And by back-up plan he means bringing “back up” all the points he was already making (and more). Soon Jamie is back in the courtroom, having cited Resolution 4125 from 1933, whereby Hallston established that jury members had the right to cross examine witnesses. The entire third grade classroom of Dark Territory Elementary is shown a super rad video of Jamie himself performing samurai moves with his sword and then asked simple memory-based questions. They all fail. The teacher intervenes. “But sir, I was not distracted by the rad/horrifying nature of the murder,” she insists. Jamie scoffs. He measures out 300 yards between the teacher and the accused and asks for identification. No problem. He then stands, shirtless, next to the young man. The teacher’s eyes widen and a murmur can be heard from the gallery. The teacher has to admit, “It’s uncanny. I can’t tell the difference.” Three more of the witnesses give him a thumbs up. It’s now 9-3 for ‘not guilty.’ Suddenly, a hubbub can be heard in the back of the room. Ms. LaRouche’s boss, Mr. Duckworth, is loudly whispering and making dramatic hand gestures at her. “I demand to know what is going on here. I understand we want to set this young man free, but do we need this… this…” They hear him hiss, pointing at Jamie, “riff raff being the one doing it? We’ll never work in this town again!” Ms. LaRouche is trying to calm him down, but the damage is done. The jury can now smell blood in the water. They must be on the right track when even the big wig defense lawyers are getting cold feet. Two more votes change. Just one more hold out… Wrestlemania. “Thank you, Mr. Duckworth,” Jamie says softly and Ms. LaRouche smiles slyly. That’s right! Thank you, indeed, Mr. Ducksworth. Without you forcing Gordon Bombay into coaching hockey, we wouldn’t get to watch all three for BMT. Let’s go!
The Mighty Ducks (1992) – BMeTric: 16.3; Notability: 50
StreetCreditReport.com – BMeTric: top 20.4%; Notability: top 5.2%; Rotten Tomatoes: top 15.3%; Higher BMeT: Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot (22), Honey, I Blew Up the Kid (47), Cool World (58), Pet Sematary II (29), Children of the Corn II: The Final Sacrifice (34), Toys (56), 3 Ninjas (60), Sleepwalkers (54), Hellraiser III: Hell on Earth (42), Poison Ivy (37), Freejack (29), Evil Toons (19), Sidekicks (101), Aces: Iron Eagle III (54), Beethoven (18), Tom and Jerry: The Movie (1), Buffy the Vampire Slayer (44), Christopher Columbus: The Discovery (27), Dr. Giggles (14), Encino Man (59), and 31 more; Higher Notability: Home Alone 2: Lost in New York, Toys, Cool World, Newsies, The Bodyguard, Honey, I Blew Up the Kid, Tom and Jerry: The Movie, Freejack, Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot, Memoirs of an Invisible Man, Universal Soldier, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Innocent Blood; Lower RT: Once Upon a Crime…, Live Wire, Folks!, Year of the Comet, Love Crimes, Frozen Assets, Cool World, Man Trouble, The Opposite Sex and How to Live with Them, Christopher Columbus: The Discovery, Passed Away, Mr. Baseball, Mom and Dad Save the World, The Distinguished Gentleman, Ladybugs, Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot, Tom and Jerry: The Movie, Aces: Iron Eagle III, The Gun in Betty Lou’s Handbag, Mo’ Money, and 16 more; Notes: Sidekicks is incredible. A League of Their Own, A River Runs Through It, and the somewhat odd film Hero are the only others which breaks the 100 plays from 1992. But Sidekicks?! Man, Chuck Norris had some juice! We’ve only seen 7 of those top 20 by BMeTric which is somewhat unimpressive. Quite surprising.
Leonard Maltin – 2 Stars – Harmless, cliched Disney yarn of self-centered yuppie lawyer Estevez who’s busted for drunk-driving, ordered to do community service, and assigned to coach a ragtag inner-city peewee hockey team. Guess what happens next. (Anaheim-based pro hockey team was formed by Disney in 1993 called … you guessed it.) Followed by D2: The Mighty Ducks, D3: The Mighty Ducks, an animated series, and a TVM based on that series.
