is extremely disappointed and basically is like “see yah, nerd.” That’s a fact.

Honestly some shocking stuff. D-double-O to the P-O-O. So let’s Hot Take Clam Bake and GTFO. Today my clam bake is that while the new series claims to eliminate the Halloween franchise after the second entry, I say nay. If you look closely at the beginning of H20, where Myers enters the recently deceased Dr. Loomis’ house to find info on Laurie, you’ll see a newspaper clipping claiming that Laurie died in the car accident. This was the ruse she used to escape her past life and prevent Michael from finding her. But wait, was that not also the explanation we got for why Laurie wasn’t in entries 4-6? Indeed. We also see Loomis tracking Myers and his whereabouts, so doesn’t it reason to believe that he in fact would appear like a super crazy ghost in the Haddonfield on occasion terrorizing the local townfolk claiming Michael was back. My theory? Entries 4-6 are the delusions of the mad man himself. He imagined those events. So no, the sequels aren’t skipped. They actually hold the key to Loomis’ deranged mind and must be studied extensively. Thank you.

That’s what we in the biz call a Raging Inferno of a hot take. Patrick?

Patrick

‘Ello everyone! Halloween: Resurrection? More like Dog Poo Straight In My Face: Resurrection! How dare you. How daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaare you. Let’s get into it!

  • My god, what have they done to my boy! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE!
  • A slap in the face to fans! Dog poo shoved ever so slowly into my face! This film is an abomination. It has dead eyes, dark like coals. I looked into its eyes and knew it survived through pure unfeeling evil. I must warn the sheriff! The Cult of Thorn made this film to control an ancient magic! Why won’t anyone listen to me?!
  • Is this movie a joke? It feels like it is a joke, but one that no one is really in on. Like they made a garbage film, all looked at each other and were like “uh oh … put some jokes in there and change the ending, maybe people will think we weren’t serious.” This is the era of Jason X so it isn’t totally implausible.
  • This film is a direct-to-video film called like Murder.com or something that somehow contains Michael Myers. Half of the film is shot on webcams (like legit webcams), and the other half is reaction shots of teenagers at a costume party. It has no connection to any Halloween film that has come before or after. Completely perplexing nonsense.
  • I just don’t know how something like this happens. Further I have no idea how Halloween as a franchise survived Resurrection. Jason X is a joke (and Jason in general was at that point anyways) so that didn’t affect that franchise. But this is unforgivable. No wonder they did a remake of the original and then a direct sequel to the first film eventually. The sixth film can be somewhat forgiven and forgotten. Resurrection is forever. Tainting that bloodline forever.
  • I think I’m going insane.
  • I think I’ll just leave it with that to some degree with one serious warning: do not watch this film on its merits or in connection to Halloween at all. Watch this, if you must, as a perplexing touchstone in the history of slashers. The early 2000s was when slashers died, and I dare say I think Halloween: Resurrection may have been the final nail in the coffin.
  • The usual Setting as a Character (Where?) for Haddonfield (made explicit via Haddonfield College). And also the usual A+ Holiday Film (When?) for Halloween. A decent Production Placement (What?) for Pepsi which is prominently displayed on several occasions early in the film. This is either the worst film ever or the most BMT film ever, and I think it is the most BMT film ever, an abomination!
  • And you best belieb there are special features on the DVD I got (from the brary natch). There was a lame deleted scene showing more of the in-movie interview about the reality show characters (D). There was a weird little movie about how awesome Jamie Lee Curtis is (A because Curtis is awesome, but F because she lied and said she thought the movie was good). There was literally all of the headcam footage (F because it is 40 minutes long, looks like shit, and ain’t no one got time for that). There was a storyboard (B, kind of cool to see the motivation for the headcams). And there was a set tour (A, really cool to see very extensively how they built the house). And finally an audio commentary (D, not interesting and mostly you learn the same stuff as in the other special features. Solo audio commentaries are never good.). Phew!

Check out to my sequel to this film, Halloween: Exorcism, in the Quiz. Cheerios,

The Sklogs

Halloween: Resurrection Quiz

Oh man, so I was facing off with Michael Myers … again … for like the eighth time. And wouldn’t you know it, but I slipped on some blood, and bopped my noggin. Now I can’t remember a thing. Do you remember what happened in Halloween: Resurrection?

Pop Quiz Hot Shot!

1) Wait a tick, I seem to remember Laurie Strode decapitating her brother in the last film. How exactly do they go about explaining that little problem in Resurrection?

2) And now Laurie Strode is dead yo! But people still don’t quite think Michael is back jack. Why?

3) Six people spend the night in the Myers house. That’s a mistake. Why do they do it? Not like … what are their motivations (which are specific to each one), like literally what are they getting in return?

4) Throughout the film we get to see the thrilling scenes of … a bunch of people watching the webcam footage of the film at a Halloween costume party. What is the character who is leading the watch party dressed as?

5) Out of the original six people and the rest of the Dangertainment crew how many people survive the house of horror?

Bonus Question: In the mid-credits scene we smash cut to a year later where we see a For Sale sign being removed from the Myers house. Who bought it?

Answers

Halloween: Resurrection Preview

Jamie and Patrick aren’t just surviving the game, they are thriving the game. Using their elite speed and beautiful minds, they outwit and outpace Future Mikey #1 at every turn. “Well that was easy,” Patrick says as they arrive at Future Mikey #2’s time machine with time to spare. FM2 wishes them safe travels. Mikey Myers, so thankful for their help fulfilling his destiny as a teen heartthrob, gifts them a golden microphone. Jamie and Patrick eye it curiously. Parsons and Ty even show up and give them a goodbye hug. “I wish I could come with you,” Ty says, “when you arrived I was so lost, ready to throw everything away in the name of art. You gave me… sniff… back… art.” He is sobbing and it’s very uncomfortable, so they are more than happy to tell him that it’s not him it’s them and he has to stay and help out or whatever. Just as they are about to board the time machine they hear a noise behind them. Around the corner jogs LePumice, huffing and puffing, sweat streaming down his face. “Oh right, we almost forgot…” but before Jamie can finish telling LePumice how forgettable he is, a bullet zings off the concrete above his left shoulder. FM1 is rounding the corner. A large neon sign of Mikey Myers’ face explodes as FM1 misses again to their right. Just as he sets his feet and readies another shot, Jamie, Patrick, and LePumice jump into the time machine. But before they can press the button for home, Ty jumps in too, bumping Patrick and sending the time machine into overdrive. The control panel warps, the world around them becomes a blur and the last thing they hear is “Never forget meeeeeee….” from Mikey Myers. That’s right! We are well on our way to completing the Halloween series, which ends up with a surprising number of BMT qualifying films. This time we enjoy the first soft reboot with the non-qualifying H20: Twenty Years Later and then the very much qualifying Halloween: Resurrection. This also help bridge from rapper-turned-actor cycle (Busta Rhymes is in Halloween: Resurrection) to our next cycle, the alternate dimension. Oooo, spooky. But not really. We just enjoyed the Dimension Films features in this last cycle so much that we decided to make a whole cycle around that one production company. Let’s go!   

Halloween: Resurrection (2002) – BMeTric: 85.4; Notability: 40

StreetCreditReport.com – BMeTric: top 0.8%; Notability: top 16.4%; Rotten Tomatoes: top 10.2%; Higher BMeT: Crossroads, Rollerball; Higher Notability: Men in Black II, The Time Machine, Scooby-Doo, Star Trek: Nemesis, Dragonfly, The Master of Disguise, John Q, Unconditional Love, Showtime, Collateral Damage, Rollerball, I Spy, The Country Bears, The Truth About Charlie, Queen of the Damned, The Tuxedo, The Adventures of Pluto Nash, Maid in Manhattan, The New Guy, Bad Company, and 21 more; Lower RT: Killing Me Softly, Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever, Hansel & Gretel, Ritual, Derailed, Try Seventeen, The Master of Disguise, Deuces Wild, Feardotcom, Half Past Dead, Rollerball, Darkness, Serving Sara, The Adventures of Pluto Nash, Boat Trip, The New Guy, Dragonfly, Stealing Harvard, Juwanna Mann, Bad Company, and 4 more; Notes: That BMeTric is gaudy. Like … this would have been a shoe-in early BMT I feel like, except that you have to watch 7 other movies before you get to it. The IMDb rating being below 4.0 is insane.

