Jamie
It actually makes me a little wistful thinking about things like Raise Your Voice. Hilary Duff occurred in a golden age of female teen pop actresses to the point where you could place her in a pyramid that goes from C-movies up to the A+ superstar. Mean Girls is Lindsey Lohan at her A+ peak. The Hottie and the Nottie is Paris Hilton at her C-movie F-minus nadir. Hilary Duff obviously falls somewhere near the top. I dream of going back to where there is so much demand that a sub-sub-genre like this can explore everything under the sun. A world where Here on Earth has a series of sequels in the HoECU. A world where The Mummy starring Tom Cruise has not just one sequel, but a whole Dark Universe. Is it weird that I went from Hilary Duff all the way back to The Mummy starring Tom Cruise? I don’t think so.
To recap, Hilary Duff is just a small town girl who loves to sing. She loves to perform for her family, but that means bupkis when it comes to whether she can be a star. So can she? Her brother thinks so. Just when it looks like she might be making it out of town her brother dies when a drunk driver hits him. The family is devastated and Hilary Duff puts her dreams on hold… that is until she finds out that she got into the big music program in LA she applied to. Her dad says no, but her mom says that she has to do this for herself and helps cover for her for the summer. Off Hilary Duff goes to the big city. She’s soon meeting all these amazing talented kids, but what about little ol’ her? Seems like she’s getting lost in the shuffle and just can’t find her voice. Her voice teacher sees something in her though and eventually reveals that it’s because with her applications came something unexpected: a video from her brother about how great she is (awww). The teacher is like “you don’t seem so great actually, so I guess your brother was a liar,” or something to that effect. Additionally she has the coolest boy in school (who also dated her arch nemesis last summer) into little ol’ her. Gulp. Will she be able to get things in her life sorted before the big show at the end of the year? You better believe it. With the help and support of her family she rocks out at the last show and… loses like a big ol’ loser. But that’s OK because it’s all about the frenemies we made along the way. THE END.
There is a movie that I like buried in the junk that is Raise Your Voice. The elevator pitch of this film is kind of my jam. Small town girl with all the talent in the world and star potential powered by her joy. Her brother dies and she just can’t jam out anymore until a teacher reveals that performance is communication and communication comes from the heart and the emotions she’s feeling don’t make her less of a star, but can actually be a source of strength. I’m tearing up just thinking about it. I’m tearing up for a different reason thinking about how they took that concept and turned it into some tween Disney bullshit about the rockinest boy in school maybe smooching little ol’ Hilary Duff. People talk about films insulting the intelligence of their audience and this is one of the best examples of that in BMT. I was insulted.
Hot Take Clam Bake! You know that brother that allegedly died in a car accident? We ever get to see a body on that one? Open that coffin Premonition style because unless his head pops out for everyone to see I’m not buying it. This is the long con. He knows that Hilary Duff doesn’t have the stuff to tough out the rough semester. Only through his death can she fulfill her destiny, so he obliges. It’s barely in frame, but in the background of the big performance you can see the brother peeking in from a window. He’s watching his grand plan come together. Either that or he’s a spooky ghost helping Hilary Duff (not) win the competition The 6th Man style. Hot Take Temperature: Jay Corgan.
Patrick?
Patrick
‘Ello everyone! Raise your voice! No seriously … I’ve had a terrible accident and now can barely hear the dulcet tones of Hilary Duff. Let’s go!
Top Line: I’ve told this story before, right? Long ago, in a hometown far far away, Jamie and I lived and went to high school. In high school, there were two lady friends who would make us watch ridiculous movies which we hated! (or so they thought, we secretly loved them and it would become one of the seeds from which BMT would be born). Grind?! Blech (we would say as we popped in the VHS tape for the 7th time). Well, one day Jamie was off … doing whatever. And I didn’t have anything to do. These two ladies were like “come see a movie” and I was like “sure what’s the worst that could happen?” But then egad! It was Raise Your Voice! And the lady friends both fell asleep within the first 10 minutes of the film leaving Patrick stewing in an empty theater watching a movie that just sucked (and not like Grind!). I couldn’t just leave because they were my ride! What a disaster. I’ve held that experience as a pithy anecdote to trot out at parties ever since. Everyone loves it, I assume. The End.
Anyways, yeah, I’ve never seen that film again … until now!
So how was it? Uh … not good. The acting is horrid (except maybe Kat Dennings which for whatever reason I always think is pretty good in a mumbly sort of way), and the story is bland.
Bland?! Well … yeah, the guy from Sex in the City doesn’t even have inappropriate relationships with anyone! To be clear, I don’t want that to happen, but where is the drama? He’s just like a normal good teacher character?
The evil girl isn’t even really evil, it isn’t like she tries to ruin the performance at the end. If anything it is just Hilary Duff herself who attempts to sabotage herself by being a saddo.
And worst of all? The accident in the beginning (on a clear stroad, the most dangerous of all infrastructure), doesn’t even make sense. He is making a left turn onto a side street and then he’s T-boned on the driver’s side? Was this drunk driver going the wrong way down this stroad? Get the fudge out of here! What a goof!
Anyways, I suppose we all learn a valuable lesson: if you are naturally an incredibly talented singer you should go to LA and hang at a summer camp for free and win scholarships and junk. The End.
Also even if your brother died literally just a few weeks ago, don’t be a big old saddo. No one likes a saddo.
You best belieb we have a major Product Placement (What?) alert for Sobe (and Three Days Grace? Maybe). A very very Setting as a Character (Where?) film for LA. And while I secretly love how cheesy this film is, I still think this falls just into the Bad category for being boring and bland, it needed more drama to push it over the top.
Read all about my spin off Disney series in the Quiz. Cheerios,
The Sklogs
Bad Movie Twins 