(Oh yeah, there was a movie based on the show. It has 700 votes on IMDb, so not exactly tearing it up. And bullshit, it isn’t even a real movie. It is just the first three episodes of the show! Maltin, you have to do better man.)
Trailer – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Um_JU7HpSYQ/
(Ha, the quality of this trailer is insane. I assume it was ripped off of a VHS. Even then … reducing it to 720x480ish it still is completely ridiculous looking. Oh the trailer? Looks fun as fuck.)
Directors – Stephen Herek – ( Known For: Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure; Rock Star; Mr. Holland’s Opus; Critters; Our Little Secret; Afterlife of the Party; Dog Gone; The Chaperone; The Great Gilly Hopkins; Future BMT: 101 Dalmatians; The Three Musketeers; Don’t Tell Mom the Babysitter’s Dead; Life or Something Like It; Man of the House; Holy Man; BMT: The Mighty Ducks; Notes: Still directs. He was a producer and director on the MacGyver reboot, which seems to have kept him busy.)
Writers – Steven Brill – ( Known For: Walk of Shame; Heavyweights; Future BMT: Ready to Rumble; BMT: Little Nicky; The Mighty Ducks; D2: The Mighty Ducks; D3: The Mighty Ducks; Notes: I don’t know how, but somehow he got hooked into the Sandler machine prior to Little Nicky in bit parts, and then wrote Little Nicky and has continued to act a bit in random Sandler films.)
Actors – Emilio Estevez – ( Known For: Mission: Impossible; The Breakfast Club; The Outsiders; Badlands; Young Guns; St. Elmo’s Fire; Bobby; Repo Man; The Way; Stakeout; Brats; The Public; Wisdom; The War at Home; Tex; Never on Tuesday; The L.A. Riot Spectacular; Sand; Future BMT: Loaded Weapon 1; Arthur and the Invisibles; Men at Work; Judgment Night; Another Stakeout; Nightmares; That Was Then… This Is Now; BMT: The Mighty Ducks; D2: The Mighty Ducks; D3: The Mighty Ducks; Young Guns II; Maximum Overdrive; Freejack; Notes: Mostly directs now, and apparently is planning on directing a third Young Guns film? Not sure how that’s going to work.)
Joss Ackland – ( Known For: The Hunt for Red October; Lethal Weapon 2; Bill & Ted’s Bogus Journey; K-19: The Widowmaker; Miracle on 34th Street; Watership Down; Flawless; The Three Musketeers; The Four Musketeers: Milady’s Revenge; The House That Dripped Blood; Surviving Picasso; No Good Deed; A Zed & Two Noughts; Lady Jane; The Sicilian; Asylum; Firelight; The Thief and the Cobbler; The Little Prince; Mother’s Boys; Future BMT: Nowhere to Run; My Giant; A Kid in King Arthur’s Court; Once Upon a Crime…; BMT: The Mighty Ducks; D3: The Mighty Ducks; Notes: I randomly watched The Hunt for Red October and Lethal Weapon 2 pretty much back to back and I did a double take. He probably has the best villain in any Lethal Weapon film.)
Lane Smith – ( Known For: Network; My Cousin Vinny; Red Dawn; The Legend of Bagger Vance; Places in the Heart; Rooster Cogburn; Blue Collar; Prince of the City; Frances; Over the Edge; Prison; The Hi-Lo Country; The Bad News Bears in Breaking Training; Resurrection; The Last American Hero; Honeysuckle Rose; Between the Lines; Night Game; Purple Hearts; Weeds; Future BMT: Air America; Son in Law; The Distinguished Gentleman; The Scout; BMT: The Mighty Ducks; Notes: Died in 2005. Apparently he sang songs on the Lois & Clark tv show in the 90s? Something tells me that is maybe a fake credit. There is no mention of this on Wikipedia. Maybe he just sang a song in the show or something.)