Leonard Maltin – 1.5 stars –  Six young people are chosen to spend a night in Michael Myers’ childhood home, with Web cams watching their every move. Mayhem ensues. Forget logic, story construction, consistency of characterization – the filmmakers certainly did! This movie franchise shoulda stayed dead. Curtis is only here for her name value; the director appears as a college professor.

(It certainly should have stayed dead. I am really itching to change that to “webcam”, but I’m going to resist, it is a mark of this clearly being a relatively old review. I can’t believe this isn’t a BOMB, where does the half star come from I wonder.)

Trailer – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UMV3pcxbcTA

(Well that looks atrocious. Interesting that Curtis isn’t in the trailer very much. I would have imagined they would have played up her (small) involvement more.)

DirectorsRick Rosenthal – ( Known For: Bad Boys; Nearing Grace; Distant Thunder; Just a Little Harmless Sex; Drones; Future BMT: Russkies; American Dreamer; BMT: Halloween II; Halloween: Resurrection; Notes: Notably also directed the second film. Nominated for 2 Emmys for Transparent.)

WritersDebra Hill – ( Known For: Halloween; Halloween; The Fog; Escape from L.A.; Halloween H20: 20 Years Later; Future BMT: Halloween Kills; Halloween; BMT: Halloween II; The Fog; Halloween: Resurrection; Halloween 5: The Revenge of Michael Myers; Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers; Notes: Long time collaborator with Carpenter. Died in 2005.)

John Carpenter – ( Known For: Halloween; They Live; Halloween; Escape from New York; The Fog; Prince of Darkness; Escape from L.A.; Halloween H20: 20 Years Later; Assault on Precinct 13; Dark Star; Assault on Precinct 13; Eyes of Laura Mars; Black Moon Rising; Future BMT: Lockout; Halloween Kills; Halloween; BMT: Ghosts of Mars; Halloween III: Season of the Witch; Halloween II; The Fog; Halloween: Resurrection; Halloween 5: The Revenge of Michael Myers; Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers; Notes: 84 years old and kicking. I was in Edinburgh once and there were advertisements for a concert by John Carpenter, but the dates didn’t work.)

Larry Brand – ( Known For: A Perfect Man; Backfire; The Girl on the Train; The Drifter; The Right Temptation; Masque of the Red Death; Overexposed; BMT: Halloween: Resurrection; Notes: Just died in 2019. He got his start in Hollywood as the assistant and driver to Orson Welles.)

Sean Hood – ( Known For: Cube²: Hypercube; The Crow: Wicked Prayer; Midnight Movie; BMT: Conan the Barbarian; The Legend of Hercules; Halloween: Resurrection; Notes: Started as a set dresser on Twin Peaks. He ended up with an in at Dimension where he landed this as one of his first major scripts.)

ActorsJamie Lee Curtis – ( Known For: Everything Everywhere All at Once; Knives Out; My Girl; Halloween; Trading Places; True Lies; Halloween; Escape from New York; A Fish Called Wanda; Freaky Friday; The Fog; Veronica Mars; Forever Young; Halloween H20: 20 Years Later; Prom Night; From Up on Poppy Hill; The Tailor of Panama; Spare Parts; Beverly Hills Chihuahua; Terror Train; Future BMT: Halloween Kills; You Again; My Girl 2; Drowning Mona; House Arrest; BMT: Perfect; Halloween III: Season of the Witch; Halloween II; Halloween: Resurrection; Virus; Christmas with the Kranks; Notes: Only agreed to be in the film if they killed her off, although there wasn’t much she could do about it, she was contractually obligated to appear in the sequel to H20.)

Busta Rhymes – ( Known For: Shaft; Higher Learning; Finding Forrester; Narc; The Rugrats Movie; Who’s the Man?; Breaking Point; Full Clip; King of the Dancehall; BMT: Halloween: Resurrection; Notes: Born Trevor George Smith Jr., his nickname came from George “Buster” Rhymes and was given to him by Chuck D.)

Brad Loree – ( Known For: X2: X-Men United; Timecop; Battle in Seattle; Crackerjack; Icarus; The Keeper; Heart of America; American Dragons; The Final Cut; BMT: White Chicks; Halloween: Resurrection; Texas Rangers; Notes: Plays Michael Myers in this, so not exactly a headline role in reality. He mostly is a stunt coordinator and was on this film as well.)

Budget/Gross – $13,000,000 / Domestic: $30,354,442 (Worldwide: $37,664,855)

(That is actually pretty fine. They really went for the low budget on this to try and get a return. I’m quite surprised that at that point Jamie Lee Curtis wasn’t demanding more for her role, but I guess maybe it was a deal having to do with H20.)

Rotten Tomatoes – 12% (8/67): The only thing this tired slasher flick may resurrect is nostalgia for when the genre was still fresh and scary.

(I actually can’t believe it has 8 good reviews. There are reviewers who describe the effects as “cool”. That is absurd. This movie looks like trash.)

Reviewer Highlight: It’s so devoid of joy and energy it makes even Jason X … look positively Shakespearean by comparison. – Lou Lumenick, New York Post

Poster – Halloween: MichaelMyers.com

(Not the worst poster, given the film is a joke. Feels more like I Know What You Did Last Summer than a Halloween poster, though. Still, somewhat artistic. It feels weird that I don’t hate this. B- seems high, but I’ll roll with it.)

Tagline(s) – Evil Finds Its Way Home. (C)

(I think I understand the meaning of the tagline. It’s short, too, so that’s nice. But it’s pretty much anti-clever.)

Keyword(s) – dimension

Top 10: Sin City (2005), Spectre (2015), The Others (2001), Scream (1996), Equilibrium (2002), From Dusk Till Dawn (1996), The Mist (2007), Death Proof (2007), 1408 (2007), Scary Movie (2000)

Future BMT: 86.5 The Adventures of Sharkboy and Lavagirl 3-D (2005), 82.8 Spy Kids 4: All the Time in the World (2011), 77.4 Who’s Your Caddy? (2007), 76.9 Superhero Movie (2008), 70.6 Halloween II (2009), 70.1 Black Christmas (2006), 68.6 My Boss’s Daughter (2003), 68.6 Pulse (2006), 66.9 The Crow: City of Angels (1996), 64.9 Scary Movie 4 (2006)

BMT: Scary Movie V (2013), Halloween: Resurrection (2002), Highlander: The Final Dimension (1994), Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers (1995), Highlander: Endgame (2000), Dracula 2000 (2000), Hellraiser: Bloodline (1996), Air Bud: Golden Receiver (1998), Phantoms (1998), Texas Rangers (2001), Mindhunters (2004)

Best Options (rappers): 85.4 Halloween: Resurrection (2002), 51.4 Scary Movie 3 (2003), 35.3 I Got the Hook Up (1998), 17.3 In Too Deep (1999)

(Ohhhhhh yeah. This is the new “keyword” plot, which is, in reality, a cycle plot. It is meant to track our progress through the cycle. You might notice some of the upcoming films in the Future BMT section. And then in the top 10 sub-category section it is displaying the options we had for this category. And look at that, not surprisingly this guy was our best option as ranked by BMeTric. Bully for us.)

