sequel – Page 3 – Bad Movie Twins

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III Preview

Jamie and Patrick look over the bustling BMF HQ. With the help of Scott Bakula’s international name recognition they’re back and better than ever. Kyle comes up and hands them the latest article for the site: Yes We Manne-Can, The Best Mannequin Films of 2015-2025. It’s brilliant. “I’m just glad I can help out, considering that it was not long ago that I was running BMT and you were trying to figure out how to be good.” Jamie and Patrick laugh a little. “And to think,” Jamie says softly with a smirk, “it was here all along. Family is good.” They triple bro hug. Everything has been coming up Jamie and Patrick since they kicked Kevin James’ head clean off. “Patrick?” Jamie says thoughtfully, “do you ever wish we hadn’t kicked Kevin James’ head clean off?” You can see Patrick turn the question over in his head. A moment of clarity crosses his face as it finally dawns on him exactly what they did that fateful day. He opens his mouth, struggling to express the myriad of emotions he is feeling, “No. No I don’t.” Kyle and Jamie exhale in relief. They triple bro hug again and the whole company erupts in cheers at the beautiful expression of family love, which represents the majesty of Bad Movie Family. They cheers with cans of Bud Light. As Patrick takes a deep draught he is left with a glowing green beer-stache. “Woah, what’s that?” Kyle says and grabs at Patrick’s can. It’s filled with a thick green liquid. “Oh, yeah, it’s just a little thing I invented. I call it Ooze.” Kyle takes a drink and his eyes go wide. “It’s like Mountain Dew flavored Bud Light. It’s… amazing. What’s the secret?” Patrick eyes Jamie. Is he thinking what he’s thinking? That’s right! We are getting a blast from the past with the original Justice League, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Both The Secret of the Ooze and Turtles in Time qualify, but you better believe I’ll also be watching the original. TMNT4Life! Let’s go!

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III (1993) – BMeTric: 67.7; Notability: 46

StreetCreditReport.com – BMeTric: top 1.6%; Notability: top 9.6%; Rotten Tomatoes: top 12.6%; Higher BMeT: Super Mario Bros., RoboCop 3, Jason Goes to Hell: The Final Friday, Look Who’s Talking Now; Higher Notability: Last Action Hero, Hocus Pocus, Sister Act 2: Back in the Habit, The Meteor Man, Coneheads, RoboCop 3, We’re Back! A Dinosaur’s Story, Rising Sun, The Three Musketeers, Life with Mikey, Son of the Pink Panther, Loaded Weapon 1, Super Mario Bros., Indecent Proposal, Once Upon a Forest, Made in America, Look Who’s Talking Now, Sliver, Josh and S.A.M., Dennis the Menace, and 4 more; Lower RT: Look Who’s Talking Now, Deadfall, Warlock: The Armageddon, Golden Gate, Son of the Pink Panther, RoboCop 3, Mr. Nanny, Hexed, Weekend at Bernie’s II, Ghost in the Machine, Best of the Best II, Father Hood, Carnosaur, Surf Ninjas, Pumpkinhead II: Blood Wings, My Boyfriend’s Back, Only the Strong, Cop & ½, Sliver, Gunmen, and 10 more; Notes: In my child brain from 1993 I always had the impression that this was like … not released to theaters. But really, I was just too young at the time to go to theaters. Incredibly this played 56 times on television. Last Action Hero: 110. Hocus Pocus: 60. Sister Act 2: Back in the Habit: 38. Given that Hocus Pocus was on constantly (albeit once a year mostly) this must have been huuuuuge.

Leonard Maltin – 2 stars – The guys bolt the sewer for feudal Japan to help rebel villagers conquer an evil lord. Seven Samurai it ain’t (nor Russ Meyer’s The Seven Minutes either), but those who still care will find a more mellowed-out Turtles saga, complete with lecture by Raphael on the dangers of violence. Like totally Woodstock, dude!

(The ending line is something else. I do find it interesting that Ebert gave the prior installment 1 star, and Maltin gave that one 1.5 as well. So he genuinely seems to find the third to be better than the second, counter to the rest of the critical reception.)

Trailer – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w2dNvVdz3js/

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w2dNvVdz3js/

(What a goddamn needle drop after like 20 seconds of dancing around the fact that this is a TMNT film. Demented that they went for the time travel storyline in the third film though. Didn’t even get to do Krang.)

Directors – Stuart Gillard – ( Known For: Kart Racer; A Man Called Sarge; Future BMT: Paradise; RocketMan; BMT: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III; Notes: Nominated for an Emmy for the Sonny and Cher Show in 1976. He’s a pretty huge producer for television these days, most recently for So Help Me Todd.)

Writers – Kevin Eastman and Peter Laird – ( Known For: The Lego Movie; Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles; Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: The Movie; Heavy Metal 2000; Future BMT: TMNT; BMT: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles; Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze; Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III; Notes: By all accounts this story is pretty much ripped from the pages of an actual TMNT comic, so them getting credits is more that sensical.)

Stuart Gillard – ( Known For: If You Could See What I Hear; Spring Fever; A Man Called Sarge; Future BMT: Paradise; BMT: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III; Notes: This basically ended his writing career? He wrote Mega Piranha a little after. A Man Called Sarge? 500 votes on IMDb, and played 24 times in the 90s.)

Actors – Elias Koteas – ( Known For: Shooter; Shutter Island; Zodiac; Now You See Me; The Curious Case of Benjamin Button; Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles; The Thin Red Line; Crash; My Days of Mercy; Gattaca; Fallen; Let Me In; Some Kind of Wonderful; The Last Days on Mars; Apt Pupil; Exotica; The Greatest Game Ever Played; The Prophecy; The Killer Inside Me; She’s Having a Baby; Future BMT: The Fourth Kind; Collateral Damage; Dream House; Skinwalkers; Look Who’s Talking Too; Desperate Hours; Almost an Angel; Lost Souls; BMT: The Haunting in Connecticut; Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III; Devil’s Knot; Notes: Became a pretty big TV star in the 2000s. 100 episodes of Chicago P.D. Was on the somewhat resurgent fourth season of The Killing. Character actor throughout the 90s.)

Paige Turco – ( Known For: Invincible; Books of Blood; Urbania; The Pompatus of Love; Rhinoceros Eyes; The Favor; Dead Funny; Future BMT: The Stepfather; BMT: The Game Plan; Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze; Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III; Notes: Was originally a dancer until an injury ended the possibility of that being a career. Got this part because the previous April O’Neil basically quit.)

Stuart Wilson – ( Known For: The Rock; Hot Fuzz; Vertical Limit; Enemy of the State; The Mask of Zorro; The Age of Innocence; Grindhouse; Lethal Weapon 3; No Escape; Death and the Maiden; Fascination; Unstoppable; Wetherby; Dulcima; The Luzhin Defence; The Prisoner of Zenda; Perfect Creature; Edie & Pen; Fool’s Mate; BMT: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III; Exit to Eden; Here on Earth; Notes: Was a big British theater actor in the 70s and 80s. Then started getting parts in British television in the 80s. And then because a villain (basically) in 90s in films like Lethal Weapon 3.)

Budget/Gross – $21,000,000 / Domestic: $42,273,609 (Worldwide: $42,273,609)

(Yeah that is basically a wash for a film like this back in the day. It would have been banking on home video to give them the real bang for their buck. But they ended up converting the fourth film to television, which also makes sense.)

Rotten Tomatoes – 19% (6/32): It’s a case of one sequel too many for the heroes in a half shell, with a tired time-travel plot gimmick failing to save the franchise from rapidly diminishing returns.

(Yeah, the time travel bit I remember not being impressed with, even as a seven year old. Very tired, and a fairly obvious ploy to get kids to buy different toys with different costumes.)

NY Times Short Review: Fighting Samurai dynasties. Less violent, more scenic.

Poster – TMNT III: Turtle Time Through Time

(No one can seriously come in here and tell you that this isn’t a very cool poster. It’s so cool that I wondered “who made this?” and when I found out it was Morgan Weistling I thought “wait, haven’t I talked about him before?” The answer is yes. I talked about him while raving about the Police Academy posters. A.)

Tagline(s) – Ancient Japan, 1593. Without a map. Without a clue. Without a pizza. (B-)

(Give me dat year. Right on the poster. Nice. It’s a little long, but once you get past the setting you get a nice Rule of Three and it’s fun in a slightly nonsensical way.)

Keyword(s) – wisdom

Top 10: The Dark Knight (2008), Inception (2010), Forrest Gump (1994), The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring (2001), The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King (2003), The Dark Knight Rises (2012), The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers (2002), Batman Begins (2005), Inglourious Basterds (2009), The Silence of the Lambs (1991)

Future BMT: 88.6 Dumb and Dumberer: When Harry Met Lloyd (2003), 84.0 Prom Night (2008), 83.6 Spy Kids 4: All the Time in the World (2011), 82.2 You Got Served (2004), 80.0 Jonas Brothers: The 3D Concert Experience (2009), 79.6 Nutty Professor II: The Klumps (2000), 78.8 Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chipwrecked (2011), 77.6 Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakquel (2009), 77.2 Superhero Movie (2008), 72.3 Bewitched (2005), 71.4 The Animal (2001), 69.4 College Road Trip (2008), 68.9 Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen (2004), 68.5 Poltergeist (2015), 68.2 Yogi Bear (2010), 65.7 Halloween Ends (2022), 65.6 The Haunting of Molly Hartley (2008), 65.3 Fat Albert (2004), 65.0 Scary Movie 4 (2006), 64.7 The Grudge 2 (2006)

BMT: Batman & Robin (1997), The Emoji Movie (2017), The Last Airbender (2010), Fifty Shades of Grey (2015), The Cat in the Hat (2003), Crossroads (2002), Norbit (2007), Fantastic Four (2015), From Justin to Kelly (2003), The Master of Disguise (2002), Book of Shadows: Blair Witch 2 (2000), Sex and the City 2 (2010), Space Jam: A New Legacy (2021), xXx: State of the Union (2005), Aliens vs. Predator: Requiem (2007), Fifty Shades Freed (2018), Little Man (2006), Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2 (2015), Taxi (2004), The Twilight Saga: New Moon (2009), Freddy Got Fingered (2001), I Still Know What You Did Last Summer (1998), Zoolander 2 (2016), Kangaroo Jack (2003), Are We Done Yet? (2007), Police Academy 5: Assignment: Miami Beach (1988), The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn – Part 1 (2011), The Boy Next Door (2015), Wild Wild West (1999), Urban Legends: Final Cut (2000), Year One (2009), Are We There Yet? (2005), Marmaduke (2010), Big Momma’s House 2 (2006), The Roommate (2011), Tammy (2014), Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III (1993), … (and many more)

Best Options (daddio): 67.6 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III (1993), 46.3 Daddy Day Care (2003)

(There is it. It is pretty funny how few options we had. Although I did learn that I didn’t include films nominated for an actor’s performance (like Whoopi Goldberg for Eddie, so there was probably actually tons of options).)

Welcome to Earf (HoE Number 12) – The shortest path through The Movie Database cast lists using only BMT films is: Stuart Wilson is No. 3 billed in Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III and No. 9 billed in Here on Earth, => (3 + 9) = 12. There is no shorter path at the moment.

Notes – Starting in this film, All Effects Company took over and worked on the animatronic effects for the turtles and Splinter costumes. Jim Henson’s Creature Shop was the company who worked on the mutant creatures in the previous two movies.

Producers invited Corey Feldman to reprise his role from the first film as Donatello. The filmmakers told Corey they felt bad about not casting him for Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze (1991). However, when Corey asked for more money than the $1500 he was paid on Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1990), Corey was told, “yeah, but you were in rehab.” Corey was denied the raise, and was again paid only $1500.

This film was originally going to be followed by a fourth installment in the franchise, “TMNT: The Next Mutation.” In this concept, the Ooze that transformed the Turtles and Splinter was still in their bodies, causing a much more drastic second mutation. Another plan that was discussed was to add a fifth turtle named Kirby (named after comic artist Jack Kirby). However, the project got stuck in development and plans for a fourth theatrical live action movie fell apart. The concept of having the Turtles mutate into creatures did see the light of day in the ‘New Mutation’ saga of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1987) cartoon. Later, the live action “Next Mutation” installment moved to television in a live-action series produced by Saban, titled Ninja Turtles: The Next Mutation (1997). This series delivered on the promise of a fifth turtle, but changed it to a female turtle named Venus De Milo.

Mark Caso (The performer inside the Leonardo costume), is the only cast to return from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze (1991). Brian Tochi (The voice of Leonardo) and Robbie Rist (The voice of Michaelangelo) are the only actors who appeared in all three movies in the trilogy. Corey Feldman who appeared in Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1990) makes his return as the voice of Donatello.

The concept for this movie is loosely based on a story called “Masks” from issues #46 and #47 of the original Mirage comics. The story features the Turtles and Renet traveling back to Feudal Japan to fight an evil shogun and engage in samurai battles.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze Preview

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze (1991) – BMeTric: 32.3; Notability: 52

StreetCreditReport.com – BMeTric: top 9.2%; Notability: top 2.8%; Rotten Tomatoes: top 25.8%; Higher BMeT: Freddy’s Dead: The Final Nightmare, Cool as Ice, Critters 3, Problem Child 2, Child’s Play 3, Suburban Commando, Nothing But Trouble, Return to the Blue Lagoon, Mannequin: On the Move, Kickboxer 2: The Road Back, Zandalee, King Ralph, Double Impact, Beastmaster 2: Through the Portal of Time, Hudson Hawk, V.I. Warshawski, The Butcher’s Wife, House Party 2, Curly Sue, Ernest Scared Stupid, and 3 more; Higher Notability: Hook, Hudson Hawk, Mobsters, Flight of the Intruder, Switch, Rock-A-Doodle, Life Stinks; Lower RT: Return to the Blue Lagoon, Critters 3, The Super, Run, Cool as Ice, Another You, All I Want for Christmas, Problem Child 2, Mobsters, The Marrying Man, Strictly Business, Drop Dead Fred, Oscar, Nothing But Trouble, The Hitman, Mannequin: On the Move, Curly Sue, One Good Cop, Suburban Commando, Pure Luck, and 41 more; Notes: We are going to get to Hook, I promise you that. I have no idea what Mobsters is … played 14 times in the 90s. This played 45 times which is pretty decent. Rock-a-Doodle played a gaudy 56 times. Gives you an idea of that metric.

RogerEbert.com – 1.0 stars – I bent over backwards to be fair to the first movie about the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. It was, I wrote, “probably the best possible Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle movie.” Now we have the sequel, subtitled “The Secret of the Ooze.” I may not get what I want, but I get what I deserve. … I liked the older superheroes better. The ones that stood out from a crowd, had their own opinions, were not afraid of ridicule, and symbolized a future of truth and justice. Spiderman and Superman represented democratic values. Today’s kids are learning from the Turtles that the world is a sinkhole of radioactive waste, that it’s more reassuring to huddle together in sewers than take your chances competing at street level, and that individuality is dangerous. Cowabunga.

(Haha, so righteous Ebert. Here’s the thing. TMNT was rad. Like the coolest shit in the world when I was what? Six years old. I had a birthday party at the candlepin bowling alley and got basically all of the toys. Wait … is that enough information to pinpoint my identity.)

Trailer – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=al9jfY7zOBY/

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=al9jfY7zOBY/

(My god, this what … TV spot? The sound effects are off the chain. Them being clearly very resistant to showing the bad mutants is kind of charming. And yes, off course the Ninja Rap has to take center stage,)

Directors – Michael Pressman – ( Known For: The Bad News Bears in Breaking Training; The Great Texas Dynamite Chase; Some Kind of Hero; Boulevard Nights; Those Lips, Those Eyes; Frankie and Johnny Are Married; Future BMT: Doctor Detroit; To Gillian on Her 37th Birthday; BMT: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze; Notes: )

Writers – Kevin Eastman and Peter Laird – ( Known For: The Lego Movie; Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles; Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: The Movie; Heavy Metal 2000; Future BMT: TMNT; BMT: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles; Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze; Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III; Notes: Clearly the TMNT comic book creators. Was a play off of Daredevil originally all the way down to their enemies being The Foot (instead of The Hand) and their master being Splinter instead of Stick. Both heroes were created from the same ooze spill in the comics as well.)

Todd W. Langen – (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles; BMT: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze; Notes: Was a writer on the Wonder Years, and then wrote both of these films.)

Actors – Paige Turco – ( Known For: Invincible; Books of Blood; Urbania; The Pompatus of Love; Rhinoceros Eyes; The Favor; Dead Funny; Future BMT: The Stepfather; BMT: The Game Plan; Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze; Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III; Notes: Was in 85 episodes of The 100 recently. She plays April, which is, indeed, the main character who actually is physically on screen at any point.)