Budget/Gross – $10,000,000 / Domestic: $50,752,337 (Worldwide: $50,755,845)
(And that is how a phenomenon is born. Sigh, where have all the $10 million films gone. For real, look at this film … looks at how many actors are there. Half of them become like actually famous actors when they grow up. How do you make this for $10 million? The ice time alone!)
Rotten Tomatoes – 27% (8/30): The Mighty Ducks has feel-good goals but only scores a penalty shot for predictability.
(Booooooooooooooooooooooo. This is a good movie. These days if this film was released people’s heads would explode. It would get like 90% on RT and top the Netflix charts.)
Reviewer Highlight: It must be said that this movie is sweet and innocent, and that at a certain level it might appeal to younger kids. I doubt if its ambitions reach much beyond that. – Roger Ebert, Chicago Sun-Times
Poster – The Mighty Mighty Bosstones
(They really cannot quit Goldberg. I don’t blame them. Chunky kids were my jam in kid’s comedy. Ham from The Sandlot. Larry from The Big Green. Zach from Son-in-law. I like the creativity with the poster. Very modern too. Extreme closeups are very common now. Font is nice with the speed streaks. I’m not in love with it, but I also don’t hate it. B-.)
Tagline(s) – He’s never coached. They’ve never won. Together they’ll learn everything about winning! (D)
(My word. No! Won and winning? You kidding?)
Keyword(s) – top BMeT
Top 10: Fifty Shades of Grey (2015), The Twilight Saga: New Moon (2009), Green Lantern (2011), Batman & Robin (1997), Batman Forever (1995), The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn – Part 1 (2011), Ghost Rider (2007), The Happening (2008), A Good Day to Die Hard (2013), The Mummy (2017)
Future BMT: 96.3 Disaster Movie (2008), 93.6 Date Movie (2006), 90.7 Vampires Suck (2010), 90.1 House of the Dead (2003), 89.0 BloodRayne (2005), 87.9 Winnie-the-Pooh: Blood and Honey (2023), 86.9 Street Fighter (1994), 86.6 The Adventures of Sharkboy and Lavagirl 3-D (2005), 84.1 Spy Kids 4: All the Time in the World (2011), 83.1 Inspector Gadget (1999), 81.5 You Got Served (2004), 80.0 Jonas Brothers: The 3D Concert Experience (2009), 80.0 Jeepers Creepers III (2017), 79.5 Daddy Day Camp (2007), 79.4 Home Alone 3 (1997), 79.3 Boogeyman (2005), 78.7 Shark Night (2011), 78.2 The Oogieloves in the Big Balloon Adventure (2012), 78.1 Who’s Your Caddy? (2007), 78.0 Jeepers Creepers: Reborn (2022)
BMT: Epic Movie (2007), Meet the Spartans (2008), Battlefield Earth (2000), Dragonball Evolution (2009), Catwoman (2004), Jack and Jill (2011), Batman & Robin (1997), Son of the Mask (2005), The Room (2003), The Emoji Movie (2017), Cats (2019), Gigli (2003), Scary Movie V (2013), Alone in the Dark (2005), Jaws: The Revenge (1987), The Last Airbender (2010), Mortal Kombat: Annihilation (1997), The Wicker Man (2006), Manos: The Hands of Fate (1966), Madame Web (2024), Superman IV: The Quest for Peace (1987), Fifty Shades of Grey (2015), Speed 2: Cruise Control (1997), Slender Man (2018), Dumb and Dumberer: When Harry Met Lloyd (2003), Jaws 3-D (1983), Troll 2 (1990), The Love Guru (2008), Superbabies: Baby Geniuses 2 (2004), In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale (2007), The Cat in the Hat (2003), The Avengers (1998), Crossroads (2002), Halloween: Resurrection (2002), The Fog (2005), Fantastic Four (2015), Rollerball (2002), Baby Geniuses (1999), Spice World (1997), From Justin to Kelly (2003), Dungeons & Dragons (2000), Norbit (2007), …