Welcome to Earf (HoE Number 12) – The shortest path through The Movie Database cast lists using only BMT films is: Jamie Lee Curtis is No. 1 billed in Halloween: Resurrection and No. 2 billed in Christmas with the Kranks, which also stars Tim Allen (No. 1 billed) who is in Jungle 2 Jungle (No. 1 billed) which also stars Leelee Sobieski (No. 6 billed) who is in Here on Earth (No. 1 billed) => (1 + 2) + (1 + 1) + (6 + 1) = 12. There is no shorter path at the moment.

Notes – Jamie Lee Curtis hated the idea of a sequel, as she felt that Laurie had a satisfying ending in the previous film. She initially refused to be in this film, until she ultimately agreed to do her part, only under the condition that she is killed off in the opening of the film so as to make sure her character, Laurie Strode (or herself) wouldn’t appear in another sequel.

Jamie Lee Curtis was quoted as saying she considered this film a joke.

Was first named “Halloween: The Homecoming”, but producers wanted a title that said Michael Myers is alive so in February 2002, the film was officially named Halloween: Resurrection (2002).

Originally, the executives of Miramax wanted to continue the series by creating a whole new story of which didn’t have anything to do with Michael Myers after the last film, in a similar manner to Halloween III: Season of the Witch (1982). However, poll results conducted throughout fan websites proved to the producers that fans wanted Michael Myers to return again.

Several new endings were written during production and the cast was never sure how the film was actually going to end. Four different endings were filmed, and the director wanted the studio to ship a different ending to each theater, a technique used before during the theatrical release of Clue (1985). However, the studio disagreed and the endings now appear on the DVD and Blu-ray.

Jamie Lee Curtis appears on the movie cover with short hair, despite having long hair in the film. If looked at more closely, one can easily tell that it’s the same picture of her that was used for the poster of the previous film, Halloween H20: 20 Years Later (1998).

Bianca Kajlich’s scream had to be dubbed in post production.

While in the asylum, Laurie Strode has a Raggedy Ann doll. In the original movie, she had a similar Raggedy Ann doll on the dresser in her bedroom.

The only one movie to establish Michael Myers’ birth date: October 19, 1957.

Michael’s use of a spiked leg of a tripod as a weapon is an homage to Michael Powell’s Peeping Tom (1960).

Surviving the Game Recap

Jamie

“What’s Surviving the Game?” is the only real response to learning that we watched this for BMT. It came, it qualified for BMT, it did not conquer. It ultimately feels a little like what streaming films are like today. Could have been (should have been?) on HBO instead of in theaters. But that is the long past. This is the present and in the present we can only watch what’s on the screen (and on any sweet, sweet DVD extras they might have graced us with).

So first and foremost I have to say that Surviving the Game is serviceable. It services the human race’s apparent need to watch humans-hunting-humans. It’s a tale as old as time (if time started in 1924) and it is a pretty straight adaptation despite the 70 year gap between source material and adaptation. Ice-T is a homeless man offered a nice sum of money to participate as a guide for a hunt. He has no experience, he exclaims, but whatevs, they are looking to help Ice-T out. Not suspicious at all. When he gets out to the secluded cabin in the wilds of Oregon he is shocked to find that all the hunters are rich maniacs. He is fortunate to have a place to sleep at night given all the scenery these rich maniacs are chewing. But alas, these aren’t just your regular Joe, scenery-consuming rich maniacs… these are rich maniacs who like to hunt Ice-T. Uh oh! So Ice-T starts his escape and through cunning and mostly a desperate desire to live, he is able to pick off the richie riches one-by-one. Just as he is about to kill the main player and make his escape he is blown up by a timed explosive in a decoy plane. Darn, looks like Rutger Hauer got away. Not so fast! What a twist! Ice-T survived and shows up in Seattle to take out Rutger before he makes his final escape.

As you can see the film is straightforward, which is nice. There is some funny stuff in there too. All the actors are way way way over the top and I’m there for it. There are also some funny random moments in the film including some pretty suspect practical effects and the fact that Hauer sets up a bomb for Ice-T at the end, but after blowing him up doesn’t seem to care that he doesn’t find a body. It’s like Hauer assumed that Ice-T was entirely obliterated by the bomb and not a speck was left… like a cartoon. No wonder Ice-T is able to nab him by the end. That’s just not good thinking by our bad guy. So overall, not bad, with some fun mixed in to boot. Before I jump into Hot Take Clam Bake, just a quick word on our Bring a Friend, Sonic Impact. I found this movie confounding, at times hilarious, and eventually a pretty good Friend. It’s a film constructed around clips from Airport 1975, but set up like a Die Hard scenario, so there is a lot of meandering about until the big action scene comes into play. My favorite was how they keep telling the main character that he should take a vacation, so for the first half of the film we see him discuss it with people, pack up his bag, drive to a travel agency only to get called into action seconds from booking the trip. The bad guy nicely hammed it up, too. So as I said, good Friend.

Anyway, for Hot Take Clam Bake I’m making the case that the man who recruited Ice-T, played by Charles S. Dutton, was actually a good guy who saw the potential of Ice-T as the hero he needed to finally put a stop to the evil cabal he became involved with. He saw through Ice-T’s seeming lack of interest in life and fall into destitution to see the man within. A man who’s superior smarts and skills could finally stop Hauer in his tracks. Hauer is even like “come on, are you sure?” but Dutton is adamant that this is the man they want… truly the most dangerous game, and in fact a game so dangerous that he would tear it all down. Sure, Dutton dies in the end, but that was the sacrifice he was willing to make. Why do you think he’s laughing deliriously after being blown up by Ice-T? The student has become the teacher and even in death he knows his plan has worked. Who else could survive a bomb blast, bury himself in the sand convincingly enough to escape detection, and then reappear hundreds of miles away to swoop out of the darkness like Batman to kill Hauer? Ice-T, that’s who, and Dutton knew it all along.

I give that Hot Take Clam Bake a rating of Scorching Hot. Patrick?

Patrick

‘Ello everyone! Surviving the Game? More like Surviving this Movie?! Amirite? Who would have thought that the best adaptation of The Most Dangerous Game would star Ice-T. Wait … no, strike that, I meant “worst”. Let’s go!

  • Weird movie. Based on The Most Dangerous Game, but also only a year after Hard Target starring Van Damme which is ostensibly the exact same story, all the way down to Van Damme effectively being a vagrant recruited into the game. Ice-T is basically what makes this movie unique, I suppose representing a different underclass being exploited … still feels a bit pointless.
  • The testosterone on set must have been off the chain! Hauer, Busey, and McGinley are all trying to chew the scenery to such a degree that I don’t know how the director could even have wrangled them. Especially McGinley. There are moments where he’s stumbling and screeching and grabbing other actors to such a degree that I wonder if people were telling him to take it that far or whether there was no one there to tell him to chill out.
  • Fun little picture though if you are into the underlying story. Feels more like a “friend” than an actual wide release, but the 90s were crazy man, and Busey at least still felt like a bankable star. Makes sense that the director openly said he regretted killing him off early.
  • Interesting Setting as a Character (Where?) for Washington state, which is made explicit through several references to the beginning of the film taking place in Seattle. And honestly that is it. I think it is closest to Good in the end, just because you’ll get some mileage out of seeing Ice-T kill a bunch of people and the generic story is a classic for a reason.
  • This cycle’s friend is also an Ice-T vehicle called Sonic Impact. Films like this I usually find rather boring, but for some reason this one enamored me. I think it is a combination of having watched enough mediocre/bad movies that I can recognize Sonic Impact as merely a poor man’s Turbulence mixed with a poor man’s Executive Decision. And then half the film being literally Airport 1975’s shots of an airplane flying near the Rocky Mountains. And then Ice-T spending half the film looking embarrassed that he got captured and is in handcuffs with nothing to do. All it needed was the poorly-named bad guy Jeremy Barrett to have a sweet hook … like being obsessed with poetry, or being like an accomplished mathematician or some weird choice. As it is, it’ll settle as a solid B+ friend, something I might watch once more before realizing that it isn’t worth it.