David Warner – ( Known For: Titanic; Scream 2; The Man with Two Brains; Planet of the Apes; Tron; Mary Poppins Returns; The Omen; Time Bandits; In the Mouth of Madness; Straw Dogs; Black Death; Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country; Mortal Passions; Time After Time; Tom Jones; The French Lieutenant’s Woman; The Company of Wolves; Cross of Iron; The Concorde… Airport ’79; Necronomicon: Book of Dead; Future BMT: Money Talks; BMT: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze; Star Trek V: The Final Frontier; Wing Commander; Notes: Was nominated for two Emmys in late-70s/early-80s and won for Masada in 1981. He plays the scientist in this who creates the ooze. I hope he had a ball.)

Michelan Sisti – ( Known For: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles; The Muppets; BMT: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze; Notes: Here is the only actual turtle to get into the top three credits. He plays Mikey. But like … in the suit, not the voice, which is hilarious. That was Robbie Rist.)

Budget/Gross – $25,000,000 / Domestic: $78,656,813 (Worldwide: $78,656,813)

(Absolutely solid. No wonder they thought “we need to take this on tour” and then make a few more movies, and make a tv show, etc. etc. etc. And now a new movie is coming out. I hope it is good.)

Rotten Tomatoes – 35% (15/43): Not only is the movie’s juvenile dialogue unbearable for adults, but the turtles’ dopey and casual attitude towards physical violence makes them poor kids’ role models.

(Boooooooo. I don’t need this moralizing from my reviewers. Kids. Thought. This. Was. Rad. The end.)

NY Times Short Review: Now they meet Shredder’s new mutant monsters.

Poster – TMNT II: Check out Dis Ooze

(I enjoy a lot about this poster. Shadows are cool. Colors are bright. Could do with better font, but it looks like a painting, which is cool. Just one question… what is Michelangelo holding in his hands? Are those his nunchucks? B for the poster, F for drawing nunchucks.)

Tagline(s) – Back by bodacious demand. (C+)

(Hell yeah. I mean, no it’s not good, but I appreciate the unironic effort to be totally dope.)

Keyword(s) – wisdom

Best Options (daddio): 67.6 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III (1993), 46.3 Daddy Day Care (2003)

(So yeah, this is a bonus. Only the third one played on September 1st in the 90s. And obviously, because as I said, kids thought this was rad, it smashed the Kids’ Choice Awards.)

Welcome to Earf (HoE Number 15) – The shortest path through The Movie Database cast lists using only BMT films is: Paige Turco is No. 1 billed in Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze and No. 2 billed in Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III, which also stars Stuart Wilson (No. 3 billed) who is in Here on Earth (No. 9 billed) => (1 + 2) + (3 + 9) = 15. If we were to watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III we can get the HoE Number down to 15.

Notes – In the original Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1990) film, the turtles facial expressions were cable operated with all the motors, servos etc housed in the shell. In this movie, thanks to a larger budget, the animatronics were much smaller and lighter and were built into the face itself.

Judith Hoag was not called in to reprise her role as April O’Neil after the director was unhappy when she derided the way they mistreated the stunt doubles and their unfair schedules changes. She stated at SuperCon Florida that she had no ill-will towards Paige Turco. Instead they met 17 years later and are now good friends. The directors found Paige Turco to resemble the character more, and found her chemistry with the Turtles to seem more sincere.

Ernie Reyes Jr. was Donatello’s fight double in Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1990). Producers liked Reyes so much, they created the role of Keno just for him to replace the ultra-violent Casey Jones.

The building used for the entrance to April’s apartment is the office to the New York location of Jim Henson’s Creature Shop.

Dedicated to the memory of Jim Henson.

Justice League Preview

Jamie and Patrick boogie their way across the dance floor. The wedding was a smash hit. It was simulcast across every channel and used more energy than the country of Brazil. They cheers their beers and mack on some cake. Everything has come up Movie Twins since they kicked Kevin James’ head clean off. “I’m so proud of you,” Patrick says, remembering his own wedding back when things were simpler. When he didn’t have six children. When he hadn’t kicked a man’s head clean off. “I’m proud of me, too,” Jamie responds, tears in his eyes, remembering his own salad days filled with carefree innocence and demon boxes. “If only…” they say at the same time. Embarrassed, Patrick tells Jamie that he should go first. “No, no,” Jamie insists, “please, I interrupted you.” This goes on for hours. It’s charming. Finally they agree that they’ll both say it at the same time. One. Two. Three. “If only Dad were here,” they say and smile. Twins! “Maybe I am,” they whirl around and are shocked to see Scott Bakula. “Bakula the Snackula! My man!” Jamie says, giving Scott Bakula a big hug. “I really appreciate it, but we were kind of thinking of our real Dad.” Jamie smiles a bit sadly, but Scott Bakula puts a hand on his shoulder. “Maybe I am,” he says, tears streaming down his face, splashing on the genetic test report he has held in his hand that definitively determines that he is their father. The crowd goes wild. “I’d like to make a toast!” Scott Bakula declares. “To my sons, to the Bad Movie Twins, and to the dream father and sons team!” With that he reveals a new website. No longer Bad Movie Twins, but rather Bad Movie… Family. “Dream Team,” they all whisper. That’s right! We are doing the not-so-original dream team film, Justice League. Like many of the DC films this was critically reviled. But was it hated because it was compared to The Avengers? Or was it hated because it was taking away from Zack Snyder and chopped to pieces? Or is it just junk? Time to find out. Let’s go!

Justice League (2017) – BMeTric: 31.1; Notability: 117

StreetCreditReport.com – BMeTric: top 18.4%; Notability: top 0.4%; Rotten Tomatoes: top 26.2%; Higher BMeT: The Emoji Movie, Death Note, Jeepers Creepers III, Fifty Shades Darker, Rings, The Bye Bye Man, Snatched, Day of the Dead: Bloodline, The Snowman, Transformers: The Last Knight, Diary of a Wimpy Kid: The Long Haul, The Humanity Bureau, Leatherface, The Layover, Amityville: The Awakening, Flatliners, Wish Upon, Geostorm, The Circle, The Vault, and 26 more; Higher Notability: Transformers: The Last Knight; Lower RT: The Layover, Flatliners, Just Getting Started, Hangman, The Emoji Movie, The Snowman, Rings, Tulip Fever, American Renegades, Fifty Shades Darker, Day of the Dead: Bloodline, The Vanishing of Sidney Hall, The Mummy, The Dark Tower, The Circle, Transformers: The Last Knight, The Space Between Us, Jeepers Creepers III, Baywatch, Geostorm, and 43 more; Notes: 100+ notabilities are awesome. Even more absurd that The Last Night beat it. What the hell.

RogerEbert.com – 3.0 stars – It’s frustrating to see “Justice League” fail to get out of its own way, because whenever it does, it shrugs off the burdens of its famously troubled production and becomes special. An exact accounting of what went wrong is a matter for an investigative reporter, not a film reviewer, but one would assume that the filmmaking process wasn’t helped by the studio’s sudden, post-“Batman vs. Superman: Dawn of Justice” demand that the story add humor and camaraderie. Ditto the March, 2017 death of director Zack Snyder’s daughter, which put Joss Whedon, who’d already been hired for rewrites, in charge of post-production (including the CGI erasure of a mustache that Cavill grew after he thought the shoot had wrapped—a dubious technical triumph that results in some weird-looking close-ups). The extent of Whedon’s involvement in this rescue operation is anybody’s guess. Regardless, the end product is coherent: funny but rarely glib, serious but unpretentious, and better than it had any right to be.

(Very funny that this reviews seems to like it. I guess it isn’t unlikely. 40% of critics liked it. I just would have had the impression that big critics would have hated it.)

Trailer – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PXrgvNXfN7M/

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PXrgvNXfN7M/

(Kind of cool trailer I suppose. Besides the extremely muted colors. The terrible remix of a famous song. The “My man!” bit in the middle. The dumb looking bad guys and too-high-stakes CGI-fest. … Besides all that it looks cool.)

Directors – Zack Snyder – ( Known For: Zack Snyder’s Justice League; 300; Watchmen; Dawn of the Dead; Man of Steel; Army of the Dead; Legend of the Guardians: The Owls of Ga’Hoole; BMT: Justice League; Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice; Sucker Punch; Notes: He is his own genre. Smashed it with 300, but I think the wheels have come off. He basically just plays the hits for his devoted fans at this point.)

Writers – Jerry Siegel and Joe Shuster – ( Known For: Zack Snyder’s Justice League; Man of Steel; Superman; The Lego Batman Movie; Superman Returns; The Lego Movie 2: The Second Part; Superman II; Superman II: The Richard Donner Cut; Reign of the Supermen; BMT: Justice League; Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice; Superman III; Superman IV: The Quest for Peace; Notes: These are going to be the comic book creators of Superman.)

Chris Terrio – ( Known For: Star Wars: The Rise Of Skywalker; Zack Snyder’s Justice League; Argo; BMT: Justice League; Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice; Notes: Him writing Argo makes me think he’s Affleck’s guy. I think this guy probably actually wrote the film.)

Zack Snyder – ( Known For: Zack Snyder’s Justice League; 300; Wonder Woman; Army of the Dead; 300: Rise of an Empire; Army of Thieves; BMT: Justice League; Sucker Punch; Notes: He really got the car keys for this guy. I’ll eventually watch his four hour Justice League cut. I can’t really imagine the point.)

Joss Whedon – ( Known For: The Avengers; Toy Story; Avengers: Age of Ultron; The Cabin in the Woods; Atlantis: The Lost Empire; Serenity; Alien: Resurrection; Titan A.E.; In Your Eyes; Much Ado About Nothing; Future BMT: Buffy the Vampire Slayer; BMT: Justice League; Notes: Famously came in to take over after Snyder had to leave the production. By all accounts he was a colossal dick on set and the stories that came out afterwards was instrumental in destroying his career. Good job.)

Gardner Fox and Bob Kane and Bill Finger – ( Known For: The Batman; The Dark Knight; Joker; The Dark Knight Rises; Zack Snyder’s Justice League; Batman; Batman Begins; Batman Returns; The Lego Batman Movie; The Lego Movie 2: The Second Part; Batman: Mask of the Phantasm; Batman: The Movie; Batman Ninja; Batman; Batman: Soul of the Dragon; Batman and Robin; Scooby-Doo & Batman: The Brave and the Bold; Future BMT: Batman: The Killing Joke; BMT: Justice League; Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice; Batman & Robin; Batman Forever; Catwoman; Notes: And these are going to be the Batman guys. Fox doesn’t seem to get credit much, but here he is.)

William Moulton Marston – ( Known For: Shazam! Fury of the Gods; Zack Snyder’s Justice League; Wonder Woman; Wonder Woman 1984; The Lego Movie 2: The Second Part; Wonder Woman: Bloodlines; BMT: Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice; Notes: Ah this would be the Wonder Woman guy. His story is nuts. He was in a polyamorous relationship and Wonder Woman is explicitly based on either his wife or the woman they were in a relationship with. Fun story.)

Jack Kirby – ( Known For: Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania; Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2; Avengers: Endgame; Black Panther: Wakanda Forever; Avengers: Infinity War; Eternals; Iron Man; The Avengers; Zack Snyder’s Justice League; Ant-Man; Thor; Black Panther; Avengers: Age of Ultron; Ant-Man and the Wasp; Thor: Ragnarok; Captain Marvel; Captain America: Civil War; Iron Man Three; Iron Man 2; Captain America: The Winter Soldier; BMT: Justice League; Fantastic Four; Fantastic Four; Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer; Notes: Kirby is all over all comic books, both Marvel and DC.)

Actors – Ben Affleck – ( Known For: Air; Good Will Hunting; Dazed and Confused; Gone Girl; Zack Snyder’s Justice League; The Accountant; Deep Water; The Town; The Last Duel; Argo; Triple Frontier; Field of Dreams; Dogma; Clerks III; Daredevil; The Tender Bar; The Way Back; He’s Just Not That Into You; School Ties; Shakespeare in Love; Future BMT: Hypnotic; Smokin’ Aces; Buffy the Vampire Slayer; Live by Night; 200 Cigarettes; Surviving Christmas; BMT: Suicide Squad; Justice League; Pearl Harbor; Armageddon; Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice; Paycheck; Gigli; Runner Runner; Reindeer Games; Phantoms; Notes: He’s married to J-Lo now. He also won two Oscars, one for Good Will Hunting and the other as a producer for Argo. He’s had his ups and downs. I thought for a split second he might get an make-up Oscar nod for Air, but I think that is a long long shot.)

Gal Gadot – ( Known For: Fast X; Shazam! Fury of the Gods; Fast Five; Furious 6; Zack Snyder’s Justice League; Death on the Nile; Red Notice; Wonder Woman; Knight and Day; Wonder Woman 1984; Ralph Breaks the Internet; Date Night; Between Two Ferns: The Movie; Triple 9; Kicking Out Shoshana; Future BMT: Criminal; BMT: Fast & Furious; Justice League; Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice; Keeping Up with the Joneses; Notes: Famously a former Mossad agent in the Israeli army. In the few things I’ve seen her in she’s quite charming. Wonder Woman was good.)

Jason Momoa – ( Known For: Fast X; Dune; Zack Snyder’s Justice League; Aquaman; Slumberland; The Lego Movie 2: The Second Part; The Bad Batch; Wolves; Sweet Girl; The Last Manhunt; Braven; Bullet to the Head; Once Upon a Time in Venice; Road to Paloma; Sugar Mountain; Debug; Future BMT: Johnson Family Vacation; BMT: Justice League; Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice; Conan the Barbarian; Notes: Former WWE wrestler, and maybe the most successful version of that at the moment now that The Rock’s career is … on the rocks. Kind of broke through with his relatively small role on Game of Thrones, and now he had supporting performances in things like Dune.)

Budget/Gross – $300 million / Domestic: $229,024,295 (Worldwide: $657,926,987)

(That is pretty terrible for what they wanted, and spoiler, it never got better. This year DC’s grand plans died and they are kind of back to the drawing board as to exactly what to do with their IP.)

Rotten Tomatoes – 39% (161/409): Justice League leaps over a number of DC movies, but its single bound isn’t enough to shed the murky aesthetic, thin characters, and chaotic action that continue to dog the franchise.

(Yeah it barely makes it haha. Murky aesthetic is otherwise known as that Snyder look.)

NY Times Short Review: In this superhero jamboree, the Flash, Aquaman and Cyborg sign on with the DC Comics team leaders Batman and Wonder Woman. (Psst … where’s Superman?)

Poster – Goodniks United

(I am a huge font proponent. Just look at my track record. Years and years of font promotion. I want font up the wazoo… but this… this is too far up the wazoo my friends. You have wandered too deep into the wazoo. This… this is no good. D.)

Tagline(s) – You can’t save the world alone. (C-)

(I don’t know where this tagline is from but at least it’s short. That’s all I got.)

Keyword(s) – wisdom

Future BMT: 88.6 Dumb and Dumberer: When Harry Met Lloyd (2003), 84.0 Prom Night (2008), 83.6 Spy Kids 4: All the Time in the World (2011), 82.2 You Got Served (2004), 80.0 Jonas Brothers: The 3D Concert Experience (2009), 79.6 Nutty Professor II: The Klumps (2000), 78.8 Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chipwrecked (2011), 77.5 Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakquel (2009), 77.2 Superhero Movie (2008), 72.3 Bewitched (2005), 71.4 The Animal (2001), 69.4 College Road Trip (2008), 68.9 Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen (2004), 68.5 Poltergeist (2015), 68.2 Yogi Bear (2010), 67.6 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III (1993), 65.7 Halloween Ends (2022), 65.6 The Haunting of Molly Hartley (2008), 65.3 Fat Albert (2004), 65.0 Scary Movie 4 (2006)

BMT: Batman & Robin (1997), The Emoji Movie (2017), The Last Airbender (2010), Fifty Shades of Grey (2015), The Cat in the Hat (2003), Crossroads (2002), Norbit (2007), From Justin to Kelly (2003), The Master of Disguise (2002), Book of Shadows: Blair Witch 2 (2000), Sex and the City 2 (2010), Space Jam: A New Legacy (2021), xXx: State of the Union (2005), Aliens vs. Predator: Requiem (2007), Fifty Shades Freed (2018), Little Man (2006), The Twilight Saga: New Moon (2009), Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2 (2015), Taxi (2004), Freddy Got Fingered (2001), I Still Know What You Did Last Summer (1998), Zoolander 2 (2016), Kangaroo Jack (2003), Are We Done Yet? (2007), Police Academy 5: Assignment: Miami Beach (1988), The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn – Part 1 (2011), The Boy Next Door (2015), Wild Wild West (1999), Urban Legends: Final Cut (2000), Year One (2009), Are We There Yet? (2005), Marmaduke (2010), Big Momma’s House 2 (2006), The Roommate (2011), Tammy (2014), Abduction (2011), Miss Congeniality 2: Armed & Fabulous (2005), A Good Day to Die Hard (2013), Independence Day: Resurgence (2016), Transformers: The Last Knight (2017), New York Minute (2004), Hot Pursuit (2015), Paul Blart: Mall Cop (2009), Big Momma’s House (2000), An American Haunting (2005), … (and many more)

Best Options (suicide-squad): 84.0 Prom Night (2008), 62.2 Madea Goes to Jail (2009), 53.9 Annie (2014), 51.7 Get Rich or Die Tryin’ (2005), 44.6 G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra (2009), 37.8 Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen (2009), 34.1 Shark Tale (2004), 32.3 Joe Dirt (2001), 31.1 Justice League (2017), 27.8 The Divergent Series: Insurgent (2015), 27.0 War (2007), 24.8 Terminator Genisys (2015), 20.9 Charlie St. Cloud (2010), 19.4 Terminator Salvation (2009), 19.4 Fantastic Beasts: The Crimes of Grindelwald (2018), 17.0 Saw II (2005), 9.0 The Longest Ride (2015)

(Very borderline (Ezra Miller is in Suicide Squad for like five seconds), but it checks out. I just want to get through all the DC films you know?)