Best Options (franchise): 89.0 BloodRayne (2005), 84.1 Spy Kids 4: All the Time in the World (2011), 81.5 You Got Served (2004), 80.0 Jeepers Creepers III (2017), 79.5 Daddy Day Camp (2007), 79.4 Home Alone 3 (1997), 79.3 Boogeyman (2005), 78.0 Jeepers Creepers: Reborn (2022), 77.9 Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chipwrecked (2011), 76.0 Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakquel (2009), 75.5 Look Who’s Talking Now (1993), 75.3 The Grudge (2019), 74.8 Paranormal Activity 4 (2012), 74.6 God’s Not Dead (2014), 72.7 Look Who’s Talking Too (1990), 72.6 The Next Karate Kid (1994), 72.3 Legally Blonde 2: Red, White & Blonde (2003), 71.6 Paranormal Activity: The Ghost Dimension (2015), 71.1 Texas Chainsaw (2013), 69.5 The Santa Clause 3: The Escape Clause (2006), 69.4 Black Christmas (2006), 69.3 Pulse (2006), 68.2 The Crow: City of Angels (1996), 68.1 Smokey and the Bandit Part 3 (1983), 67.7 Seed of Chucky (2004), 67.4 Turbo: A Power Rangers Movie (1997), 66.9 God’s Not Dead 2 (2016), 65.1 Scary Movie 4 (2006), 64.9 The Final Destination (2009), 64.8 Blair Witch (2016), 64.4 Van Wilder: The Rise of Taj (2006), 64.2 Diary of a Wimpy Kid: The Long Haul (2017), 62.2 The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor (2008), 61.8 The Grudge 2 (2006), 61.8 Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Road Chip (2015), 61.3 Madea Goes to Jail (2009), 61.2 Beethoven’s 2nd (1993), 61.2 Paranormal Activity: The Marked Ones (2014), 60.7 The Mangler (1995), 60.4 Exorcist: The Beginning (2004), 60.2 Children of the Corn II: The Final Sacrifice (1992), 60.1 Spiral (2021)
(Well yeah … because these are good films. We could have done an actual bad film for this, but what’s the fun in that? I think if I were to pick a franchise to smash here it would have been Karate Kid. The back two are genuine stinkers. Hot take: The second one sucks too, it is so dumb.)
Welcome to Earf (HoE Number 18) – The shortest path through The Movie Database cast lists using only BMT films is: Emilio Estevez is No. 1 billed in The Mighty Ducks and No. 1 billed in Young Guns II: Blaze of Glory, which also stars Christian Slater (No. 4 billed) who is in Mindhunters (No. 4 billed) which also stars LL Cool J (No. 3 billed) who is in Rollerball (No. 2 billed) which also stars Chris Klein (No. 1 billed) who is in Here on Earth (No. 2 billed) => (1 + 1) + (4 + 4) + (3 + 2) + (1 + 2) = 18. If we were to watch Judgment Night we can get the HoE Number down to 14.
Notes – Jake Gyllenhaal, who was unknown at the time, auditioned for the role of Charlie Conway, but his parents wouldn’t let him do the movie so the producers ended up casting Joshua Jackson.
Before Emilio Estevez was offered and accepted the role of Gordon Bombay, Charlie Sheen, his brother, was offered the role, but turned it down.
Leonardo DiCaprio auditioned for the part of Charlie Conway but lost out to Joshua Jackson. In similar fashion, Juliette Lewis tried out for the part of Connie, but lost out to Marguerite Moreau.
The original premise of Mighty Ducks was much darker with very little comedy about an ex-NHL player turned alcoholic who seeks revenge on his old coach by coaching opposite him. The main idea stayed when Disney bought the rights to the movie, but some elements were changed (such as Bombay is now a lawyer, who never played in the NHL, who must do community service for a DUI), including much more emphasis on comedy and downplaying most of the adult themes.
Vincent LaRusso wasn’t given the role of Adam Banks initially, but later it was given to him when the child who originally played Banks became too difficult to work with.
Bad Movie Twins 