Go and check out the sequel television movie crossover event, Law & Order: SVUing the Game, detailed in the Quiz. Cheerios,

The Sklog

Surviving the Game Quiz

So get this, I was a bit off my game … by which I mean homeless, when a nice guy offered me a swish gig at his hunting cabin. The next thing I know I’m in a very dangerous game and one of them knocked me on my noggin to boot! Well, needless to say I can’t remember a thing. Do you remember what happened in Surviving the Game?

Pop Quiz Hot Shot!

1) At the beginning of the film our hero Ice-T tries to kill himself before he gets convinced to become a wilderness guide instead. This is instigated by two events. Name them.

2) Awwww, Ice-T doesn’t seem too keen on their plan to hunt the amnimals. But they did bring a “special guest” animal. What kind (bonus if you remember his name)?

3) The Most Dangerous Game is afoot! What are the rules of the game?

4) We got Rutger Hauer, Gary Busey, Charles Dutton, F. Murray Abraham (and his son), and John C. McGinley. They gotta die! How and in what order do they die during the hunt?

5) Well all of his hunting clients are dead and there is a seriously pissed Ice-T after him in Seattle, so time for Hauer to escape. What does he disguise himself as in order to escape?

Bonus Question: In the mid-credits scene we are treated to a bit of a cameo. Who appears?

Answers

Surviving the Game Preview

Just as Future Mikey #1 is approaching Jamie and Patrick to figuratively rip out their hearts, Repo Men style (as the kids say), they hear someone say, “Don’t you lay a finger on those butterfingers, baby.” They all stare slack-jawed as Future Mikey #2 unexpectedly kicks Future Mikey #1 in the testicles… hard. They all laugh, obviously, and then turn their attention to Future Mikey #2. “I think we all are on the same page now,” begins Jamie, “Nice to meet you Future Mikey who was a teenhearthrob-turned-timecop.” Future Mikey #2 nods his head. It’s true, unbeknownst to Future Mikey #1 he had inadvertently crossed the time-stream (pardon the technical term) and picked up a Future Mikey timecop who held the Bad Movie Twins in the highest esteem. “I bided my time, waiting till I could help you by taking you… back to the future.” They all chuckle and sigh. Anyway, time to get going. But before they can get in their PT Cruiser time machine they hear a chilling gurgling sound from behind them. It’s Future Mikey #1! He’s on his feet, pistol in hand, blood pouring from his nose and mouth as a result of his crushed testes. “You… you… can’t stop the future.” But before he can shoot a microphone spins into view and knocks the pistol slightly off target. Mikey Myers has caught up just in time to save the day! The bullet ricochets off a nearby hot dog cart, back through the window of the PT Cruiser, and destroys the control panel in a shower of sparks. “Quick, we’ll have to get to my time machine,” Future Mikey #2 says before looking back Future Mikey #1, now reloading his pistol. “If we can survive.” That’s right! We are watching the Ice-T classic that everyone remembers is a film. It’s called Surviving the Game and is one of several Most Dangerous Game adaptations that have washed up on BMT shores over the years. We are pairing it with another Ice-T straight-to-dvd film called Sonic Impact. Why? Mostly because it looks rad and was so hard to find I ended up having to buy it used. Can’t go wrong with a plane flick. Let’s go!

Surviving the Game (1994) – BMeTric: 20.7; Notability: 24

StreetCreditReport.com – BMeTric: top 30.0%; Notability: top 32.0%; Rotten Tomatoes: top 26.5%; Higher BMeT: Street Fighter, Police Academy: Mission to Moscow, Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Next Generation, Junior, The Next Karate Kid, Double Dragon, On Deadly Ground, The Flintstones, It’s Pat: The Movie, North, The Fantastic Four, Leprechaun 2, 3 Ninjas Kick Back, Exit to Eden, In the Army Now, Color of Night, Richie Rich, Car 54, Where Are You?, Blank Check, My Girl 2, and 55 more; Higher Notability: The Flintstones, The Shadow, Wyatt Earp, Beverly Hills Cop III, Love Affair, Ready to Wear, North, Radioland Murders, I Love Trouble, The Pagemaster, Exit to Eden, Little Giants, Street Fighter, Drop Zone, D2: The Mighty Ducks, Speechless, Junior, Thumbelina, The Scout, The Specialist, and 60 more; Lower RT: Wagons East, Police Academy: Mission to Moscow, House Party 3, Death Wish: The Face of Death, It’s Pat: The Movie, The Silence of the Hams, Holy Matrimony, Car 54, Where Are You?, Getting Even with Dad, A Low Down Dirty Shame, Major League II, Exit to Eden, Trapped in Paradise, Lightning Jack, In the Army Now, Leprechaun 2, The Specialist, The Next Karate Kid, Trial by Jury, Blank Check, and 42 more; Notes: Hmmmm, maybe a cult classic then. Above 6.0 for a film like this is interesting. One of the lower notability / BMeTric films we’ve done in a while. Should be fun.

Leonard Maltin – 1.5 stars –  Only the absence of Maria Conchita Alonso keeps this umpteenth variation of The Most Dangerous Game from having the definitive schlock action cast, as destitute Ice-T is unwittingly hired to perform vague duties at a secluded woodsy resort, only to learn he’s the prey of high-roller hunters. Sub-routine chase pic is Confusion City all the way; it’s difficult to believe that the same plot could be recycled less than a year after John Woo’s far more stylish Hard Target.

(Hard Target was good. Also, return of the semicolon! Oh how I’ve missed you my old friend. And finally, nice to see Maltin definitively not thinking this is a cult classic. Makes a lot of sense. Maltin reveres old Hollywood pictures it feels like, so a useless remake of a classic isn’t going to sit super well with him.)

Trailer – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6SdUm-xFu38/

(Yeah, looks like crap. Insane Gary Busey though. That could be fun. A bit of an odd choice for an ensemble cast, but I guess you need bodies if Ice-T is going to kill a bunch of people.)

DirectorsErnest R. Dickerson – ( Known For: Juice; Ambushed; Double Play; Blind Faith; Future BMT: Tales from the Crypt: Demon Knight; BMT: Surviving the Game; Bulletproof; Bones; Never Die Alone; Notes: We’ve seen a lot of his films in the last year. I mentioned in the Bones preview that he is most notable for being Spike Lee’s cinematographer on a his early films.)

WritersEric Bernt – ( Known For: The Echo; Future BMT: Virtuosity; The Hitcher; BMT: Romeo Must Die; Surviving the Game; Highlander: Endgame; Notes: Virtuosity is basically the only bad 90s future film we haven’t seen for BMT. Produced the television series Z Nation.)

ActorsRutger Hauer – ( Known For: Batman Begins; Blade Runner; Sin City; Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets; The Sisters Brothers; Iron Mask; The Osterman Weekend; Ladyhawke; The Hitcher; Confessions of a Dangerous Mind; Flesh+Blood; Split Second; Nighthawks; Hobo with a Shotgun; Turkish Delight; Minotaur; Blind Fury; 24 Hours to Live; Spetters; Soldier of Orange; Future BMT: Buffy the Vampire Slayer; Samson; Wanted: Dead or Alive; The Letters; BMT: The Rite; Surviving the Game; Notes: My lockdown sourdough starter was names Rutger Sour. He’s Dutch. Was in the military, but forced his way out by convincing his superiors that he was mentally unfit for service.)

Ice-T – ( Known For: The Other Guys; New Jack City; Ricochet; CB4; Trespass; Ticker; Who’s the Man?; Mean Guns; Once Upon a Time in Brooklyn; Below Utopia; Ablaze; ‘R Xmas; Final Voyage; Jacob Two Two Meets the Hooded Fang; Sonic Impact; What Now; Corrupt; The Alternate; The Wrecking Crew; Future BMT: Tank Girl; UglyDolls; Breakin’; Breakin’ 2: Electric Boogaloo; BMT: Johnny Mnemonic; 3000 Miles to Graceland; Surviving the Game; Notes: Also was in the military, but dropped out after four years to pursue music. Was one of the originators of Gansta Rap, and now is probably more well-known as an actor on Law & Order: SVU.)