Welcome to Earf (HoE Number 8) – The shortest path through The Movie Database cast lists using only BMT films is: Ben Affleck is No. 1 billed in Justice League and No. 1 billed in Pearl Harbor, which also stars Josh Hartnett (No. 3 billed) who is in Here on Earth (No. 3 billed) => (1 + 1) + (3 + 3) = 8. There is no shorter path at the moment.

Notes – When the film was shown in Iceland, which uses subtitles rather than dialog dubbing for films with non-Icelandic languages, Jason Momoa’s pronunciation of his single line of Icelandic was so unintelligible that it had to be subtitled into Icelandic (often resulting in audience laughter).

Director Zack Snyder and his wife, producer Deborah Snyder, stepped down from finishing the film after the suicide of their daughter in March 2017. They tried to remain involved in the film as a way to work through the difficulty, but after two months decided to step away from the project to spend time with their family. Joss Whedon, who had signed on for Batgirl, took over as director, managing additional scenes that need to be included in the final cut. Warner Bros. have stated that Joss would direct and write in the same style as Zack so there won’t be any tonal shifts or obvious changes in style. However, Whedon controversially fired Snyder’s composer, Tom Holkenborg, and replaced him with Danny Elfman, who previously composed Whedon’s Avengers: Age of Ultron (2015).

Extensive reshoots in London and Los Angeles in mid-2017 added a cost of approximately $25 million to the film’s budget. Henry Cavill worked on the reshoots and Mission: Impossible – Fallout (2018) at the same time. He had to sport a moustache for his role in the latter project. However, Paramount refused to let the actor shave it off to play Superman in the reshoots. This meant that Cavill’s facial hair had to be digitally removed in post-production. However, due to a tight schedule, the results were crude and were among the many criticisms of the theatrical version of the film.

Holt McCallany, who plays the burglar in the first scene with Batman, said the scene was written and shot by Joss Whedon as comedic, but Warner Bros. preferred to open the film with a more serious tone, and the scene was re-edited. When McCallany returned home to New York, he found a bottle of his favorite champagne at his door and a note from Whedon that said, ‘To battles lost. Gratefully, Joss.’ McCallany appreciated Whedon’s gesture and had the letter framed.

Due to the running time backlash of past DC movies, Warner Bros. demanded a film under two hours without credits. While the final running time for Justice League (2017) was only 119 minutes, the director’s cut, Zack Snyder’s Justice League (2021), stands at a whopping 242 minutes.

Glass Preview

Jamie and Patrick climb on stage and grab the microphone from Kevin James. “This man is a fraud,” they yell, “they man has no honor as he won’t name us. He will only imply that we have exceptionally itchy balls from the safety of parody. But we don’t. So Kevin James,” they turn to look at him, “Prepare to do battle.” They throw the microphone into the crowd and begin to pummel him with all their twin might. In that moment they are a mix between man and jaguar, monstrous beings that only vaguely resemble humans. Kevin James’ eyes are wild with fear. He attempts to scramble his way back into the bathroom he allegedly destroyed, but Jamie and Patrick suspect was just another one of his foul lies used for a cheap laugh. Before he gets there, they grab him by the legs and fling him like a ragdoll into his precious crowd. He begs them for help, but the crowd recoils, fearing that any help they give will be met with a storm of fury from Jamie and Patrick. Kevin James scrambles backwards, bumping up against the duffel bag he carries with him containing the many awards he has won. He attempts to appease them by giving them these trophies, like a man hoping to appease an angry god, but Jamie and Patrick simply bat away his 2013 MovieGuide Grace Award. “Help me, robot man!” Kevin James screams in desperation at Michael, but the robot nods his head. The twins have finally got it. The people are always right and the people want blood. “You’ve awakened The Beast and here comes the boom,” Jamie says demonically and with that they launch into a flying twin kick that knocks Kevin James’ head clean off. That’s right! We are watching the M. Night BMT classic Glass. He has launched himself out of director jail, but it doesn’t mean he can’t throw us a BMT bone once in a while. Let’s go!

Glass (2019) – BMeTric: 16.9; Notability: 27

StreetCreditReport.com – BMeTric: top 18.4%; Notability: top 7.6%; Rotten Tomatoes: top 18.3%; Higher BMeT: Cats, Secret Obsession, IO, Escape Plan: The Extractors, The Fanatic, Hellboy, The Curse of La Llorona, After, The Poison Rose, The Silence, Tall Girl, Rim of the World, The Hustle, In the Tall Grass, Playing with Fire, Polaroid, The Haunting of Sharon Tate, Serenity, Primal, Countdown, and 26 more; Higher Notability: Maleficent: Mistress of Evil, X-Men: Dark Phoenix, Men in Black: International, 6 Underground, Cats, UglyDolls, Gemini Man, Above Suspicion, The Kitchen, Angel Has Fallen, Zeroville, The Dirt, The Goldfinch, Hellboy, Shaft, Rim of the World, Otherhood, The Hustle, Rambo: Last Blood; Lower RT: The Poison Rose, Polaroid, The Coldest Game, The Hustle, The Fanatic, Buddy Games, Hellboy, After, Polar, The Haunting of Sharon Tate, Cats, The Jesus Rolls, Serenity, Miss Bala, Lucy in the Sky, Jexi, Iron Mask, X-Men: Dark Phoenix, Zeroville, Men in Black: International, and 24 more; Notes: Man, should we just watch Cats again? What a glory.

RogerEbert.com – 2.0 stars – There are glimpses of the crazy, ambitious movie that “Glass” could have been, and that’s what saves it from complete “Happening”-level disaster. Once again, McAvoy is giving it his all, even if he’s not getting as much back in return as he did last time (and is balanced by another half-hearted Willis performance in which I swear you can practically see him fall asleep). And there are just enough out-there ideas in “Glass” that it’s impossible to completely dismiss even if they don’t come together. It’s that fine line between ambitiously clunky in a way that engages the viewer and just sloppy. I honestly kept trying to engage with “Glass” as a fan of Shyamalan’s early films, comic books, and movies that try to mash-up familiar genres in a way that makes a new one. I ultimately resigned myself to the fact that it’s not my fault that it’s broken.

(Yeah, this is roughly the gist I got from a few different podcast discussions. Although some of those were more impressed with the gall of M. Night to pull the rug out from the viewers in the end.)

Trailer – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q7ztHi9ejp4/

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q7ztHi9ejp4/

(Solid trailer. Given how well received Split was this was quite highly anticipated as well. Looked awesome.)

Directors – M. Night Shyamalan – ( Known For: Knock at the Cabin; Split; Old; The Sixth Sense; Signs; Unbreakable; The Visit; The Village; Wide Awake; Praying with Anger; BMT: Glass; The Last Airbender; The Happening; After Earth; Lady in the Water; Notes: Y’all know M. Night. Incredible that we have officially finished his filmography … again I guess, we did previously at one point too it looks like.)

Writers – M. Night Shyamalan – ( Known For: Knock at the Cabin; Split; Old; The Sixth Sense; Signs; Unbreakable; The Visit; Stuart Little; The Village; Devil; Wide Awake; Praying with Anger; BMT: Glass; The Last Airbender; The Happening; After Earth; Lady in the Water; Notes: The son of two doctors (I think) in Philadelphia which is why he always sets his films there. Prior to him ever directing a film he declared he would be the next Spielberg. He kind of was for a bit.)

Actors – James McAvoy – ( Known For: Split; The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe; Deadpool 2; Atonement; The Bubble; It Chapter Two; Wanted; X: First Class; X-Men: Apocalypse; X-Men: Days of Future Past; Atomic Blonde; Trance; The Last King of Scotland; Filth; Gnomeo & Juliet; Muppets Most Wanted; Penelope; Becoming Jane; Starter for 10; My Son; Future BMT: Victor Frankenstein; Sherlock Gnomes; BMT: Glass; X-Men: Dark Phoenix; Notes: He was pretty good in Split, although I didn’t care for the little kid character. Scottish, and a bit amazing he’s never been nominated for an Academy Award at least.)

Bruce Willis – ( Known For: Pulp Fiction; The Fifth Element; Split; Sin City; The Sixth Sense; Moonrise Kingdom; Die Hard; Alpha Dog; Unbreakable; 12 Monkeys; The Expendables; Over the Hedge; Assassin; Wrong Place; Looper; RED; Paradise City; Planet Terror; The Last Boy Scout; The Lego Movie 2: The Second Part; Future BMT: Tears of the Sun; The Cold Light of Day; The Jackal; Blind Date; Hostage; Surrogates; Striking Distance; Loaded Weapon 1; Last Man Standing; Cop Out; Look Who’s Talking Too; Sunset; The Story of Us; Rugrats Go Wild; Billy Bathgate; Rock the Kasbah; BMT: G.I. Joe: Retaliation; Armageddon; Glass; Death Wish; Color of Night; A Good Day to Die Hard; The Bonfire of the Vanities; Perfect Stranger; Hudson Hawk; Mercury Rising; North; The Whole Ten Yards; Notes: Sadly retired from acting due to, effectively, dementia which caused aphasia. His last few years of multiple horrible films was basically him making a little bit of money for his family prior to revealing the diagnosis.)

Samuel L. Jackson – ( Known For: Avengers: Endgame; Pulp Fiction; Avengers: Infinity War; Goodfellas; Kingsman: The Secret Service; Star Wars: Episode I – The Phantom Menace; Star Wars: The Rise Of Skywalker; A Time to Kill; Inglourious Basterds; Jurassic Park; Django Unchained; Star Wars: Episode III – Revenge of the Sith; Iron Man; The Avengers; Captain America: The First Avenger; Star Wars: Episode II – Attack of the Clones; The Hateful Eight; Oldboy; The Incredibles; Thor; Future BMT: The Legend of Tarzan; Spiral; Star Wars: The Clone Wars; Rules of Engagement; Life Itself; Sphere; The Spirit; Basic; Loaded Weapon 1; Formula 51; One Eight Seven; The Man; Fluke; Amos & Andrew; Strictly Business; Freedomland; BMT: Glass; Hitman’s Wife’s Bodyguard; Jumper; Shaft; xXx: State of the Union; Twisted; Notes: Incredibly prolific. Obviously smashed out an incredible run in the MCU, and now has a new TV show there as well.)

Budget/Gross – $20,000,000 / Domestic: $111,048,468 (Worldwide: $246,999,039)

(That is really good. Ever since M. Night paired up with Blumhouse he’s been making bank because I think he basically puts up the whole $20 million himself and gets like all the profit.)

Rotten Tomatoes – 37% (149/408): Glass displays a few glimmers of M. Night Shyamalan at his twisty world-building best, but ultimately disappoints as the conclusion to the writer-director’s long-gestating trilogy.

(Yeah, basically. But films that are this close to not qualifying are usually either boring or good. I guess we’ll see.)

NY Times Short Review: In his enjoyable, messy sequel to “Unbreakable” and “Split,” Shyamalan joins together three adversaries in a world of ordinary terrors.

Poster – Glass Smash

(This is unfortunately just OK. I like the different colors and the artistic qualities I’m seeing, but it looks a little like when a TV has motion smoothing on. And look at that font. Horrible. Just do better, cause I like the ideas. B-.)

Tagline(s) – None (F)

(I don’t see a real tagline on the poster, which is where I like to get my taglines. IMDb does have a whole bunch listed though, so they must have been used somewhere. Just not here.)

Keyword(s) – wisdom

Future BMT: 88.5 Dumb and Dumberer: When Harry Met Lloyd (2003), 84.0 Prom Night (2008), 83.5 Spy Kids 4: All the Time in the World (2011), 82.2 You Got Served (2004), 80.0 Jonas Brothers: The 3D Concert Experience (2009), 79.6 Nutty Professor II: The Klumps (2000), 78.8 Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chipwrecked (2011), 77.5 Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakquel (2009), 77.2 Superhero Movie (2008), 72.3 Bewitched (2005), 71.4 The Animal (2001), 69.3 College Road Trip (2008), 68.9 Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen (2004), 68.5 Poltergeist (2015), 68.2 Yogi Bear (2010), 67.6 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III (1993), 65.6 The Haunting of Molly Hartley (2008), 65.6 Halloween Ends (2022), 65.3 Fat Albert (2004), 65.0 Scary Movie 4 (2006)

BMT: Batman & Robin (1997), The Emoji Movie (2017), The Last Airbender (2010), Fifty Shades of Grey (2015), The Cat in the Hat (2003), Crossroads (2002), Norbit (2007), Fantastic Four (2015), From Justin to Kelly (2003), The Master of Disguise (2002), Book of Shadows: Blair Witch 2 (2000), xXx: State of the Union (2005), Sex and the City 2 (2010), Space Jam: A New Legacy (2021), Aliens vs. Predator: Requiem (2007), Fifty Shades Freed (2018), The Twilight Saga: New Moon (2009), Little Man (2006), Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2 (2015), Taxi (2004), Freddy Got Fingered (2001), I Still Know What You Did Last Summer (1998), Zoolander 2 (2016), Kangaroo Jack (2003), Are We Done Yet? (2007), Police Academy 5: Assignment: Miami Beach (1988), The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn – Part 1 (2011), The Boy Next Door (2015), Wild Wild West (1999), Urban Legends: Final Cut (2000), Year One (2009), Are We There Yet? (2005), Big Momma’s House 2 (2006), Marmaduke (2010), The Roommate (2011), Tammy (2014), Abduction (2011), Miss Congeniality 2: Armed & Fabulous (2005), A Good Day to Die Hard (2013), Independence Day: Resurgence (2016), … and many more

Best Options (Horror): 84.0 Prom Night (2008), 68.5 Poltergeist (2015), 65.6 The Haunting of Molly Hartley (2008), 65.6 Halloween Ends (2022), 64.7 The Grudge 2 (2006), 64.5 Darkness Falls (2003), 63.6 Valentine (2001), 61.2 A Nightmare on Elm Street (2010), 59.9 Exorcist: The Beginning (2004), 58.7 Scary Movie 2 (2001), 55.2 Annabelle (2014), 50.7 Saw 3D (2010), 50.5 Halloween Kills (2021), 49.3 The Omen (2006), 48.5 White Noise (2005), 40.9 Resident Evil: Afterlife (2010), 40.4 Gothika (2003), 36.9 The Amityville Horror (2005), 36.5 Hide and Seek (2005), 33.2 House of 1000 Corpses (2003), 27.8 Dark Shadows (2012), 27.7 Saw III (2006), 25.7 Idle Hands (1999), 23.9 The Uninvited (2009), 19.2 Insidious: Chapter 2 (2013), 17.0 Saw II (2005), 16.9 Glass (2019)

(Oh hell yeah, we picked the last one. The reason is because we were already watching a bunch of M. Night films. So … there we are. We almost watched Prom Night.)

Welcome to Earf (HoE Number 13) – The shortest path through The Movie Database cast lists using only BMT films is: Bruce Willis is No. 2 billed in Glass and No. 1 billed in Armageddon, which also stars Ben Affleck (No. 3 billed) who is in Pearl Harbor (No. 1 billed) which also stars Josh Hartnett (No. 3 billed) who is in Here on Earth (No. 3 billed) => (2 + 1) + (3 + 1) + (3 + 3) = 13. If we were to watch The Jackal, Nights in Rodanthe, and The Glass House we can get the HoE Number down to 12.

