Ridiculous Six… *shudders*… Patrick?
‘Ello everyone. Ridiculous Six? More like Ridiculous that we watched this non-movie! Ayyyyyyoooooooo. Unfinished Business tried to ruin my Tgivs, and this one tried to ruin my Christmas. I will overcome. I will persevere. Let’s get into it:
- We had some walkouts! Watching with the Fam to start they quickly fled in a panic. Is this what we do with our lives? Is this what I have been allowed to become?! Sadly yes, I “watched” the whole thing. If putting my brain into Windows sleep mode while pointing my eyes vaguely in the direction of the television counts as watching something.
- The dialogue! Does a movie have a script if it seems like nothing is written down? The movie starts with Adam Sandler deadpanning a list of groceries to a backwoods trader as I quietly breathed “oh God, what hath we wrought upon our beautiful BMT”. There are exactly two good jokes in the movie, and they aren’t even funny.
- I don’t know … the movie seems like it cost a lost of money. You’d think someone would be in charge of making sure a somewhat funny movie was made. But just… like Vanilla Ice Mark Twain and a uncontrollably shitting donkey (sorry, burro … sigh) just, why?
- That’s it, I can’t do any more, this movie was bad. I’m going to say it: straight dog poo in my face. Or caca de perro en mi cara according to Rob Schnieder’s totally not racist Mexican caricature.
Welp, there it is. We did it. We did a Netflix Original. Hopefully this is the first and last, because I like Netflix. Although, I am very curious about what is happening in this Crouching Tiger trailer with the music?
I feel like there is an interesting story there. I’ll just leave it there, no game this time.