Charles S. Dutton – ( Known For: Se7en; A Time to Kill; Alien 3; Menace II Society; Secret Window; Mimic; Mississippi Masala; Rudy; Cat’s Eye; Eye See You; Q&A; Bad Ass; The Express; Cookie’s Fortune; Jacknife; Get on the Bus; Cry, the Beloved Country; The Monkey’s Paw; Honeydripper; American Violet; Future BMT: Legion; Gothika; The Perfect Guy; Nick of Time; A Low Down Dirty Shame; Fame; The Distinguished Gentleman; Last Dance; Against the Ropes; BMT: Crocodile Dundee II; Surviving the Game; Random Hearts; Black Dog; No Mercy; Notes: He won three Emmys for The Corner (Directing), The Practice, and Without a Trace (both as a Guest Star). Went to Yale. Was originally supposed to be in Halloween: H20, but his role was eventually cut.)

Budget/Gross – $7.4 million / Domestic: $7,727,256 (Worldwide: $7,727,256)

(Huh … like not a bomb? It is wild that a film like this could make nearly $10 million. It seems like a direct-to-video effort through and through.)

Rotten Tomatoes – 24% (4/17)

(Oh boy, I get to make a consensus: Poorly written with absurd action sequences, Surviving the Game is merely yet-another derivative action flick.)

Reviewer Highlight: Essentially, the movie is Cliffhanger with one third the firepower.  – Owen Gleiberman, Entertainment Weekly

Poster – Sklogifying the Game

(Wooooowwwwww. That’s bad. Like real bad. The colors are bad. That spacing is bad. Nothing makes sense. It creates more questions than answers. Only positive is a little font work. D.)

Tagline(s) – The thrill is the kill. (A)

(I mean, I can’t deny that it is a fun tagline. The thing that bothers me a little is that the poster and the tagline kinda, you know, give me the unsettling feeling that the makers of the movie kinda were digging Ice-T getting hunted. He barely appears on the poster and he’s the hero. Everyone else are trash people who hunt people… but yeah, the thrill of the kill, for sure. Still can’t dock it much on moral grounds. It’s a good tagline.)

Keyword(s) – hunting, survival

Top 10: The Blue Lagoon (1980), Avatar (2009), The Hunger Games (2012), Split (2016), The Hunt (2020), Predator (1987), Apocalypto (2006), Jurassic World (2015), Ice Age (2002), Exodus: Gods and Kings (2014)

Future BMT: 34.0 Exodus: Gods and Kings (2014), 30.4 Wrong Turn (2003), 27.6 The Legend of Tarzan (2016), 12.4 Brother Bear (2003)

BMT: The Blue Lagoon (1980), Dreamcatcher (2003), The Clan of the Cave Bear (1986), Surviving the Game (1994)

Matches: Surviving the Game (1994)

(Decided to go for the double. Very interesting that it seems like a boom in the 00s/10s, although I couldn’t possibly give you a solid theory as to why. Out of the possible upcoming BMTs I would be most excited for Wrong Turn.)

Welcome to Earf (HoE Number 13) – The shortest path through The Movie Database cast lists using only BMT films is: Charles S. Dutton is No. 3 billed in Surviving the Game and No. 3 billed in Random Hearts, which also stars Harrison Ford (No. 1 billed) who is in Hollywood Homicide (No. 1 billed) which also stars Josh Hartnett (No. 2 billed) who is in Here on Earth (No. 3 billed) => (3 + 3) + (1 + 1) + (2 + 3) = 13. There is no shorter path at the moment.

Notes – According to Rutger Hauer, Gary Busey wrote his entire dinner monologue about the origin of his scar himself. The script had several scenes of Hauer’s character Burns establishing his natural leadership by reminding the other hunters to abide by his rules. Originally, the dinner scene would be the moment where he puts Busey’s character Doc back in his place. However, on the day of rehearsals, Busey came up with a two-page monologue about his dog that he wanted to try out. Hauer felt that Busey was obviously trying to steal his scene away by not giving him a chance to intervene in his monologue. So during the actual filming, Hauer improvised a quick response to the story by calling it “bullshit”, which greatly confused Busey. However, Busey’s delivery so impressed the director and the other actors that his monologue was kept in the final film, and Hauer’s retort wasn’t used.

This movie was released less than a year after Hard Target (1993), with a similar plot about homeless people being hunted for sport.

The landing strip and cabin seen in the movie are at Lake Wenatchee State Airport, Washington, which is very close to civilization. The cabin has since been torn down.

While staying in Wenatchee, Washington in September 1993 during the shooting of this movie, F. Murray Abraham was injured in a car crash, suffering a fractured wrist, bruised ribs, and facial lacerations, after he was struck by a drunk driver.

Almost all of the “city” scenes were filmed in downtown Wenatchee, Washington. Most scenes were filmed with a two-block perimeter of Mission, Orondo, Palouse, and Columbia streets, plus the alley behind the Liberty Theater off of Mission Street. The area includes the infamous Bruce Hotel, which became Bruce Transitional Housing for the homeless in the early 2000s.

This is one of numerous movies based on the short story “The Most Dangerous Game”, written by Richard Connell, first published in 1924 in Collier’s Magazine.

Despite being bookended by scenes set in Seattle, Washington, not a single frame of the movie was actually shot there.

The same year this movie was released, Ice-T’s metal band Body Count recorded an unrelated song with the title “Surviving the Game”, which appeared on their second album, “Born Dead”.

While traveling to the campsite in the plane…Jack Mason ( Ice T ) looks out the window…Below was an Albino moose… In Canada, it is a unique variety and is considered by the local population and good luck to the indigenous culture.

Repo Men Recap

Jamie

After an unironically promising start to the cycle we finally hit our first stinker. Repo Men is about a couple of former military jackasses who use their skillz to repossess mechanical organs that people fail to pay off. Jude Law ends up getting shocked by a piece of faulty equipment and receives a heart transplant. Aahhh, repossessor has become the repossessee. Quickly realizing he doesn’t have… the heart… for his job anymore and thus can’t pay for the organ he goes on the run with a cyborg lady (more or less). Forest Whitaker is hot on his trail and they get into a big ol’ battle. Realizing that he’ll never outrun Forest, Law and his cyborg friend break into the transplant factory, delete all their organs from the files, and live happily ever after on the beach… or did they? It’s a twist, baby! Whitaker actually totally owned Law earlier and put him in a coma. They then did a brain transplant which gave him a happy life to live out.

So yeah, the biggest issue with all of this is a classic doozy. It’s pretty rare to find an “it was all a dream” plot device in the wild. So well-worn and unsatisfying for audiences, it’s basically a guaranteed ticket to the BMT zone. About 20 minutes into the film Whitaker started talking about a neural transplant he saw at a trade show and I immediately texted Patrick to ask if it was possible we were going to be treated to such a twist. His coy reply was everything I needed to know. It never works and it didn’t here. Particularly given just how weird his “dream” is at the end.

That’s a nice parlay into my second biggest gripe with the film. While Law and Whitaker get to have a bunch of fun, the female characters in the movie are either drugged up weirdos or total wet blankets. This culminates with Law’s “dream” where after getting into an argument with his ex-wife, his son inadvertently shocks her into unconsciousness with a taser. Law can barely contain his glee. He then proceeds Oldboy style into the transplant HQ and has a super super super (super) weird pseudosexual transplant extraction scene with his primary love interest. It is straight out of a deviant art page from the early 2000s. I honestly am having trouble shaking that part of the film. It is startling… and to think that that whole sequence was part of his neural transplant induced life of perfection is upsetting. As for good things, I will say it’s stylish and has some superb acting by Forest Whitaker. That’s as far as I’m willing to go with the complements.