Notes – Samuel L. Jackson said of working with James McAvoy on the movie, “As good as I like to think I am or what I do and how I do it, watching somebody transform characters in front of your eyes and have an argument with four different people is pretty amazing.”

Director M. Night Shyamalan was able to incorporate unseen footage from Unbreakable (2000) into this film, for flashback scenes involving the younger versions of David and Joseph.

Although Disney owns the rights to Unbreakable (2000), director M. Night Shyamalan retained the rights to any potential sequels, so that the studio could not make one without his involvement. Such was his desire for creative control that he co-financed this film by mortgaging his house.

Director M. Night Shyamalan talked about the importance of colors in this movie, saying, “I chose green for David Dunn because psychologically, it is associated with life giving properties. David is the protector of life. I chose ochre or mustard for The Beast because this color is associated with religious ceremonies, Hindu and Buddhist. A monk’s robe. I see The Beast as an evangelist, a preacher who wants to help save ‘The Broken.’ Finally, I chose purple for Mr. Glass because this color has been associated with royalty, majestic qualities. Elijah sees himself as important, a main character of comics.”

Director M. Night Shyamalan said that the original cut of the film had a run time of nearly three and a half hours. He “trimmed it up a bit” by cutting three of Kevin Crumb’s 23 personalities out of the film.

The original script for Unbreakable (2000) included Kevin as an emerging villain for David to face against, but director M. Night Shyamalan could never make it work within the confines of a single movie. Thus, Kevin ended up being Split (2016) off into his own movie, with this film as the culmination of the original idea.

Awards – Nominee for the Razzie Award for Worst Supporting Actor (Bruce Willis, 2019)

Wrath of the Titans Preview

“Why are we still here?” asks Jamie, a dark pall hanging over his features. “Because,” Michael explains, “you are meant to reconnect with people. Kevin James connects with people. If you understand that then we can leave. Beep boop” Patrick scoffs. “I think the answer to that starts with a ‘D’ and ends with an ‘uh.’ We aren’t total idiots, we know Paul Blart was a sensation.” They get up to leave. “Is that so?” Michael robot scoffs right back at them, “Then why did you spend,” he pauses, a mechanical whirring sound intensifying as he performs a quick numerical calculation, “1,146 words talking about Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2 on BadMovieTwins.com and conclude, and I quote, ‘it’s trash.’ Beep boop?” This robot is asking for another punch to its robot chest. Jamie and Patrick clench their fists, but eventually sit back down. When he’s right, he’s right… and also they installed a titanium plate over his chest in the rebuild. Their fists would likely splinter in a cloud of pink mist if they attempted a similar punch a second time. They turn their attention back at the stage where Kevin James has launched into his third (and hopefully final) impression of who he calls Itch and Blow: The Dope-elgangers. The crowd is loving it. “Look at my abs! Look at my greasy abs!” Kevin James is screaming and the crowd wails. “Oh man, my balls are itchy,” he continues as Itch. The crowd gobbles it up. Jamie and Patrick grit their teeth and laugh along with the crowd. Whatever it takes to satisfy Michael. It’s working until Kevin James looks at them again and mouths “You stink, Bad Movie Twins.” That’s it! “Let’s pound some dweebs,” they say in unison, getting up from their chairs. That’s right! It’s a double this week with Clash of the Titans and Wrath of the Titans. If you wondered what Sam Worthington used his Avatar cache on, well… it was this. Let’s go!

Wrath of the Titans (2012) – BMeTric: 44.5; Notability: 65

StreetCreditReport.com – BMeTric: top 10.4%; Notability: top 2.4%; Rotten Tomatoes: top 18.8%; Higher BMeT: Piranha 3DD, The Devil Inside, LOL, Paranormal Activity 4, The Apparition, Smiley, ATM, Chernobyl Diaries, The Cold Light of Day, The ABCs of Death, Dark Tide, Alex Cross, Resident Evil: Retribution, So Undercover, Red Dawn, Aftershock, Lay the Favorite, One for the Money, About Cherry, Madea’s Witness Protection, and 6 more; Higher Notability: Battleship, Dark Shadows, Ice Age: Continental Drift, This Means War, Red Tails, Total Recall; Lower RT: A Thousand Words, Dark Tide, One for the Money, The Apparition, The Cold Light of Day, Atlas Shrugged II: The Strike, Playing for Keeps, The Devil Inside, So Undercover, Fire with Fire, The Babymakers, Breaking the Girls, Alex Cross, Piranha 3DD, ATM, Gone, House at the End of the Street, Meeting Evil, LOL, About Cherry, and 25 more; Notes: Wow, the drop in the notability is startling. I suppose they really cut down on the gods and goddesses which is where a lot of the big names hung out for the two scene cameos in the first.

RogerEbert.com – 2.0 stars – Maybe it was the three exploding mountains too many. Or the dozen surplus fireballs. Or too much noise. “Wrath of the Titans” relentlessly wore me down with special effects so overscale compared to the characters in the film that at times the only thing to do was grin. The characters, to be sure, are gods and not humans, but they are human-sized gods. Give it a moment’s thought: What chance does your average muscular god have against the grinding stones of a labyrinth as large as a volcano?

(Yeah here we go. The first was good for what it is. But then this is average for what it is, which means bad. The logic checks out.)

Trailer – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8jEWLCZA7R8/

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8jEWLCZA7R8/

(I distinctly enjoy the lack of a heavy metal soundtrack. Looks bigger and noisier and still pretty rad.)

Directors – Jonathan Liebesman – ( Known For: The Killing Room; Future BMT: Darkness Falls; BMT: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles; The Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning; Wrath of the Titans; Battle Los Angeles; Notes: And he was an executive producer on Doolitte. South African. He directed 4 episodes of the Halo television series.)

Writers – Dan Mazeau – ( Known For: Fast X; BMT: Wrath of the Titans; Notes: Has a Van Helsing script in development.)

David Leslie Johnson-McGoldrick – ( Known For: Orphan; Aquaman; Orphan: First Kill; The Conjuring 2; The Conjuring: The Devil Made Me Do It; BMT: Wrath of the Titans; Red Riding Hood; Notes: Has both the sequel to Aquaman and the fourth Conjuring film on the docket.)

Greg Berlanti – ( Known For: The Broken Hearts Club: A Romantic Comedy; Future BMT: Green Lantern; BMT: Wrath of the Titans; Notes: Nominated for two Emmys for The Flight Attendant and Political Animals. At this point he appears to develop all of the DC live-action television work.)

Beverley Cross – ( Known For: Clash of the Titans; Jason and the Argonauts; Sinbad and the Eye of the Tiger; The Long Ships; Genghis Khan; Half a Sixpence; BMT: Wrath of the Titans; Notes: Wait … is this based on part of the first movie or something. What an odd credit. Man, I really should have watched the original movie. Then I would know these things.)

Actors – Sam Worthington – ( Known For: Simulant; Avatar: The Way of Water; Avatar; Hacksaw Ridge; Everest; Fractured; Last Night; Rogue; Cake; The Titan; Lansky; The Debt; The Last Son; Texas Killing Fields; 9 Bullets; Hart’s War; The Keeping Room; The Hunter’s Prayer; Kidnapping Mr. Heineken; Paper Planes; Future BMT: Terminator Salvation; The Shack; Man on a Ledge; The Great Raid; BMT: Clash of the Titans; Wrath of the Titans; Sabotage; Notes: Again, you know Sam Worthington. Apparently he got so ripped for Avatar and Terminator: Salvation it changes his character in these films from somewhat slender to ultra-ripped.)

Liam Neeson – ( Known For: Star Wars: Episode I – The Phantom Menace; Star Wars: The Rise Of Skywalker; Schindler’s List; The Dark Knight Rises; Star Wars: Episode II – Attack of the Clones; The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe; Batman Begins; Love Actually; The Ballad of Buster Scruggs; Gangs of New York; Taken; Excalibur; The Lego Movie; The Chronicles of Narnia: The Voyage of the Dawn Treader; The A-Team; Widows; The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian; Silence; Run All Night; Ted 2; Future BMT: Marlowe; Kingdom of Heaven; Men in Black: International; The Marksman; Krull; Taken 3; A Million Ways to Die in the West; Taken 2; Entourage; The Huntsman: Winter’s War; Daddy’s Home 2; High Spirits; The Nut Job; Before and After; BMT: Battleship; Memory; Clash of the Titans; Blacklight; The Haunting; Wrath of the Titans; Notes: He has eight films on the docket including the sequel to Ice Road. You ever see Ice Road? It’s bananas.)

Rosamund Pike – ( Known For: Pride & Prejudice; Gone Girl; Jack Reacher; The World’s End; Hostiles; I Care a Lot; The Informer; Die Another Day; Fracture; Return to Sender; An Education; The Big Year; What We Did on Our Holiday; The Man with the Iron Heart; Beirut; A Private War; Radioactive; Hector and the Search for Happiness; A United Kingdom; A Long Way Down; Future BMT: 7 Days in Entebbe; Surrogates; Johnny English Reborn; The Libertine; BMT: Doom; Wrath of the Titans; Notes: Notably is starring in the Wheel of Time television show on Amazon. Nominated for an Oscar for Gone Girl.)

Budget/Gross – $150,000,000 / Domestic: $83,670,083 (Worldwide: $301,970,083)

(Yeah, so this is more of a disaster. I honestly find this a bit odd. They cut down the cast quite dramatically, so why did the budget go up again? Seems like a bad idea.)

Rotten Tomatoes – 26% (46/176): Its 3D effects are an improvement over its predecessor’s, but in nearly every other respect, Wrath of the Titans fails to improve upon the stilted acting, wooden dialogue, and chaos-driven plot of the franchise’s first installment.

(Yes, yes, yes … wait why did Ebert think the first was better. I’m joking. Having watched both the first is way better than the second, and the fact that critics failed to recognize that outside of Ebert I think is not super great.)

NY Times Short Review: In this sequel to the 2010 “Clash of the Titans” remake, Zeus asks his demigod son for help, as the battle for supremacy between the gods and the Titans goes on.

Poster – Wrath of the Tight Twins

(This looks markedly worse than the first one even though it’s essentially the same. I’m not sure why. I can kind of smell the stench of garbage wafting off of it. C-.)

Tagline(s) – Feel the Wrath (D-)

(Boooooooo.)

Keyword(s) – wisdom

Future BMT: 88.5 Dumb and Dumberer: When Harry Met Lloyd (2003), 84.0 Prom Night (2008), 83.5 Spy Kids 4: All the Time in the World (2011), 82.2 You Got Served (2004), 80.0 Jonas Brothers: The 3D Concert Experience (2009), 79.6 Nutty Professor II: The Klumps (2000), 78.8 Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chipwrecked (2011), 77.5 Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakquel (2009), 77.2 Superhero Movie (2008), 72.3 Bewitched (2005), 71.4 The Animal (2001), 69.3 College Road Trip (2008), 68.9 Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen (2004), 68.4 Poltergeist (2015), 68.2 Yogi Bear (2010), 67.6 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III (1993), 65.6 The Haunting of Molly Hartley (2008), 65.6 Halloween Ends (2022), 65.3 Fat Albert (2004), 65.0 Scary Movie 4 (2006)

BMT: Batman & Robin (1997), The Emoji Movie (2017), The Last Airbender (2010), Fifty Shades of Grey (2015), The Cat in the Hat (2003), Crossroads (2002), Norbit (2007), From Justin to Kelly (2003), The Master of Disguise (2002), Book of Shadows: Blair Witch 2 (2000), xXx: State of the Union (2005), Sex and the City 2 (2010), Space Jam: A New Legacy (2021), Aliens vs. Predator: Requiem (2007), Fifty Shades Freed (2018), The Twilight Saga: New Moon (2009), Little Man (2006), Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2 (2015), Taxi (2004), Freddy Got Fingered (2001), I Still Know What You Did Last Summer (1998), Zoolander 2 (2016), Kangaroo Jack (2003), Are We Done Yet? (2007), Police Academy 5: Assignment: Miami Beach (1988), The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn – Part 1 (2011), The Boy Next Door (2015), Wild Wild West (1999), Urban Legends: Final Cut (2000), Year One (2009), Are We There Yet? (2005), Big Momma’s House 2 (2006), Marmaduke (2010), The Roommate (2011), Tammy (2014), Abduction (2011), Miss Congeniality 2: Armed & Fabulous (2005), A Good Day to Die Hard (2013), Independence Day: Resurgence (2016), Transformers: The Last Knight (2017), New York Minute (2004), Hot Pursuit (2015), Paul Blart: Mall Cop (2009), Big Momma’s House (2000), An American Haunting (2005), … (and many more)

Best Options (Action): 83.5 Spy Kids 4: All the Time in the World (2011), 77.2 Superhero Movie (2008), 67.6 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III (1993), 56.8 Land of the Lost (2009), 48.2 You Don’t Mess with the Zohan (2008), 47.8 Men in Black: International (2019), 44.6 G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra (2009), 44.5 Wrath of the Titans (2012), 44.0 Allegiant (2016), 41.2 Clash of the Titans (2010), 40.9 Resident Evil: Afterlife (2010), 40.6 The Mortal Instruments: City of Bones (2013), 37.8 Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen (2009), 36.6 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out of the Shadows (2016), 34.3 Van Helsing (2004), 34.2 The Tourist (2010), 34.1 Taken 3 (2014), 33.4 Sahara (2005), 32.3 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze (1991), 31.1 Justice League (2017), 30.3 The Huntsman: Winter’s War (2016), 29.4 Waist Deep (2006), 27.9 Transformers: Dark of the Moon (2011), 27.8 The Divergent Series: Insurgent (2015), 27.7 Dracula Untold (2014), 27.6 Rush Hour 3 (2007), 27.3 Antitrust (2001), 27.0 War (2007), 25.6 Pokémon: The First Movie – Mewtwo Strikes Back (1998), 24.8 Terminator Genisys (2015), 24.6 King Arthur (2004), 22.0 Now You See Me 2 (2016), 21.7 Let’s Be Cops (2014), 21.0 Act of Valor (2012), 19.4 Terminator Salvation (2009), 19.4 Kick-Ass 2 (2013), 17.0 Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time (2010), 16.9 Eagle Eye (2008), 16.7 Tears of the Sun (2003), 14.8 The Matrix Revolutions (2003), 14.8 Angels & Demons (2009), 12.8 The Island (2005), 9.3 Underworld (2003), 6.6 Kingdom of Heaven (2005)

(Don’t worry, we’ll hit up all three TMNT films soon enough …)

Welcome to Earf (HoE Number 14) – The shortest path through The Movie Database cast lists using only BMT films is: Sam Worthington is No. 1 billed in Wrath of the Titans and No. 1 billed in Clash of the Titans, which also stars Gemma Arterton (No. 2 billed) who is in Runner Runner (No. 2 billed) which also stars Ben Affleck (No. 1 billed) who is in Pearl Harbor (No. 1 billed) which also stars Josh Hartnett (No. 3 billed) who is in Here on Earth (No. 3 billed) => (1 + 1) + (2 + 2) + (1 + 1) + (3 + 3) = 14. If we were to watch Marlowe we can get the HoE Number down to 13.

Notes – The movie takes place 10 years after the previous one.

Gemma Arterton was originally supposed to return, but scheduling conflicts with Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters (2013) prevented that. Her character was written out, rather than being re-cast, as Andromeda was.

Hephaestus converses with Bubo, the mechanical owl from Clash of the Titans (1981).

Bill Nighy, who plays Hephaestus, when recognizing Perseus, says “Release the Kraken”. Nighy plays “Davy Jones” in Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest (2006) and says the same thing.

In preparation for her role as Andromeda, Rosamund Pike was instructed by director Jonathan Liebesman to study Mel Gibson’s William Wallace in Braveheart (1995), not fellow Bond girl Sophie Marceau’s Princess Isabelle as she’d naturally, though wrongly, anticipated.

Contenders for the role of Andromeda were Hayley Atwell, Georgina Haig, Janet Montgomery, Dominique McElligott, and Clémence Poésy. The role was previously portrayed in Clash of the Titans (2010) by Alexa Davalos, who turned down an offer to reprise it.

Javier Bardem was considered for the role of Ares, and James Franco was considered to play Agenor.

Rosamund Pike replaced Alexa Davalos from Clash of the Titans (2010) as Andromeda.

Sent to the cinemas under code name “Torn Between”.

The sound the Minotaur makes is a recording of the grunt of an elephant. It also happens to be the very same sound effect used for the Minotaur-boss in Hercules (1997) .

A sequel for the film, titled “Revenge of the Titans” was in production, and the plot would have involved the resurrection of the gods. However, it was later scrapped, due to the poor reception of this film.

Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls Preview

Jamie and Patrick look around the dance hall in downtown Lebanon, Kansas. People are dosadoing and promenading all the while staring in confusion at their jorts and leather vests. “Remind us again why we’re here? I thought we were gonna feel the rhythm take hold of our hearts… dance for our lives… what a feeling,” Jamie says, annoyed. Michael nods, “Yes, beep boop, The Dudikoffs want you to reconnect with the people. A beautiful artistic experimental dance is one thing. A people-pleasing, flashy dance is another. Time works differently in the catacombs. Beep boop.” Before embarking they had reassembled Michael, but not all the kinks were worked out yet. Jamie leans in close to Patrick’s ear to whisper something even Michael’s robot ears couldn’t hear. “Let’s blow this joint. Why not just go back to NYC and finish the Platonic Solids Series?” Patrick tended to agree. His neck had been itching for the feel of his cable knit sweater. Just as they turn to leave, though, an announcement rings out over the sound system. “Ladies and gentleman, start your engines because our special guest is here to show you how it’s done. ‘It’ is comedy. ‘It’ is sex appeal. ‘It’ is close-up magic. ‘He’ is three time Teen Choice Award nominee, one time People’s Choice Nominee, and current host of smash hit America is Very Good… Kevin James!” The crowd goes bananas. Kevin James emerges from a nearby restroom, grabs a microphone, and alerts all the attendees of the event that they should not go in there, implying that he destroyed the toilet. The crowd is laughing so hard that several of them faint. Jamie and Patrick turn around to find Kevin James staring directly at them from the stage mouthing the words “fuck you, Bad Movie Twins.” That’s right! Every once in a while you have to pick up a classic and this is one of those times. Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls was a smash hit, both financially and in our hearts. Let’s go!

Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls (1995) – BMeTric: 21.9; Notability: 41

StreetCreditReport.com – BMeTric: top 21.6%; Notability: top 12.0%; Rotten Tomatoes: top 16.3%; Higher BMeT: Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Next Generation, Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers, Lawnmower Man 2: Beyond Cyberspace, Vampire in Brooklyn, Fair Game, Showgirls, Jury Duty, Batman Forever, Mighty Morphin Power Rangers, Congo, Theodore Rex, The Babysitter, Under Siege 2: Dark Territory, A Kid in King Arthur’s Court, Candyman: Farewell to the Flesh, Judge Dredd, Nine Months, The Scarlet Letter, Johnny Mnemonic, Virtuosity, and 34 more; Higher Notability: Batman Forever, Congo, Judge Dredd, Cutthroat Island, Under Siege 2: Dark Territory, Virtuosity, Showgirls, Mighty Morphin Power Rangers, Four Rooms, Money Train, Panther, Jefferson in Paris, Jade, Assassins, Things to Do in Denver When You’re Dead, Hackers, Canadian Bacon, Just Cause, Nine Months, Dangerous Minds, and 10 more; Lower RT: The Big Green, Jury Duty, National Lampoon’s Senior Trip, Theodore Rex, Delta of Venus, Born to Be Wild, The Walking Dead, Top Dog, A Kid in King Arthur’s Court, The Hunted, It Takes Two, Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers, Bushwhacked, Lawnmower Man 2: Beyond Cyberspace, Dracula: Dead and Loving It, Fair Game, Canadian Bacon, Vampire in Brooklyn, The Scarlet Letter, Four Rooms, and 18 more; Notes: A bit higher notability than I would have expected (given the somewhat limited cast). When are we watching Under Siege 2?

Leonard Maltin – 2 stars – Sloppy assemblage of gags (with most of the good ones near the beginning) ostensibly about Ace’s anti-p.c. hijinks with battling African tribes while trying to locate a rare white bat. Clever opening spoof of Cliffhanger and a funny sight gag involving asparagus; otherwise, more of the same.

(Pretty much nails it. He gave the first 2 stars as well which I think is fair. Basically there the complaint was Carrey wouldn’t and couldn’t stop. That is very fair. The first is almost bursting at the seams trying to contain Carrey within a script not written for him. This one I think at least is written to accommodate his outlandish behavior.)

Trailer – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DfqPjRMsRP0/

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DfqPjRMsRP0/

(The trailer is pretty good because it tells you almost nothing about the story. The only issue I could have is displaying two of the more solid jokes (the asparagus gag, and the spears in the legs). Solid overall. I remember this trailer so vividly for the music.)

Directors – Steve Oedekerk – ( Future BMT: Barnyard; Kung Pow: Enter the Fist; Nothing to Lose; BMT: Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls; Notes: Wait … nominated for an Oscar? That’s right, he was nominated for Jimmy Neutron: Boy Genius in 2002. Some might recognize him as the star of Kung Pow: Enter the First.)

Writers – Jack Bernstein – ( Known For: Ace Ventura: Pet Detective; BMT: Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls; Notes: Mostly a television producing including 70 episodes of Royal Pains.)

Steve Oedekerk – ( Known For: Bruce Almighty; Cowboys & Aliens; The Nutty Professor; Jimmy Neutron: Boy Genius; High Strung; Future BMT: Evan Almighty; Patch Adams; Barnyard; Kung Pow: Enter the Fist; Nothing to Lose; BMT: Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls; Notes: He really lived off of that Jimmy Neutron gig for a while. Over 50 episodes of the television series, and then 20 more of a spinoff.)

Actors – Jim Carrey – ( Known For: Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind; The Truman Show; Sonic the Hedgehog 2; The Bad Batch; Sonic the Hedgehog; The Mask; Liar Liar; Dumb and Dumber; Ace Ventura: Pet Detective; Bruce Almighty; A Series of Unfortunate Events; Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues; Me, Myself & Irene; Horton Hears a Who!; The Cable Guy; How the Grinch Stole Christmas; Yes Man; Peggy Sue Got Married; Earth Girls Are Easy; The Dead Pool; Future BMT: Kick-Ass 2; Dumb and Dumber To; Fun with Dick and Jane; Once Bitten; The Incredible Burt Wonderstone; Pink Cadillac; BMT: Batman Forever; The Number 23; Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls; Notes: I looked this up after, but he really never had a big downturn in his career as I had thought. Only somewhat recently did he take some time off before getting the Robotnik role in Sonic.)

Ian McNeice – ( Known For: The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy; Valkyrie; Top Secret!; From Hell; No Escape; Valmont; Oliver Twist; Grizzly II: Revenge; A Life Less Ordinary; 84 Charing Cross Road; The Russia House; The Englishman Who Went Up a Hill But Came Down a Mountain; The Man Who Invented Christmas; Blackball; Personal Services; The Body; Funny Bones; The Cherry Orchard; The Fourth Angel; Whoops Apocalypse; Future BMT: The Black Dahlia; White Noise; The Beautician and the Beast; Year of the Comet; BMT: Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls; Around the World in 80 Days; Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason; Town & Country; Notes: Oddly his three children live in Africa, but this doesn’t seem to be connected to this movie somehow.)

Simon Callow – ( Known For: Amadeus; Notting Hill; A Room with a View; Four Weddings and a Funeral; Shakespeare in Love; James and the Giant Peach; Maurice; Howards End; Postcards from the Edge; Victoria & Abdul; Mindhorn; Arn: The Knight Templar; No Man’s Land; Viceroy’s House; Late Bloomers; Thunderpants; Blue Iguana; Hampstead; Bright Young Things; The Man Who Invented Christmas; Future BMT: The Phantom of the Opera; Street Fighter; BMT: Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls; Notes: Apparently he is an Orson Welles expert and biography.)

Budget/Gross – $30 million / Domestic: $108,385,533 (Worldwide: $212,385,533)

(I mean that is huge. I think Carrey was at a weird point in his career where this was his first sequel. Because he didn’t really do another one until the Dumb and Dumber sequel many years later.)

Rotten Tomatoes – 21% (6/28): Nature Calls in this Ace Ventura sequel, and it’s answered by the law of diminishing returns.

(Many of the complaints appear to be that Carrey is meaner in this film than the first, which I also think is correct. Again, the original was written without a solid grasp of the character who was written more as a zany take on noir detectives in general. In this they were grasping around trying to decide who this character was actually supposed to be.)

NY Times Short Review: Pet detective and sacred white bat. Sloppy, cheerfully gross sequel.

Poster – Ace Ventura: When Nature Sklogs

(It’s a classic. If the Ace Ventura 2 poster was a criminal that I was describing to a sketch artist it would have been caught in ten minutes. It’s not perfect or really artistic in any way, but nice font and that outfit is absolutely outrageous. B-)

Tagline(s) – New Animals. New Adventures. Same Hair (C-)

(Was the hair what everyone remembered most vividly from the first film? I guess maybe, although I never thought of it that way. This is a nicely constructed tagline, but boy is it lame.)

Keyword(s) – wisdom

Future BMT: 88.5 Dumb and Dumberer: When Harry Met Lloyd (2003), 84.0 Prom Night (2008), 83.5 Spy Kids 4: All the Time in the World (2011), 82.2 You Got Served (2004), 80.0 Jonas Brothers: The 3D Concert Experience (2009), 79.6 Nutty Professor II: The Klumps (2000), 78.8 Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chipwrecked (2011), 77.5 Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakquel (2009), 77.2 Superhero Movie (2008), 72.2 Bewitched (2005), 71.4 The Animal (2001), 69.3 College Road Trip (2008), 68.9 Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen (2004), 68.4 Poltergeist (2015), 68.2 Yogi Bear (2010), 67.6 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III (1993), 65.6 The Haunting of Molly Hartley (2008), 65.5 Halloween Ends (2022), 65.3 Fat Albert (2004), 65.0 Scary Movie 4 (2006)

BMT: Batman & Robin (1997), The Emoji Movie (2017), The Last Airbender (2010), Fifty Shades of Grey (2015), The Cat in the Hat (2003), Crossroads (2002), Norbit (2007), From Justin to Kelly (2003), The Master of Disguise (2002), Book of Shadows: Blair Witch 2 (2000), xXx: State of the Union (2005), Sex and the City 2 (2010), Space Jam: A New Legacy (2021), Aliens vs. Predator: Requiem (2007), Fifty Shades Freed (2018), The Twilight Saga: New Moon (2009), Little Man (2006), Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2 (2015), Taxi (2004), Freddy Got Fingered (2001), I Still Know What You Did Last Summer (1998), Zoolander 2 (2016), Kangaroo Jack (2003), Are We Done Yet? (2007), Police Academy 5: Assignment: Miami Beach (1988), The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn – Part 1 (2011), The Boy Next Door (2015), Wild Wild West (1999), Urban Legends: Final Cut (2000), Year One (2009), Are We There Yet? (2005), Big Momma’s House 2 (2006), Marmaduke (2010), The Roommate (2011), Tammy (2014), Abduction (2011), Miss Congeniality 2: Armed & Fabulous (2005), A Good Day to Die Hard (2013), Independence Day: Resurgence (2016), Transformers: The Last Knight (2017), New York Minute (2004), Hot Pursuit (2015), Paul Blart: Mall Cop (2009), Big Momma’s House (2000), An American Haunting (2005), …

Best Options (Comedy): 88.5 Dumb and Dumberer: When Harry Met Lloyd (2003), 83.5 Spy Kids 4: All the Time in the World (2011), 79.6 Nutty Professor II: The Klumps (2000), 78.8 Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chipwrecked (2011), 77.5 Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakquel (2009), 77.2 Superhero Movie (2008), 72.2 Bewitched (2005), 71.4 The Animal (2001), 69.3 College Road Trip (2008), 68.9 Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen (2004), 68.2 Yogi Bear (2010), 67.6 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III (1993), 65.3 Fat Albert (2004), 65.0 Scary Movie 4 (2006), 63.7 The Dukes of Hazzard (2005), 62.2 Madea Goes to Jail (2009), 61.5 Scooby-Doo (2002), 60.8 Like a Boss (2020), 60.8 Alvin and the Chipmunks (2007), 60.6 Meet Dave (2008), 60.4 Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Road Chip (2015), 58.7 Scary Movie 2 (2001), 57.5 Maid in Manhattan (2002), 57.2 The Wedding Planner (2001), 56.9 Hanging Up (2000), 56.8 Land of the Lost (2009), 55.3 The Back-up Plan (2010), 55.0 Evan Almighty (2007), 54.5 The Smurfs 2 (2013), 54.0 The Smurfs (2011), 53.9 Annie (2014), 53.1 Aloha (2015), 52.6 Just My Luck (2006), 52.1 Loser (2000), 52.0 Malibu’s Most Wanted (2003), 51.7 View from the Top (2003), 51.5 Scary Movie 3 (2003), 51.4 Dude, Where’s My Car? (2000), 51.0 Little Fockers (2010), 50.9 Couples Retreat (2009), 50.7 Racing Stripes (2005), 50.6 Eight Crazy Nights (2002), …

(Yeah there are too many really to list. Originally we were going to do Dumb and Dumberer but then we botched it. But Ace Ventura 2 is secretly amazing so I’m not too worked up about it.)

Welcome to Earf (HoE Number 14) – The shortest path through The Movie Database cast lists using only BMT films is: Jim Carrey is No. 1 billed in Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls and No. 1 billed in The Number 23, which also stars Virginia Madsen (No. 2 billed) who is in Firewall (No. 3 billed) which also stars Harrison Ford (No. 1 billed) who is in Hollywood Homicide (No. 1 billed) which also stars Josh Hartnett (No. 2 billed) who is in Here on Earth (No. 3 billed) => (1 + 1) + (2 + 3) + (1 + 1) + (2 + 3) = 14. There is no shorter path at the moment.

Notes – When driving to the consulate for the first time, Jim Carrey forgot his lines, so instead started singing the theme from the movie Chitty Chitty Bang Bang. Both actors stayed in character and the director loved it so they kept it in.

According to Simon Callow, Jim Carrey didn’t really want to make the film, which made on-set experiences awkward.

According to Jeff Daniels, Jim Carrey had explained to him the reasons why he didn’t like the sequel much. He disliked the whole “Ace is afraid of bats” angle, as he found it to be cheap, and even fought with the director about changing the script so that Ace was merely allergic to bats. Carrey was also very nervous about the film’s depiction of the native characters, and that people might take offense to them. He’s even surprised the film hasn’t been outright banned.

Jim Carrey spent a lot of time off sick, which affected the contract of actor Simon Callow. Callow’s contract had actually expired before he could finish filming his scenes. Despite this, he wasn’t paid overtime as Carrey’s illness was regarded as an “Act of God” in the contract. Which Carrey himself claims as “unfair”. Since Callow already had other commitments in London, the producers suggest he flew back regularly in first-class, as the contract had stated. It wasn’t until later that Callow found out that the producers were deducting the cost of his plane tickets from his overall salary. In his words he “finished up working almost for nothing”.

Despite Jim Carrey only doing this movie due to contractual obligation, the studio attempted to get him interested in doing another Ace Ventura movie several times throughout the years to which he declined.

Jim Carrey was paid $15 million to reprise the part of Ace Ventura, exactly half of the film’s $30 million budget. It was actually the film’s writer and Carrey’s friend Steve Oedekerk who suggested he’d negotiate with Morgan Creek Productions for this. Conveniently, Oedekerk himself became the film’s director, who then finalized this decision.

Up until Dumb and Dumber To (2014), this was the only sequel to a Jim Carrey film to actually feature Carrey, Likewise none of the actors with the exception of Carrey return from the first film.

Jim Carrey said that after doing this movie he realized he could not spend his entire life doing Ace Ventura movies. Writer/director Steve Oedekerk felt the same way, and also moved onto other projects.

The language used by the Wachootoo chief and in Ouda’s Wachootoo translation is isiXhosa, an Nguni language spoken in South Africa. IsiXhosa is the native language of Nelson Mandela and Miriam Makeba a.k.a. Mama Africa. The Xhosa people (amaXhosa) make up the second largest ethnic group in South Africa after their close relatives the Zulus (amaZulu).

Poltergeist III Preview

Jamie and Patrick are playing with their favorite toy dinosaurs. They’re mother stops by and pats them lovingly on the head. They’re father stoops down and spends some moments joining in on the imaginary fun. Jamie strains to see his father’s face but it’s clouded by an image of Scott Bakula. Imposter! But the joy of this dino adventure is enough and they continue to play together: Patrick, Jamie, and their imposter dad Scott Bakula. There is a knock at the door and there are two men in suits there. They are talking to Scott Bakula. They are pointing at a sheet of paper that says that all their measurables are off the charts. General Knowledge: 100th percentile. Gymnastics: 100th percentile. Martial Arts: 100th percentile. Dance: 100th percentile. Philosophy: 100th percentile. The list goes on and on. They frown at the list. Dinosaurs: 100th percentile is nowhere to be found. Not a list they care about. The men tell them they are going away, going to have everything because of this list. They cry. They hit these men with their dinosaur toys and try to run away.