I’m feeling my soon to be trademarked segment of Hot Take Clam Bake, where I stake my claim on a hot take about the film. This time I’m making the claim that a large portion of this film is actually a dream. “But Jamie, we already knew that!” But did you? I’m claiming that even more of the film is a dream! What a twist! My claim is that the shock that resulted in Law’s heart transplant was actually a shock that resulted in Law’s neural transplant. My primary piece of evidence is that the film takes a real weird left turn at that very moment. Law awakens in the hospital with Whitaker and Liev Schreiber giddily telling him he had a heart transplant. Already weird. Then after he has lost the nerve for his job he stumbles upon a lady who he saw singing earlier in the film. Weird, she’s singing the same song now… in the middle of nowhere… and also has had a transplant… and also loves him. It’s all so coincidental and weird. Finally, no matter where he goes Whitaker seems to always find him. It’s like he’s the center of the universe… but he’s not. In the plot of the film he’s just another nobody who can’t pay for his organ. Three things all add up to this being a dream and the original dream being a Wicker Man level dream within a dream. Case closed.

I put that Hot Take Clam Bake at “Steaming.” Patrick?

Patrick

‘Ello everyone! Repo Men? More like Please No, Man! What everyone was a-clamoring for in the post-’08 financial meltdown world: the heartwarming story of people falling behind on payments and literally dying at the hands of repo men … Let’s go!

  • This movie is bleak. The kind of film that was exclusively made (mainstream) in the late 2000s I feel like. That gritty real nonsense version of sci-fi with in-your-face gore, washed out backgrounds, and a narrator.
  • SPOILEES! It was all a dream. I honestly didn’t really think movies actually Jacob’s Ladder-ed you. But this is a full blown Jacob’s Ladder. Like half the film doesn’t exist. It is so stupid.
  • We watched the Unrated version (bully for us) so we apparently got a ton of extra stuff including John Leguizamo who was cut out of the theatrical release. That’s crazy.
  • As pointed out in the Flophouse podcast on this film (from years and years ago, around when it came out) they posit a world in which basically 60% of people have artificial organs. It is begging for an explanation where it is shown that The Union is also releasing chemicals into the world which is causing people’s organs to fail or something.
  • What else … the film is entirely narrated, that is a blast from the past. Forest Whitaker is great, like legitimately quite good, that’s a surprise. Everything else you can just give or take.
  • Solid Product Placement (What?) for Volkswagon throughout. I’ll throw out the Future Movie (When?) for this as this is a very good example of an actual sci-fi future film, which is more rare than you would think. And this might be the runaway winner of Worst Twist (How?) for Jacob’s Laddering us. Definitely closest to Bad just for being a bit boring and weird for my tastes.
  • Special Features Alert! The DVD (from the ‘brary as I like to call it) was chockablock with special features. We got deleted scenes (B-, a good number, but none were particularly interesting), we got fake commercials (F, not funny and pointless), we got a sfx short documentary (A, funny and interesting to see that some of the shots were entirely CGI), and, of course, we got an audio commentary with the director and both writers of the film. The commentary was fine, a solid B. The director was funny and seemed to be really proud of the film (they recorded it three weeks prior to opening weekend, so they didn’t know how it was going to be received), and overall they told a bunch of interesting production tidbits. It ain’t Ben Affleck dunking on Armageddon, but it was enough for a commentary-head like me to enjoy.

As usual, go to the Quiz to find out about the long lost sequel to Repo Men. Cheerios,

The Sklogs

Repo Men Quiz

Oh man, so get this. I got bopped right on the head, and now I have to get a fake brain for my head before I die. Luckily it means I’ll be in debt forever and my life will suck. Unluckily I can’t remember a thing. Do you remember what happened in Repo Men?

Pop Quiz Hot Shot!

1) We open with a repo (natch). What organ is he getting back?

2) Where did Jake and Remy meet, and how did they end up in The Union?

3) How and where do Jake and Remy find the first nest?

4) Remy has been knocked out on four occasions. Name them.

5) What is the big plan in the end to get themselves to safety?

Bonus Question: The mid-credits scene shows a fancy new product from The Union. What is it?

Answers

Repo Men Preview

“Looks like you didn’t expect this, Bad Movie Twins,” says Future Mikey #1. “Come on, dummies. We’re time cops. There is no limit to our power,” laughs Future Mikey #2. Jamie and Patrick despair. If they escape this, Mikey can just come back with however many time cops he needs. They contemplate their options. But even as they are doing it, a loud crackling screech comes from a nearby stage. Parsons, Ty, and Mikey Myers are up there and launch into an impromptu poolside concert. Suddenly teenyboppers are swarming and the Future Mikey’s are swept away in the crowd. Mikey is crooning his latest hit, “Run, Run From Your Heart” and Jamie, Patrick and LePumice do just that as they dash into the casino. It’s churning with bodies as they weave their way to where they parked the PT Cruiser. They let out a heavy sigh of relief as the purple sheen of the car comes into sight. Just as quickly their hearts fall. On the wheel is a boot labeled Time Cop Industries. They spin around, confronted once again with the two Future Mikey’s. “Poor, pathetic Bad Movie Twins. Did you really think a puny concert like that would stop us? Did you think we wouldn’t see through your sad excuse for a PT Cruiser disguise for your time machine? Sure, metallic purple PT Cruisers are everywhere. Wildly popular for a reason: they are rad. But your license plate is HOE4EVER. Either you’re a very excited farmer or you are the Here on Earth megafans we know you to be.” Jamie and Patrick curse their misfortune. They didn’t even order a vanity plate. That plate came with the car. What bad luck! “Prepare,” the Future Mikey’s say, “because we’re about to rip out your heart.” That’s right! We’re watching the 2010 film Repo Men (not to be confused with Repo Man) starring Jude Law and Forest Whitaker and featuring RZA in a minor role. It’s set in the future where people get organ transplants on a payment plan and… well… I think you get it. Let’s go!

Repo Men (2010) – BMeTric: 24.2; Notability: 52

StreetCreditReport.com – BMeTric: top 25.6%; Notability: top 6.4%; Rotten Tomatoes: top 20.0%; Higher BMeT: The Last Airbender, Vampires Suck, Birdemic: Shock and Terror, Skyline, Sex and the City 2, Furry Vengeance, Jonah Hex, Gulliver’s Travels, Marmaduke, Cats & Dogs: The Revenge of Kitty Galore, Yogi Bear, Tekken, My Soul to Take, Tooth Fairy, Legion, A Nightmare on Elm Street, Why Did I Get Married Too?, Passion Play, The Back-up Plan, Killers, and 44 more; Higher Notability: Clash of the Titans, The Wolfman, Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time, Valentine’s Day, Sex and the City 2, The Tourist, Gulliver’s Travels, Marmaduke, Cats & Dogs: The Revenge of Kitty Galore, Tooth Fairy, The Last Airbender, Little Fockers, Shanghai, All Good Things, Eat Pray Love, Burlesque; Lower RT: Tekken, Passion Play, Twelve, 6 Souls, Shanghai, Vampires Suck, The Last Airbender, The Tortured, Waiting for Forever, Dylan Dog: Dead of Night, Furry Vengeance, 13, Crazy on the Outside, Marmaduke, Little Fockers, My Soul to Take, Saw: The Final Chapter, Killers, Grown Ups, Virginia, and 29 more; Notes: Love the Notability (how do you do that on a $30 million budget though?). The IMDb rating is stock still. 6.3 definitely in that “cult classic” territory where this film must have a decently devoted fanbase to it. Interesting, 17 films with higher Notabilities, and we’ve only seen five of them. That is crazy to think about.