Jamie shakes his head at the memory and jerks his arm away from Patrick and grabs one of the toy cars. “Michael!” he calls and the groundskeeper turns. “Why are these toys here? Whose toys are these?” he asks, his voice shaking with intensity. Michael chuckles a little. “Ah, so that’s what you’re sniffing around about. You’ve heard the stories,” he says but starts a little when he realizes they don’t know what he’s talking about. “You’re saying you’ve never heard the story of how this place is haunted?” Patrick and Jamie look at each other and shakily murmur, “A gh-gh-gh-ghost?” Michael nods. “Not just one ghost,” he continues, “Two.” That’s right! We’re watching not just one ghost film, but two. And they’re some big ones. We are tackling the two very poorly received sequels Poltergeist II: The Other Side and Poltergeist III… no subtitle for three, guys? That’s a shame. How about Poltergeist III: Tower of Terror? Let’s go!

Poltergeist III (1988) – BMeTric: 64.0; Notability: 34

StreetCreditReport.com – BMeTric: top 1.6%; Notability: top 10.4%; Rotten Tomatoes: top 9.0%; Higher BMeT: Caddyshack II, Mac and Me, Police Academy 5: Assignment: Miami Beach, Poltergeist III; Higher Notability: Action Jackson, Sunset, High Spirits, Big Top Pee-wee, Caddyshack II, My Stepmother Is an Alien, Moving, Cocoon: The Return, The Couch Trip, License to Drive, Vibes, Cocktail, Arthur 2: On the Rocks, Hot to Trot, The Seventh Sign, Mac and Me, Police Academy 5: Assignment: Miami Beach, Bad Dreams, The Presidio, Short Circuit 2, and 6 more; Lower RT: Two Moon Junction, Police Academy 5: Assignment: Miami Beach, Johnny Be Good, Fresh Horses, Watchers, Return of the Killer Tomatoes!, Hero and the Terror, Hot to Trot, Illegally Yours, The Blue Iguana, War Party, Caddyshack II, Return of the Living Dead II, Mac and Me, Cocktail, Dead Heat, Vibes, Arthur 2: On the Rocks, Action Jackson, The Prince of Pennsylvania, and 2 more; Notes: Much lower Notability, much cheaper movie, much worse experience. It looks like maybe we probably watched the top five BMeTric of 1988. I wonder how many years we can say that about.

Leonard Maltin – 2 stars – O’Rourke moves in with uncle Skerritt and aunt Allen – and is still pursued by strange evil forces. Undistinguished and occasionally plodding; eerily young O’Rourke died four months before the film’s release.

(Absurd. This movie is terrible. Just horrifically bad. I could maybe understand if it you gave a shoutout to the surprisingly good debut by Lara Flynn Boyle, but I just don’t get 2 stars here. It feels like someone didn’t watch this film.)

Trailer – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_lCfugr2qJU/

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_lCfugr2qJU/

(Oh shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit, Poltergeist in the city yo! Clearly a very very Chicago film … terrible trailer though. Literally shows nothing scary, just floating through the city. That’s it.)

Directors – Gary Sherman – ( Known For: Dead & Buried; Vice Squad; Death Line; Lisa; 39: A Film by Carroll McKane; Future BMT: Wanted: Dead or Alive; BMT: Poltergeist III; Notes: He used to basically make music videos prior to music videos being thing. Was a television commercial director prior to working in film and on television shows.)

Writers – Gary Sherman – ( Known For: Death Line; Lisa; Phobia; Future BMT: Wanted: Dead or Alive; BMT: Poltergeist III; Notes: Back in the 90s he wrote and directed and produced a procedural called Missing Persons. He also wrote an episode of the Poltergeist television series.)

Brian Taggert – ( Known For: The New Kids; Of Unknown Origin; Future BMT: Wanted: Dead or Alive; Visiting Hours; BMT: Poltergeist III; Notes: He had a long history of horror writing, including eventually Omen IV and Trucks, the television remake of Maximum Overdrive.)

Steve Feke – ( Known For: When a Stranger Calls; Hadley’s Rebellion; Future BMT: When a Stranger Calls; BMT: Mac and Me; Razzie Notes: Nominee for Worst Screenplay for Mac and Me in 1989; Notes: Huge television writer in the 90s. Uncredited on this, probably was too busy working on Mac and Me.)

Actors – Heather O’Rourke – ( Known For: Poltergeist; BMT: Poltergeist II: The Other Side; Poltergeist III; Notes: Wow, top billing. She’s incredible in the first film, some of the finest child acting (at least for someone that young) ever. Given things like E.T. I imagine a lot of that has to do with Spielberg who, for whatever reason, seems incredibly good at guiding child performers.)

Tom Skerritt – ( Known For: Top Gun; Alien; Steel Magnolias; Ted; Contact; A River Runs Through It; M*A*S*H; The Dead Zone; Harold and Maude; Poison Ivy; Singles; Up in Smoke; Ice Castles; SpaceCamp; A Hologram for the King; Big Bad Mama; Lucky; Smoke Signals; Wild Orchid II: Two Shades of Blue; The Devil’s Rain; Future BMT: Tears of the Sun; The Rookie; The Other Sister; Fighting Back; BMT: Whiteout; Poltergeist III; Texas Rangers; Notes: Won an Emmy for Picket fences (nominated twice). He is a force to reckoned with in 90s direct-to-video and TV Movie work as well.)

Nancy Allen – ( Known For: RoboCop; Carrie; Out of Sight; Dressed to Kill; Blow Out; 1941; The Last Detail; The Philadelphia Experiment; I Wanna Hold Your Hand; Strange Invaders; Home Movies; The Buddy System; The Last Victim; Acting on Impulse; The Patriots; Not for Publication; Sweet Revenge; Kiss Toledo Goodbye; Against the Law; Circuit; BMT: RoboCop 2; RoboCop 3; Poltergeist III; Razzie Notes: Nominee for Worst Actress for Dressed to Kill in 1981; Notes: Was married to Brian De Palma for a hot second. Apparently she’s also the cousin of Jim Breuer.)

Budget/Gross – $9.5 million / Domestic: $14,114,488 (Worldwide: $14,114,488)

(See, they dropped the budget, but then it didn’t end up doing nearly as well. If it could have pulled $20 I bet they would have tried to reboot the whole thing with Kane terrorizing some other family. Probably try and keep with the eeeeeevil techmology angle.)

Rotten Tomatoes – 16% (3/19)

(Fine, I’ll make my own consensus: Impressive camera trickery involving mirrors aside, the movie is a catastrophically soulless schlock.)

NY Times Short Review: The weakest yet.

Poster – Ghosty Spooktacular III: Lightning City

(This poster is bad but also I kind of want to hang it in my imaginary man cave. Fuck it, I’m giving it a B.)

Tagline(s) – No matter where Carol Anne goes… she never goes alone. (F)

(Noooooope. That is long and hurts my ears. It’s so clunky that the poster is better off not having a tagline than that tagline and that’s a crime.)

Keyword(s) – Citizen Kane

Top 10: The Silence of the Lambs (1991), Star Wars: Episode V – The Empire Strikes Back (1980), Goodfellas (1990), Terminator 2: Judgment Day (1991), Star Wars: Episode VI – Return of the Jedi (1983), The Terminator (1984), Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade (1989), Full Metal Jacket (1987), Aliens (1986), Groundhog Day (1993)

Future BMT: 75.0 Look Who’s Talking Now (1993), 71.9 Teen Wolf Too (1987), 61.0 Pet Sematary II (1992), 59.6 Suburban Commando (1991), 58.5 Rocky V (1990), 56.4 The Karate Kid Part III (1989), 55.6 Ringmaster (1998), 54.2 Who’s That Girl (1987), 53.2 Made in America (1993), 52.4 Blank Check (1994), 51.5 The Pest (1997), 50.5 Getting Even with Dad (1994), 50.0 Smokey and the Bandit II (1980), 49.9 3 Ninjas (1992), 49.1 My Girl 2 (1994), 48.3 My Stepmother Is an Alien (1988), 47.9 Three Men and a Little Lady (1990), 46.7 House Party 3 (1994), 46.4 Zapped! (1982), 45.8 Sidekicks (1992)

BMT: Batman & Robin (1997), Superman IV: The Quest for Peace (1987), Troll 2 (1990), Super Mario Bros. (1993), RoboCop 3 (1993), Grease 2 (1982), Caddyshack II (1988), Bio-Dome (1996), Mac and Me (1988), Anaconda (1997), Lawnmower Man 2: Beyond Cyberspace (1996), Double Team (1997), Fair Game (1995), Leprechaun (1993), Body of Evidence (1992), A Nightmare on Elm Street: The Dream Child (1989), Cool World (1992), Poltergeist III (1988), Wild Orchid (1989), Sliver (1993), Chairman of the Board (1997), Red Sonja (1985), Nothing But Trouble (1991), Ishtar (1987), Toys (1992), Weekend at Bernie’s II (1993), Shanghai Surprise (1986), Friday the 13th Part VII: The New Blood (1988), Exit to Eden (1994), Fire Down Below (1997), Color of Night (1994), Graveyard Shift (1990), No Holds Barred (1989), The Lawnmower Man (1992), Arthur 2: On the Rocks (1988), Maximum Overdrive (1986), Fire Birds (1990), Cocoon: The Return (1988), Jingle All the Way (1996), Raw Deal (1986), Poltergeist II: The Other Side (1986), Crocodile Dundee II (1988), Hudson Hawk (1991), Navy Seals (1990), Critters 2: The Main Course (1988), Hot to Trot (1988), Rambo III (1988), Terminal Velocity (1994), Meatballs Part II (1984), Cobra (1986), Ernest Goes to Jail (1990), Hard to Kill (1990), Conan the Destroyer (1984), The Golden Child (1986), Another 48 Hrs. (1990), Hard Rain (1998), Under the Cherry Moon (1986), Mannequin (1987), K-9 (1989), Days of Thunder (1990), Blame It on Rio (1984), No Mercy (1986), Senseless (1998), The Wizard (1989), The Marrying Man (1991), Sleeping with the Enemy (1991), The Cannonball Run (1981), Stone Cold (1991), Tango & Cash (1989), Lock Up (1989), The Good Son (1993), 1492: Conquest of Paradise (1992), Dangerous Minds (1995), Young Guns II (1990), Event Horizon (1997), Dutch (1991), Police Academy (1984), Road House (1989)

Best Options (Horror): 64.2 Poltergeist III (1988), 61.0 Pet Sematary II (1992), 44.3 DeepStar Six (1989), 42.3 Poltergeist II: The Other Side (1986), 34.6 Leviathan (1989), 32.2 The Seventh Sign (1988), 31.3 Student Bodies (1981), 28.1 Deep Rising (1998), 27.4 The Phantom of the Opera (1989), 26.1 The Bride (1985), 25.0 Bad Dreams (1988)

(Bam, finally. We finally hit up the top spot for one of these. And we love franchises, Jamie is the self-appointed Franchise Man. So this seemed like a perfect choice.)

Welcome to Earf (HoE Number 13) – The shortest path through The Movie Database cast lists using only BMT films is: Tom Skerritt is No. 1 billed in Poltergeist III and No. 3 billed in Whiteout, which also stars Kate Beckinsale (No. 1 billed) who is in Pearl Harbor (No. 2 billed) which also stars Josh Hartnett (No. 3 billed) who is in Here on Earth (No. 3 billed) => (1 + 3) + (1 + 2) + (3 + 3) = 13. There is no shorter path at the moment.

Notes – Craig T. Nelson was approached to play Steve Freeling again, but he declined. “Two was enough” he says.

Following the death of Heather O’Rourke in February of 1988 after she finished her work on the film (April-June 1987), it was the decision of director Gary Sherman to temporarily shelve the project during its post-production phase. However, due to the amount of money that had already been spent, MGM insisted that the film be finished and released as scheduled for June of 1988 or they would find someone else to do it. Apparently, after the film was given a PG rating by the MPAA in November 1987, the studio had already decided to have Sherman re-shoot the ending with more graphic scenes, in order to “up” the rating to PG-13. Planning for this re-shoot began in December 1987 and continued into January 1988, but was temporarily put on hold when O’Rourke died Feb. 1. The re-shoot (which used a stand-in for Heather) eventually took place in March, and the film was then “re-edited” and given a PG-13 by the MPAA in April 1988. Director Sherman would later claim that no such “re-shoot” took place, instead insisting that Heather died before they could film the “original ending” and that the current ending using the body double was what they hastily threw together when forced to “finish” the film by MGM. However, he is contradicted by at least six other people who also worked on the film who confirmed that the original ending was in fact filmed before Heather died and that the re-shoot of the ending took place after her passing. These people include producer Barry Bernardi, actor Kipley Wentz, assistant editor Jeanne Bonansinga, composer Joe Renzetti, special effects makeup artist Doug Drexler and the man who provided the voice for the Rev. Kane, Corey Burton. His claims would ultimately be proven false by the Collector’s Edition Blu-ray release by Scream Factory, where the original film elements and the missing footage were discovered in a vault for a 4K restoration, including the original ending which Sherman denied ever existed. This Blu-ray release, as of 2020, has since gone out of print.

After filming of the scene where the cars chase Patricia and Bruce, the car’s explosion set the entire set on fire, almost taking a crew member and a few cameras he was rescuing. When Heather O’Rourke showed up for filming the next day and heard about the incident from director Gary Sherman, she was relieved that no one was hurt. She then asked Sherman, “Did you get the shot?”

Heather O’Rourke (Carol Anne) and Zelda Rubinstein (Tangina) are the only two actors to appear in all three Poltergeist films.

Heather O’Rourke’s bloated appearance in the film was the result of a misdiagnosis of her medical condition, which led to her being prescribed the wrong medication. This particular medication caused her body to swell and her face to get puffy.

Lara Flynn Boyle’s film debut.

There were originally plans for Craig T. Nelson to return for a Poltergeist 4, but the death of Heather O’Rourke, the ensuing media scandal about the Poltergeist curse that overshadowed pretty much everything else about the movie, the recurring deaths of actors involved in the film series, and the disappointing box office returns from Poltergeist III (1988) dissuaded the producers from continuing the franchise, and it ultimately ended at 3 films. The film series was ultimately rebooted with Poltergeist (2015), a remake of the original, but neither Nelson nor any of the series’ principle cast members made an appearance.

A theme running throughout this movie is that mirrors contain the spirits, meaning there are many shots where everything is reflected perfectly except for one startling aberration. This was achieved via a few different methods, such as split screen and travelling mattes, however the most commonly used method was room doubling. The ‘mirror’ isn’t there, there is instead constructed a perfect mirror image room connected to the foreground one that begins where the mirror should be, and the actors have body doubles with their backs to camera who imitate their motions. A metronome was running throughout those body double scenes in order to help the performers act in synchronicity. A simple theatrical technique, done well, that repeatedly gives an unnerving paranormal effect.

According to the film’s supervising dialogue editor, Corey Burton smoked half a pack of cigarettes before recording his lines as Henry Kane, in order to achieve the required raspy quality, and then kept smoking throughout the recording session.

In this film alone, Carol Anne’s name is spoken a total of 121 times. Much is said about the ridiculous number of times that the name “Carol Anne” is spoken in the movie.

Awards – Nominee for the Razzie Award for Worst Supporting Actress (Zelda Rubinstein, 1989)

Poltergeist II: The Other Side Preview

Jamie and Patrick are playing with their favorite toy dinosaurs. They’re mother stops by and pats them lovingly on the head. They’re father stoops down and spends some moments joining in on the imaginary fun. Jamie strains to see his father’s face but it’s clouded by an image of Scott Bakula. But the joy of this dino adventure is enough and they continue to play together: Patrick, Jamie, and their imposter dad Scott Bakula. There is a knock at the door and there are two men in suits there. They are talking to Scott Bakula. They are pointing at a sheet of paper that says that all their measurables are off the charts. General Knowledge: 100th percentile. Gymnastics: 100th percentile. Martial Arts: 100th percentile. Dance: 100th percentile. Philosophy: 100th percentile. The list goes on and on. They frown at the list. Dinosaurs: 100th percentile is nowhere to be found. Not a list they care about. The men tell them they are going away, going to have everything because of this list. They cry. They hit these men with their dinosaur toys and try to run away.

Jamie shakes his head at the memory and jerks his arm away from Patrick and grabs one of the toy cars. “Michael!” he calls and the groundskeeper turns. “Why are these toys here? Whose toys are these?” he asks, his voice shaking with intensity. Michael chuckles a little. “Ah, so that’s what you’re sniffing around about. You’ve heard the stories,” he says but starts a little when he realizes they don’t know what he’s talking about. “You’re saying you’ve never heard the story of how this place is haunted?” Patrick and Jamie look at each other and shakily murmur, “A gh-gh-gh-ghost?” Michael nods. “Not just one ghost,” he continues, “Two.” That’s right! We’re watching not just one ghost film, but two. And they’re some big ones. We are tackling the two very poorly received sequels to Poltergeist, Poltergeist II: The Other Side and Poltergeist III… no subtitle for three, guys? That’s a shame. How about Poltergeist III: Tower of Terror? Let’s go!

Poltergeist II: The Other Side (1986) – BMeTric: 42.3; Notability: 64

StreetCreditReport.com – BMeTric: top 2.8%; Notability: top 1.2%; Rotten Tomatoes: top 10.7%; Higher BMeT: Howard the Duck, Troll, King Kong Lives, Maximum Overdrive, Raw Deal, Solarbabies, Poltergeist II: The Other Side; Higher Notability: Jumpin’ Jack Flash, Howard the Duck, The Golden Child; Lower RT: Solarbabies, 8 Million Ways to Die, King Kong Lives, Band of the Hand, American Anthem, Sorority House Massacre, Deadtime Stories, Nobody’s Fool, Firewalker, The Clan of the Cave Bear, Armed and Dangerous, TerrorVision, Dangerously Close, Club Paradise, Quicksilver, Soul Man, Howard the Duck, Tai-Pan, Maximum Overdrive, The Delta Force, and 4 more; Notes: The Notability is shockingly high on this one, but the cast is kind of stacked too, so I guess it makes sense. Jumpin’ Jack Flash has been on my radar forever. The old Whoopi films from the 80s are something else.

Leonard Maltin – 2.5 stars – The Freeling family is terrorized again by otherworld creatures. Another pointless sequel made palatable by some jolting state-of-the-art special effects and a still-very-likable family. Be warned that an actor receives billing as The Vomit Creature.

(This does seem, potentially, to be a series that would be mostly a display for impressive special effects and not much else. It is pointless though, the first film was wrapped up in a neat bow.)

Trailer – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mjhr8EdGyD0/

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mjhr8EdGyD0/

(Oh snap, first shot, the big baddy … Kane? Wait, was this guy in the first film? No? What is happening!? That being said, pretty solid teaser trailer all said.)

Directors – Brian Gibson – ( Known For: What’s Love Got to Do with It; The Juror; Still Crazy; Breaking Glass; BMT: Poltergeist II: The Other Side; Notes: Worked for the BBC initially, then it appears he did a bunch of music videos. This followed right after a series of music videos by Styx. Won and Emmy for The Josephine Baker Story.)

Writers – Mark Victor and Michael Grais – ( Known For: Poltergeist; Death Hunt; Future BMT: Marked for Death; BMT: Cool World; Poltergeist II: The Other Side; Notes: Kind of odd they didn’t seem to get a credit for Poltergeist III. They wrote a trilogy of UFO TV Movies in 1991.)

Actors – JoBeth Williams – ( Known For: Poltergeist; The Big Chill; Kramer vs. Kramer; Stir Crazy; The Big Year; Fever Pitch; In the Land of Women; The Dogs of War; Teachers; Timer; Alex & The List; Desert Bloom; Memories of Me; Endangered Species; SGT. Will Gardner; The Last Film Festival; Barracuda; Me Myself and I; Welcome Home; Just Write; Future BMT: Wyatt Earp; Switch; American Dreamer; BMT: Jungle 2 Jungle; Poltergeist II: The Other Side; Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot; Dutch; Notes: Her husband was the director of Miss Congeniality 2 among other BMT films. She was nominated for an Oscar for On Hope, a short film.)

Craig T. Nelson – ( Known For: The Devil’s Advocate; The Incredibles; The Proposal; Incredibles 2; Poltergeist; Blades of Glory; The Killing Fields; Book Club; Wag the Dog; Soul Surfer; Gold; All the Right Moves; Stir Crazy; The Osterman Weekend; Silkwood; The Company Men; Private Benjamin; Turner & Hooch; The Family Stone; And Justice for All; Future BMT: Troop Beverly Hills; Get Hard; Action Jackson; BMT: Poltergeist II: The Other Side; The Skulls; Notes: It’s Coach! Races cars. Was nominated three times for Coach, and won once.)

Heather O’Rourke – ( Known For: Poltergeist; BMT: Poltergeist II: The Other Side; Poltergeist III; Notes: Sadly died during post-production of Poltergeist III from complications related to Crohn’s Disease.)

Budget/Gross – $19 million / Domestic: $40,996,665 (Worldwide: $40,996,665)

(That’s good enough. Horror films just print money as usual. So no wonder they went straight for the third. I do wonder if you could get a direct sequel off the ground, recasting O’Rourke’s character as an adult.)

Rotten Tomatoes – 20% (11/55): They’re back, but this hollow sequel retains none of the charm or suspense that made the original Poltergeist such a haunting specter.

(Yeah, that makes sense. But when does any sequel? I guess something like The Conjuring at the very least kept the same entertaining level of zaniness during its sequels. So it is possible.)

NY Times Short Review: Plot trouble.

Poster – Ghosty Spooktacular II: The Other Sklog

(Ha, what? This poster is crazy. Did they finish it? I’m going to give them an Incomplete.)

Tagline(s) – They’re back. (B)

(I can’t actually give this a particularly good grade, but I also can’t blame them for putting away the easy lay-up. Just solid fundamentals here.)

Keyword(s) – Citizen Kane

Best Options (Horror): 64.2 Poltergeist III (1988), 61.0 Pet Sematary II (1992), 44.3 DeepStar Six (1989), 42.3 Poltergeist II: The Other Side (1986), 34.6 Leviathan (1989), 32.2 The Seventh Sign (1988), 31.3 Student Bodies (1981), 28.1 Deep Rising (1998), 27.4 The Phantom of the Opera (1989), 26.1 The Bride (1985), 25.0 Bad Dreams (1988)

(Yeah we hit up a good one here. There was an off-the-board alternative, specifically we could have hit up the second and third Amityville and gone down that freight path of six non-qualifying direct-to-video sequels. We chose not to.)

Welcome to Earf (HoE Number 14) – The shortest path through The Movie Database cast lists using only BMT films is: JoBeth Williams is No. 2 billed in Poltergeist II: The Other Side and No. 3 billed in Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot, which also stars Sylvester Stallone (No. 1 billed) who is in The Expendables 3 (No. 1 billed) which also stars Jason Statham (No. 2 billed) who is in In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale (No. 1 billed) which also stars Leelee Sobieski (No. 3 billed) who is in Here on Earth (No. 1 billed) => (2 + 3) + (1 + 1) + (2 + 1) + (3 + 1) = 14. If we were to watch The Glass House we can get the HoE Number down to 13.

Notes – The only family member absent from the film is Dana, who according to the script is off at university, but a scene explaining away her absence was never filmed. Dominique Dunne was murdered by her boyfriend John Thomas Sweeney (who later changed his name to John Maura and disappeared) shortly after “Poltergeist (1982)” premiered. Ultimately, no mention is made of Dana in the final film, or of her being in college. It was decided by the filmmakers to retire the character and not recast her out of respect for the deceased actress and her family.

The partially grown “Vomit Creature” was performed by stuntman Noble Craig, a triple-amputee who lost both legs, an arm, and an eye while serving in the Vietnam War.

Heather O’Rourke was so afraid of Julian Beck (Reverend Kane) the first time she saw him that she burst into tears.

Julian Beck’s gaunt appearance is the result of the stomach cancer that would claim his life.

The film had an original running time of 131 minutes before being edited down to 91 minutes. Some have surmised that MGM rushed production and ordered the cuts, e.g the final battle with Kane lasts all of two minutes. Zelda Rubinstein in particular was furious about this, as she felt her best scenes were removed from the final cut.

H.R. Giger provided the special effects designs. Giger created several designs but only two made it into the film, albeit briefly. Some books on his art report that Giger was “very unhappy” with how his designs were translated to the film.

The exorcism was performed by Will Sampson, who was a real-life shaman for “several different groups” before his death in 1987. Studio security was instructed to leave the set unlocked and unguarded so Sampson could return in the middle of the night to perform the exorcism.

Several scenes that appeared in press stills and promotional posters were cut from the film, e.g. one in which Kane tries to get into the house a second time and confronts Tangina (this omission angered Rubinstein as she felt that was one of her best scenes); one in which Steve and Diane see a flying toaster during a breakfast scene, etc.

The film was at one point to have been filmed in 3D; several scenes such as the appearance of the Beast and the flying chainsaw were filmed to take advantage of the process. This idea was eventually abandoned after seeing the failures of other gimmicky 3D horror films of the decade, including Friday the 13th Part III (1982), Jaws 3-D (1983), and Amityville 3-D (1983), which was a previous flop from MGM.

Awards – Nominee for the Oscar for Best Effects, Visual Effects (Richard Edlund, John Bruno, Garry Waller, Bill Neil, 1987)

Nominee for the Razzie Award for Worst Supporting Actress (Zelda Rubinstein, 1987)

Cocoon: The Return Preview

“This is not good,” Jamie says as they eye the sign that reads “Dudikoff Center for Bad Movie Rehabilitation.” It was their only choice after being confronted with Scott Bakula and their friends and family. Scott explained how he actually wasn’t killed by a demon monster like they thought. “It was all part of my own bad movie addiction, same with pretending to be your father. I’m sorry. But here… this is what saved me. What can save you, too,” he said before handing them a brochure for the Dudikoff Center. They had agreed. Good Movie Twins and Citizen Kane would have to go on hold while they do what needs to be done. When they walk into the center, though, they are surprised to find that they have one task before going to their first meeting: watch Citizen Kane. They smile. Maybe this will work out after all. They head to their room and fire up the DVD player, but just as they get to the part where some old fuddy duddy drops a snow globe like a dope they hear a crack on the glass of their window. They hear it again and head over to check out what’s going on. Far below in them in the courtyard is none other than Steve Guttenberg. “Yo Gutes, what you doing here?” Jamie calls down to him. “Same as you,” he says shrugging, “I heard you were here and I got something to show you.” Jamie begins to turn from the window and Patrick grabs his arm. “We don’t have time to do this,” he hisses, “we are here to watch CK and get back to business.” But Jamie yanks his arm away. “It’s the Gutes,” he says in disgust, “he’s back… and he needs our help.” That’s right! We’re watching Cocoon: The Return, the sequel to the surprise Ron Howard hit. The Gutes is back, Jack and palling around with a bunch of aliens and old people. Not sure which is scarier, heeeyyyyy-oooooo. Let’s go!

Cocoon: The Return (1988) – BMeTric: 44.7; Notability: 50

StreetCreditReport.com – BMeTric: top 4.4%; Notability: top 2.0%; Rotten Tomatoes: top 14.4%; Higher BMeT: Caddyshack II, Mac and Me, Police Academy 5: Assignment: Miami Beach, Poltergeist III, Friday the 13th Part VII: The New Blood, Johnny Be Good, Alien from L.A., Arthur 2: On the Rocks, My Stepmother Is an Alien, Big Top Pee-wee, Red Scorpion; Higher Notability: Sunset, High Spirits, Big Top Pee-wee, Caddyshack II, My Stepmother Is an Alien; Lower RT: Two Moon Junction, Johnny Be Good, Police Academy 5: Assignment: Miami Beach, Fresh Horses, Return of the Killer Tomatoes!, Watchers, Illegally Yours, Hot to Trot, Caddyshack II, Return of the Living Dead II, Mac and Me, Cocktail, Dead Heat, Vibes, Arthur 2: On the Rocks, The Prince of Pennsylvania, The Seventh Sign, 976-EVIL, The New Adventures of Pippi Longstocking, Poltergeist III, and 15 more; Notes: That is a nice notability I must say. Still a long way to go with 1988 according to the BMeTric though.

RogerEbert.com – 2.5 stars – At the end of “Cocoon,” some senior citizens were lifted into the sky by a beam of light from a hovering spacecraft and taken to live on a planet where nobody ever got tired, and nobody ever grew old. Now they are back on Earth. Why did they return from their other-worldly paradise? It is too easy to give the cynical answer – because they were needed for the sequel – but I am afraid the movie comes up with no better justification.

(Ha! Sounds about right. The first film doesn’t really bother answering a bunch of questions as well, so making a sequel might have been a bit of an own goal at times. How is Guttenberg not in jail for example … he killed like 30 old people (the authorities would be absolutely convinced of this).)

Trailer – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_refo9m6Pvs/

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_refo9m6Pvs/

(BASKETBALL SCENE ALERT. Add it to the spreadsheet boys. But also, what is up with the trailer. The picture was changing ratio a bunch and was also rounded corners like it was a projector image or something. Odd stuff.)

Directors – Daniel Petrie – ( Known For: Lifeguard; Six Pack; A Raisin in the Sun; Fort Apache the Bronx; Lassie; Resurrection; The Betsy; Rocket Gibraltar; The Bay Boy; Buster and Billie; Square Dance; The Neptune Factor; The Idol; Stolen Hours; The Spy with a Cold Nose; The Bramble Bush; The Main Attraction; The Assistant; BMT: Cocoon: The Return; Notes: Nominated for 9 Emmys and won 3, all for like specials or children’s programs and stuff. His son is a famous screenwriter, he wrote Beverly Hills Cop.)

Writers – David Saperstein – ( Known For: Cocoon; Beyond the Stars; A Killing Affair; BMT: Cocoon: The Return; Notes: A holdover from Cocoon. He also maybe wrote the TMNT Coming Out of Their Shell Tour? A little unclear, he was involved.)

Stephen McPherson – ( BMT: Cocoon: The Return; Notes: Mostly a TV writer, including an episode of the Poltergeist: The Legacy television series.)

Elizabeth Bradley – ( BMT: Cocoon: The Return; Notes: Did a bunch of stuff on television around the time, like script supervision. Also wrote a TV Movie with McPherson called Secrets of the Bermuda Triangle.)

Actors – Don Ameche – ( Known For: Trading Places; Coming to America; Homeward Bound: The Incredible Journey; Cocoon; Harry and the Hendersons; Heaven Can Wait; Midnight; Sleep, My Love; Things Change; Love Is News; The Boatniks; In Old Chicago; Wing and a Prayer; Picture Mommy Dead; Slightly French; Alexander’s Ragtime Band; The Story of Alexander Graham Bell; Moon Over Miami; Suppose They Gave a War and Nobody Came; The Three Musketeers; Future BMT: Corrina, Corrina; Folks!; BMT: Oscar; Cocoon: The Return; Notes: Don Ameche won the Oscar for Supporting Actor for Cocoon … won. Not nominated. He won it. He’s also famous for Trading Places, as the voice of Shadow in Homeward Bound, and in the past for Heaven Can Wait.)

Wilford Brimley – ( Known For: The Thing; Cocoon; The Firm; The Natural; True Grit; Hard Target; Remo Williams: The Adventure Begins; In & Out; Tender Mercies; My Fellow Americans; The China Syndrome; 10 to Midnight; Absence of Malice; Last of the Dogmen; Brubaker; The Hotel New Hampshire; High Road to China; Lawman; The Electric Horseman; Borderline; Future BMT: Harry & Son; BMT: Did You Hear About the Morgans?; Cocoon: The Return; Notes: He was very notably much younger than the rest of the Cocoon cast. He is probably most famous, oddly, for the Liberty Medical commercials he did for years.)

Courteney Cox – ( Known For: Scream VI; Scream; Scream; Scream 4; Scream 2; Scream 3; Ace Ventura: Pet Detective; The Tripper; Mothers and Daughters; Down Twisted; The Runner; The Shrink Is In; November; Commandments; Blue Desert; Shaking the Tree; Future BMT: The Longest Yard; Bedtime Stories; Zoom; Barnyard; Mr. Destiny; The Opposite Sex and How to Live with Them; BMT: Masters of the Universe; 3000 Miles to Graceland; Cocoon: The Return; Razzie Notes: Nominee for Worst Supporting Actress, and Worst Screen Couple for 3000 Miles to Graceland in 2002; Notes: Kind of insane but she was nominated for one Emmy ever … for the Friends: Reunion Special. She was never nominated for Friends. The rest of the cast were all nominated at least once, although Matthew Perry and David Schwimmer both once each fairly late into the run.)