RogerEbert.com – 2.0 stars – There are enough props in this movie to clean out the Organ Department at Moo & Oink’s. When I say they’re up to their elbows in blood, I mean it. This work takes its toll. Remy’s friend at work is a repo man named Jake, played by Forest Whitaker. Like most Forest Whitaker characters and Whitaker himself, he is a warm, nice man. I noticed for the second time in a week (after “Our Family Wedding”) that Whitaker has lost a lot of weight and looks great. I hope the extra pounds weren’t repo’ed.

(Moo and Oink’s funny. But what a weird way to end this review. Just a paragraph complimenting Whitaker for looking svelte.)

Trailer – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jl9Nvg4yuus/

(I mean, it isn’t exactly my cup of tea, but I can see what people might find appealing about it. Feels a bit like Priest. Understandably interesting premise, but also understandably thin film in the end.)

DirectorsMiguel Sapochnik – ( Known For: Finch; BMT: Repo Men; Notes: He’s directed mostly television including 6 episodes of Game of Thrones (for which he won two Emmys, one of which for directing the episode Battle of the Bastards).)

WritersEric Garcia – ( Known For: Matchstick Men; Strange But True; BMT: Repo Men; Notes: This book was optioned before it was completed, which makes sense since he had already had a book he wrote (Matchstick Men) optioned for a very successful film.)

Garrett Lerner – ( BMT: Repo Men; Notes: Almost exclusively a pretty big television writer (including for John Doe and Ordinary Joe). Nominated for four Emmys for his work on House M.D.)

ActorsJude Law – ( Known For: Fantastic Beasts: The Secrets of Dumbledore; Sherlock Holmes; Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows; The Grand Budapest Hotel; Captain Marvel; Gattaca; Contagion; The Talented Mr. Ripley; Road to Perdition; The Aviator; The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus; Closer; A.I. Artificial Intelligence; A Series of Unfortunate Events; Cold Mountain; Anna Karenina; Hugo; A Rainy Day in New York; Spy; The Holiday; Future BMT: Fantastic Beasts: The Crimes of Grindelwald; The Rhythm Section; King Arthur: Legend of the Sword; All the King’s Men; BMT: Repo Men; Notes: Born in London, and nominated for two Oscars (Cold Mountain and The Talented Mr. Ripley). Playing Captain Hook in an upcoming adaptation of Peter Pan.)

Forest Whitaker – ( Known For: Black Panther; Rogue One: A Star Wars Story; How It Ends; Arrival; Fast Times at Ridgemont High; Sorry to Bother You; Platoon; Panic Room; Good Morning, Vietnam; Where the Wild Things Are; The Butler; Southpaw; Bloodsport; The Crying Game; The Color of Money; Respect; Phone Booth; The Last King of Scotland; Out of the Furnace; City of Lies; Future BMT: Taken 3; Street Kings; Vantage Point; Blown Away; Consenting Adults; Ready to Wear; Our Family Wedding; Light It Up; BMT: Species; Battlefield Earth; First Daughter; Repo Men; Razzie Notes: Nominee for Worst Supporting Actor for Battlefield Earth in 2001; Notes: Won an Oscar for The Last King of Scotland. Has said in interviews that he has considered corrective surgery for his eye, but that it was too late as it has become something of a trademark for him.)

Alice Braga – ( Known For: The Suicide Squad; Soul; City of God; I Am Legend; Elysium; Predators; On the Road; Redbelt; Blindness; Crossing Over; The Duel; Kill Me Three Times; Lower City; Journey to the End of the Night; Sólo Dios sabe; Ardor; O Cheiro do Ralo; Latitudes; Future BMT: The New Mutants; The Shack; BMT: The Rite; Repo Men; Notes: Brazilian. Is slated to appear in an upcoming murder mystery show called Retreat which sounds interesting.)

Budget/Gross – $32,000,000 / Domestic: $13,794,835 (Worldwide: $18,409,891)

(I mean … disastrous. How a film like this could only make $18 million is beyond me. And a rarity because it feels like $32 million is also a bargain on the budget as well considering the effects that it must have involved. Wild.)

Rotten Tomatoes – 22% (33/153): Repo Men has an intriguing premise, as well as a likable pair of leads, but they’re wasted on a rote screenplay, indifferent direction, and mind-numbing gore.

(Mind-numbing gore sounds about right for 2010. Right on the tail end of probably the worst (reviewed) decade in film history just from the perspective that there was actual junk being put into theaters on a regular basis. And not like Roger Corman junk, like big budget junk released to 2000 theaters. It mostly disappeared after 2010, probably due to streaming becoming a financially viable alternative. This would have definitely been a weird Netflix movie or series these days.)

Reviewer Highlight: There are plenty of moments when the appearance of a flying, green-glow Chevy Malibu would be a welcome distraction. – Keith Uhlich, Time Out

Poster – Beep-Boop Men

(I dig it. Fun font. Nice color scheme. Showing off your stars. Biggest complaints are that it’s not particularly interesting or artistic and it doesn’t tell me much about the film… so why would I be excited for it? B)

Tagline(s) – For a price, any organ in your body can be replaced. But it can also be repossessed. (F)

Consider them your final notice. (A)

(I feel like they needed these taglines because the poster wasn’t giving much information about the film. So the first one is like an elevator pitch. I hate it. Too long and boring. The second one is actually good. If the poster was better then they could have just used that one and really won the day. Cause it is short and sweet and good.)

Keyword(s) – future

Top 10: Dune (2021), The Adam Project (2022), Moonshot (2022), Blade Runner 2049 (2017), Interstellar (2014), Dune (1984), Mad Max: Fury Road (2015), The Fifth Element (1997), Blade Runner (1982), The Hunger Games (2012)

Future BMT: 52.6 Tank Girl (1995), 51.9 Johnny Be Good (1988), 45.9 Virtuosity (1995), 45.6 Voyagers (2021), 44.4 Brick Mansions (2014), 42.2 Red Planet (2000), 35.0 The Ice Pirates (1984), 33.3 Lockout (2012), 30.4 Mortal Engines (2018), 30.3 Push (2009)

BMT: Barb Wire (1996), 2012 (2009), Event Horizon (1997), After Earth (2013), Demolition Man (1993), Lost in Space (1998), Dragonball Evolution (2009), The Postman (1997), Æon Flux (2005), Battlefield Earth (2000), RoboCop 2 (1990), Ghosts of Mars (2001), Judge Dredd (1995), Priest (2011), Cyborg (1989), Johnny Mnemonic (1995), RoboCop 3 (1993), Star Trek V: The Final Frontier (1989), Soldier (1998), Repo Men (2010), Double Dragon (1994), Solarbabies (1986), Babylon A.D. (2008), Freejack (1992), Supernova (2000), The Adventures of Pluto Nash (2002), A Sound of Thunder (2005), Heartbeeps (1981)

Matches: Dune (2021), The Adam Project (2022), Moonshot (2022), Interstellar (2014), The Fifth Element (1997), Blade Runner (1982), Idiocracy (2006), Her (2013), Looper (2012), Black Panther (2018), Prometheus (2012), Starship Troopers (1997), In Time (2011), Alita: Battle Angel (2019), The Tomorrow War (2021), The Lobster (2015), Logan (2017), V for Vendetta (2005), The Terminator (1984), X-Men (2000), Star Trek (2009), Terminator 2: Judgment Day (1991), The Master (2012), Oblivion (2013), 12 Monkeys (1995), WALL·E (2008), Terminator: Dark Fate (2019), 2012 (2009), Mortal Engines (2018), Minority Report (2002), Waterworld (1995), Cloud Atlas (2012), The Matrix Revolutions (2003), Mr. Nobody (2009), Back to the Future Part II (1989), I, Robot (2004), The Hunger Games: Mockingjay – Part 2 (2015), A.I. Artificial Intelligence (2001), Terminator Genisys (2015), Chappie (2015), Ghost in the Shell (2017), The Giver (2014), The Island (2005), Downsizing (2017), Demolition Man (1993), High Life (2018), Equilibrium (2002), Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines (2003), Lost in Space (1998), Doomsday (2008), Surrogates (2009), Zone 414 (2021), Æon Flux (2005), Push (2009), The 6th Day (2000), Enemy Mine (1985), Ghosts of Mars (2001), Judge Dredd (1995), The Ice Pirates (1984), The Handmaid’s Tale (1990), City of Ember (2008), The Prototype (2022), Cyborg (1989), Paradise Hills (2019), Runaway (1984), Timecop (1994), Red Planet (2000), The Kid Who Would Be King (2019), Repo Men (2010), Double Dragon (1994), … (and many more)

(We have basically watched every “future” film released widely to theaters prior to 2000 according to this keyword except Virtuosity, Tank Girl, and The Ice Pirates. Virtuosity is the only real one left. Amazing we’ve left it so long.)

Welcome to Earf (HoE Number 17) – The shortest path through The Movie Database cast lists using only BMT films is: Forest Whitaker is No. 2 billed in Repo Men and No. 3 billed in Battlefield Earth, which also stars John Travolta (No. 1 billed) who is in Wild Hogs (No. 2 billed) which also stars Tim Allen (No. 1 billed) who is in Jungle 2 Jungle (No. 1 billed) which also stars Leelee Sobieski (No. 6 billed) who is in Here on Earth (No. 1 billed) => (2 + 3) + (1 + 2) + (1 + 1) + (6 + 1) = 17. If we were to watch Jakob the Liar, Jack, and The Glass House we can get the HoE Number down to 14.

Notes – Moments before the filming of the Chinatown scene a crew member was approached by a local Chinese person who pointed out to him that all the neon signs with Chinese characters were upside down. A frantic rigging crew proceeded to flip all the signs while the shooting crew shot in the direction of the newly flipped signs.

In a scene showing the city a Fast and Furious X billboard can be seen.

The young Remy (Jude Law) seen during the school yard fight was played by Jude Law’s actual son, Raff Law.

Forest Whitaker has been studying Filipino Kali for several years under masters such as Dan Inosanto and Richard Bustillo. He utilizes his skills in several fight scenes in the film.

Note that Jude Law’s character does not have a name (a similar situation in the book). The mystery effect was somewhat ruined when marketing inserted a name for him in the film’s first trailer.

To secure a product placement deal with Volkswagen, the production was required to feature one of their cars for 9 minutes.

When Jude Law and Forest Whitaker are watching TV the Monty Python sketch about organ repo men is on the TV.

The film takes place in 2025.

There’s a scene showing a sign for Jarvik St. It’s actually Jarvis St. in Toronto. Jarvik is the name of the man who created the first artificial heart.

It has been widely speculated that Repo Men’s premise was lifted heavily from the rock opera/cult movie “Repo! The Genetic Opera”. Both stories center around a character in a dystopian future tasked with reposessing organs for a villainous corporation. The opera predates this film as well as the book it was based on, “Repossession Mambo”. However, apart from this basic premise, Repo! and Repo Men differ wildly, making such plagiarism accusations difficult to substantiate.

Part of the film’s promotion was a seven minute comic released on Apple.com.

Men in Black II Recap

Jamie

This movie is good. Patrick?

Oh right, I should probably elaborate. This is the same movie as the first Men in Black, which is a good film. On rewatch I found the first film to be a lot weirder than I remembered. There was a strain of 90’s indie film in it mixed with the broad Will Smith action and Danny Elfman score. D’Onofrio is nuts and it’s not at all what you would expect from a Will Smith vehicle after Independence Day. I probably shouldn’t have worked a la Wild Wild West, but it did and we got a second film.

That second film is basically them finally getting the gang together after five years and running it back. Not exactly a way to get reviewers on your good side. But as far as I can tell that is pretty much the only reason this qualified for BMT. They looked at the film and said “we expect more from you Men in Black II.” It’s all expectations at this point. That is unless they got really hung up on Johnny Knoxville getting a role that was just too substantial for his talents at the time. He needed a bit more time to warm up and was pretty annoying. You could also nitpick the plot, but really you could probably say that about the first film too. Men in Black is all MacGuffins and aliens. So to all of a sudden be like “your MacGuffin and alien plot isn’t well thought out,” seems like a weak critique.

I feel like I’m going too strong on this. I’m not a big time MIB 2 fan or something. I’m not staking my reputation on this film. I’m not even sure what will happen come Smaddies Baddies time. I think my problem is that I was surprised to even see MIB 2 on the list of qualifying films. It’s right on the boundary. Usually those borderline films come out as just that: borderline BMT. This doesn’t even really feel borderline. Should have been a 50-60% RT score probably. It offends my BMT senses that we watched it.

I think if I were to do an in depth Wrong Analysis (patent pending) for this film I would go all in on the second film actually being better than the first. Here is my evidence:

  • Much improved special effects. You can accomplish a lot in five years, particularly when the five years run from 1997-2002 and special effects are making leaps and bounds by the day. But it’s not just the CGI I’m talking about. Even the puppet work is better. Case in point are the worms. They play a minor role in the first film, but by the time we are part of a smash hit they are all over the film and doing some real cool practical effects to bring them alive.
  • The best scene in the movie. Aliens in the locker is all you need to know. It’s great and nothing in any of the films beats it. So how can this be bad when that is so good?
  • They imply Tommy Lee Jones had sex with an alien. Strike that. They didn’t even really imply it. It seems pretty clear that Tommy Lee Jones had a love child with an alien.
  • It’s the same move as MIB with better effects, the best scene in the franchise, and the implication that Tommy Lee Jones is getting down with aliums on the regular. Case closed.

But that analysis is probably wrong. Patrick?

Patrick 

‘Ello everyone! Men in Black II? More like Men in Black Too … like as well. Because it is the same movie as the first one. Whatever, let’s go!

  • Much sillier than the first film I can see why it got relatively poor reviews.
  • BUT I also watched the first film, and while fun it is basically an exercise in how something novel can blind you to how poorly put together it is. Both films feel a bit like they are barely held together by Will Smith’s charisma alone.
  • Bar none this has the funniest scene in the entire franchise with the little weirdo aliens in the locker. The ending is the best part: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A9sd10CHAP8
  • This film suffers most in just feeling like a fun movie (J and K following clues around New York) bookended by the barest of all possible introductions and endings. The movie literally opens with an intentionally shoddy fake tv show (which they play again later to better effect) and then a really poorly done introduction to Serleena in Central Park. And then the film ends with a half-assed battle in MIBHQ stretched out to the twist ending.
  • And ultimately isn’t that the issue? They actually did have a MIB television show. I forgot about it, but they had a decently long running animated program (53 episodes). But the film feels like a television show that would exist now. A comedic version of The X-Files. Forcing it into a $100+ million budget blockbuster mold seems ultimately like a waste. And too bad, because you obviously can’t do anything with the original cast, and MIB: International was a colossal bomb, so they are kind of stuck.
  • Although it is a little funny to say that considering the Men in Black comic has six issues … total. Like there were only ever six issues of this property. If they work at it they could get more feature films than issues of the original source material. Bring back the MIB/21 Jump Street crossover! You know that would have been amazing.
  • There was a lot of product placement I’m sure, but my favorite Product Placement (What?) was when Rosario Dawson is asked to go get a whole mess of Mountain Dew from the basement (Do the Dew!). Solid Setting as a Character (Where?) for New York City which they use to excellent effect. Really incredible MacGuffin (Why?) work on the Light of Zartha. Which then rolls right into a Worst Twist (How?) for the reveal that Dawson herself is the Light of Zartha. Closest to Good, the film is undeniably fun to watch.

No sequel in the quiz this week, but I do outline my mid-credits scene / short film involving J going on a hot date. Check it out. Cheerios,

The Sklogs