Budget/Gross – $17.5 million / Domestic: $18,924,919 (Worldwide: $25,024,919)

(Given the budget that is maybe not at bad as I would expect. I guess I would have figured it would have had a higher cast cost.)

Rotten Tomatoes – 31% (4/13)

(Ah sweet I get to make a consensus: Lacking a raison d’etre, Cocoon: The Return mostly just feels like the first one done again for no reason.)

NY Times Short Review: Disappointing Sequel.

Poster – Old People & Aliens 2: Even Older

(I wish they didn’t have the pictures at the bottom. It’s kinda nice otherwise. Good colors and artistic. Given some credit to the font since they carry over the linked O’s from the first film. Not bad. B+.)

Tagline(s) – This holiday season, journey to the most wonderful place in the universe… home. (B-)

(Like the poster they need to knock off the front of this one and then it would be way better. With that tacked on it’s lamer and too long. I think I would have really liked it if that wasn’t there so it still gets a decent grade.)

Keyword(s) – Citizen Kane

Future BMT: 75.0 Look Who’s Talking Now (1993), 71.9 Teen Wolf Too (1987), 64.2 Poltergeist III (1988), 61.0 Pet Sematary II (1992), 59.6 Suburban Commando (1991), 58.5 Rocky V (1990), 56.4 The Karate Kid Part III (1989), 55.6 Ringmaster (1998), 54.1 Who’s That Girl (1987), 53.2 Made in America (1993), 52.4 Blank Check (1994), 51.5 The Pest (1997), 50.5 Getting Even with Dad (1994), 50.0 Smokey and the Bandit II (1980), 49.9 3 Ninjas (1992), 49.1 My Girl 2 (1994), 48.3 My Stepmother Is an Alien (1988), 47.9 Three Men and a Little Lady (1990), 46.7 House Party 3 (1994), 46.3 Zapped! (1982)

BMT: Batman & Robin (1997), Superman IV: The Quest for Peace (1987), Troll 2 (1990), Super Mario Bros. (1993), RoboCop 3 (1993), Grease 2 (1982), Caddyshack II (1988), Bio-Dome (1996), Mac and Me (1988), Anaconda (1997), Lawnmower Man 2: Beyond Cyberspace (1996), Double Team (1997), Fair Game (1995), Leprechaun (1993), Body of Evidence (1992), A Nightmare on Elm Street 5: The Dream Child (1989), Cool World (1992), Wild Orchid (1989), Sliver (1993), Chairman of the Board (1997), Red Sonja (1985), Nothing But Trouble (1991), Ishtar (1987), Toys (1992), Weekend at Bernie’s II (1993), Shanghai Surprise (1986), Friday the 13th Part VII: The New Blood (1988), Exit to Eden (1994), Fire Down Below (1997), Color of Night (1994), Graveyard Shift (1990), No Holds Barred (1989), The Lawnmower Man (1992), Arthur 2: On the Rocks (1988), Maximum Overdrive (1986), Fire Birds (1990), Cocoon: The Return (1988), Jingle All the Way (1996), Raw Deal (1986), Crocodile Dundee II (1988), Hudson Hawk (1991), Critters 2: The Main Course (1988), Rambo III (1988), Hot to Trot (1988), Terminal Velocity (1994), Meatballs Part II (1984), Cobra (1986), Ernest Goes to Jail (1990), Hard to Kill (1990), Conan the Destroyer (1984), The Golden Child (1986), Another 48 Hrs. (1990), Hard Rain (1998), Under the Cherry Moon (1986), Mannequin (1987), K-9 (1989), Days of Thunder (1990), Blame It on Rio (1984), No Mercy (1986), Senseless (1998), The Wizard (1989), The Marrying Man (1991), Sleeping with the Enemy (1991), The Cannonball Run (1981), Stone Cold (1991), Tango & Cash (1989), Lock Up (1989), The Good Son (1993), 1492: Conquest of Paradise (1992), Dangerous Minds (1995), Young Guns II (1990), Event Horizon (1997), Dutch (1991), Police Academy (1984), Road House (1989)

Best Options (Comedy): 75.0 Look Who’s Talking Now (1993), 71.9 Teen Wolf Too (1987), 59.6 Suburban Commando (1991), 55.6 Ringmaster (1998), 54.1 Who’s That Girl (1987), 53.2 Made in America (1993), 52.4 Blank Check (1994), 51.5 The Pest (1997), 50.5 Getting Even with Dad (1994), 50.0 Smokey and the Bandit II (1980), 49.9 3 Ninjas (1992), 49.1 My Girl 2 (1994), 48.3 My Stepmother Is an Alien (1988), 47.9 Three Men and a Little Lady (1990), 46.7 House Party 3 (1994), 46.3 Zapped! (1982), 45.7 Sidekicks (1992), 45.4 Excess Baggage (1997), 44.8 Buffy the Vampire Slayer (1992), 44.8 Dunston Checks In (1996), 44.6 Cocoon: The Return (1988), 43.8 Pink Cadillac (1989), … (and many more)

(You’d be surprised at how many options we got. Obviously the keyword figure itself it basically limited to the 90s since that is (mostly) the extent to which I got data. Franchise Guy would be happy though, look at all them bad sequels that were playing on television in the 90s.)

Welcome to Earf (HoE Number 18) – The shortest path through The Movie Database cast lists using only BMT films is: Courteney Cox is No. 3 billed in Cocoon: The Return and No. 3 billed in 3000 Miles to Graceland, which also stars Kurt Russell (No. 1 billed) who is in Tango & Cash (No. 2 billed) which also stars Sylvester Stallone (No. 1 billed) who is in The Expendables 3 (No. 1 billed) which also stars Jason Statham (No. 2 billed) who is in In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale (No. 1 billed) which also stars Leelee Sobieski (No. 3 billed) who is in Here on Earth (No. 1 billed) => (3 + 3) + (1 + 2) + (1 + 1) + (2 + 1) + (3 + 1) = 18. If we were to watch Bedtime Stories we can get the HoE Number down to 16.

Notes – Brian Dennehy is seen at the end of the film, reprising his role as Walter the alien leader. Dennehy agreed to reprise his role from the first film as a favor to his castmates, and accepted no payment for doing so.

Ron Howard refused to have any association with the film, feeling concerned that the whole point of the first film would immediately be squandered.

The entire main cast of Cocoon (1985) returned for this sequel.

Ron Howard passed on directing the film and directed Willow (1988) instead.

This was Jack Gilford’s final film before his death on June 2, 1990 at the age of 81.

Producers Richard D. Zanuck and Lili Fini Zanuck, co-owned the rights to the sequel with 20th Century Fox. Initially opposed to the concept of a second film, they only went ahead with it out of a need to preserve the integrity of the original. As it transpired, Lili, who was very much opposed to doing a sequel, had only nominal interest, as she was busy prepping her own directorial debut, Rush (1991).

The movie David (Barret Oliver) is watching in his room at the beginning of the movie is ‘Breaking Away’ starring Dennis Christopher and Dennis Quaid.

The St. Petersburg Oceanographic Institute facility seen in this film (where the Antarean was kept for observation) is actually the University of Miami’s Rosenstiel School of Marine and Atmospheric Sciences Center located on Virginia Key just outside of Miami.

Just as the first film, the cast includes three Oscar winners: Don Ameche, Jessica Tandy, and Maureen Stapleton; and two Oscar nominees: Hume Cronyn and Jack Gilford.

Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer Preview

Jamie looks down at the GMT Rulez. Rule #7 – Lotsa Twists. He crosses that off so it reads “Just One Well-timed Twist.” He looks back up at the drama unfolding in front of him. “Why don’t you tell him who you really are?” Patrick says, swirling his glass of scotch. Cowgirl Jamie looks between them and shrugs her shoulders, turning to Jamie. “Jeannie DuBois, ace reporter for the Times of Delaware. You have to understand major public interest stories don’t just walk into Delaware every day.” Jamie turns away, the stench of betrayal heavy in the air. “But I really did like you, Jamie. I really did want to watch Here on Earth with you. To understand you.” He stops her with a glance. “I can handle you just loving me for my rock hard abs. I can even understand you liking me because I’m famous… but please, have some respect for me and don’t lie about Here on Earth. I should have known when you said you thought every moment of Here on Earth was sexy that something was off. Is it sexy that Sam’s knee cancer came back at the very moment she found love with Kelley?” Jeannie flinches. “I didn’t think so. So please, just go,” Jamie spits. Patrick is already at the door. He pulls it open to allow Jeannie to leave and is shocked to see people waiting on the porch. “My word, is that Kyle from SexyMannequinTimes.com?!” Jeannie says, her eyes growing large, just before they push her out the door and pull Kyle and Rachel in for hugs. Patrick and Jamie are delighted. “The four of us back together again! Fantastic!” they scream, but there is nothing fantastic about the look on Kyle’s face. That’s right! We are finally sinking our teeth into the original Fantastic Four films. And I mean original. That’s because we aren’t just doing Fantastic Four and Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer from the early 2000’s. They’re also bringing along their friend, the never released Fantastic Four adaptation from 1994. It was just a way to keep the rights to the film and it works… worked so well that we had to get it into BMT. Fantastic. Let’s go!

Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer (2007) – BMeTric: 48.4; Notability: 109

StreetCreditReport.com – BMeTric: top 10.4%; Notability: top 0.0%; Rotten Tomatoes: top 36.7%; Higher BMeT: Epic Movie, In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale, Norbit, I Know Who Killed Me, Bratz, Daddy Day Camp, Who’s Your Caddy?, Are We Done Yet?, Postal, Captivity, The Comebacks, Underdog, The Hills Have Eyes 2, Redline, Ghost Rider, The Seeker: The Dark Is Rising, Alvin and the Chipmunks, Primeval, The Ten, License to Wed, and 6 more; Lower RT: Redline, Remember the Daze, Daddy Day Camp, Epic Movie, Kickin’ It Old Skool, Because I Said So, In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale, 88 Minutes, Good Luck Chuck, Full of It, Who’s Your Caddy?, Silk, License to Wed, The Number 23, The Reaping, Are We Done Yet?, Premonition, Mama’s Boy, Postal, Norbit, and 70 more; Notes: Wo, the number one notability film of 2007! A 100+ Notability is quite rare.

Leonard Maltin – 2 stars – Sequel finds the earth imperiled by a mysterious force that is wreaking havoc with weather systems (and global landmarks), and making the impending N.Y.C. nuptials of Reed (Gruffudd) and Sue (Alba) difficult to plan. The culprit may be the Silver Surfer for possibly the returning Victor Von Doom (McMahon). A special-effectsapalooza masquerading as a feature film. Look for the comic’s cocreator Stan Lee as a party guest.

(Surprisingly up on the film. Given the Movie Guide always had to be terse due to the sheer amount of information it contains, it is somewhat surprising how flippant he is with “and global landmarks.” … is that supposed to mean something significant? I can’t figure out why that turn of phrase is in the review at all.)

Trailer – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wiu5eZ_7vSY/

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wiu5eZ_7vSY/

(That does look way cooler I have to say. The first looks dumb and has dumb music, this at least has normal trailer music and seems like it has a good bad guy.)

Directors – Tim Story – ( Known For: Barbershop; Think Like a Man; The Blackening; Hurricane Season; The Firing Squad; Future BMT: Think Like a Man Too; BMT: Fantastic Four; Tom and Jerry; Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer; Shaft; Taxi; Ride Along; Ride Along 2; Notes: Oh wow, I didn’t know he was doing The Blackening. Actually looks like a fun movie. It is a horror movie starring an all black cast. The poster is pretty funny.)

Writers – Don Payne – ( Known For: Thor; Thor: The Dark World; Future BMT: My Super Ex-Girlfriend; BMT: Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer; Notes: He used to write on The Simpsons (and won four Emmys as part of that crew). Kind of funny how he ended up falling into superhero stuff.)

Mark Frost – ( Known For: The Greatest Game Ever Played; Storyville; Future BMT: The Believers; BMT: Fantastic Four; Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer; Notes: He did indeed write both of them, which is kind of surprising.)

John Turman – ( Known For: Hulk; BMT: Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer; Notes: I now know there was a Crow television series since he apparently wrote an episode of it. It looks awful. Very syndication-y like the Highlander series.)

Stan Lee – ( Known For: Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania; Black Panther: Wakanda Forever; Ant-Man; Ant-Man and the Wasp; Avengers: Endgame; Thor: Love and Thunder; Spider-Man: No Way Home; Black Panther; Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness; Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse; The Avengers; Iron Man; Spider-Man; Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2; Thor: Ragnarok; Spider-Man: Homecoming; Thor; Iron Man Three; Avengers: Age of Ultron; Spider-Man: Far from Home; BMT: Fantastic Four; Fantastic Four; Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer; Notes: Even after his death he was doing cameos in the Marvel films as they knew he wasn’t going to be able to continue due to his health. In the first he’s a mailman, in the second he plays himself.)

Jack Kirby – ( Known For: Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania; Black Panther: Wakanda Forever; Ant-Man; Ant-Man and the Wasp; Avengers: Endgame; Black Panther; Eternals; Avengers: Infinity War; Zack Snyder’s Justice League; Captain Marvel; The Avengers; Iron Man; Captain America: Civil War; Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2; Thor: Ragnarok; Thor; Iron Man Three; Avengers: Age of Ultron; Captain America: The Winter Soldier; The Incredible Hulk; Future BMT: Justice League; BMT: Fantastic Four; Fantastic Four; Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer; Notes: He basically invented the Avengers including Black Panther, Captain America, and Thor.)

Actors – Ioan Gruffudd – ( Known For: Titanic; San Andreas; Black Hawk Down; Horrible Bosses; Ava; The Secret of Moonacre; The Professor and the Madman; W.; Playing It Cool; Wilde; Amazing Grace; The Gathering; Keep Watching; Fireflies in the Garden; Buttons, A New Musical Film; The Adventurer: The Curse of the Midas Box; This Girl’s Life; Forever; Stories USA; Shooters; Future BMT: King Arthur; 102 Dalmatians; BMT: Fantastic Four; Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer; Sanctum; Razzie Notes: Nominee for Worst Screen Couple in 2008 for 4: Rise of the Silver Surfer, Awake, and Good Luck Chuck; Notes: Appeared in the music video for Uptown Girl by the Irish boy band Westlife.)

Jessica Alba – ( Known For: Sin City; Never Been Kissed; Knocked Up; Sin City: A Dame to Kill For; Machete; Barely Lethal; The Killer Inside Me; The Sleeping Dictionary; Stretch; Some Kind of Beautiful; Meet Bill; Killers Anonymous; El Camino Christmas; The Ten; A.C.O.D.; The Veil; Dear Eleanor; P.U.N.K.S.; Paranoid; An Invisible Sign; Future BMT: Into the Blue; Awake; Entourage; Spy Kids 4: All the Time in the World; Machete Kills; Idle Hands; Camp Nowhere; Honey; The Eye; Little Fockers; BMT: Valentine’s Day; Fantastic Four; Good Luck Chuck; Mechanic: Resurrection; Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer; The Love Guru; Escape from Planet Earth; Razzie Notes: Winner for Worst Supporting Actress in 2011 for Little Fockers, Machete, The Killer Inside Me, and Valentine’s Day; Nominee for Worst Actress in 2006 for Fantastic Four, and Into the Blue; in 2008 for 4: Rise of the Silver Surfer, Awake, and Good Luck Chuck; and in 2009 for The Eye, and The Love Guru; and Nominee for Worst Screen Couple in 2008 for 4: Rise of the Silver Surfer, Awake, and Good Luck Chuck; Notes: Met her future husband Cash Warren on the set of Fantastic Four, he was Tim Story’s assitant.)

Chris Evans – ( Known For: Ant-Man; Avengers: Endgame; Knives Out; The Gray Man; Don’t Look Up; Avengers: Infinity War; Scott Pilgrim vs. the World; Captain Marvel; Free Guy; Captain America: The First Avenger; The Avengers; Captain America: Civil War; Spider-Man: Homecoming; Not Another Teen Movie; Avengers: Age of Ultron; Captain America: The Winter Soldier; Snowpiercer; Lightyear; Thor: The Dark World; Gifted; Future BMT: The Nanny Diaries; Street Kings; Push; What’s Your Number?; The Perfect Score; TMNT; BMT: Fantastic Four; Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer; Notes: Often appears with actors like Ben Affleck and John Krasinski when they need a gaggle of people to do bad Boston accents. Especially in things like SNL digital shorts.)

Budget/Gross – $130,000,000 / Domestic: $131,921,738 (Worldwide: $301,913,131)

(See, still not bad. I imagine not pulling in any more money despite spending more was the death knell for the series though. And Chris Evans apparently accepted the Captain America role while they were discussing the possibility of a third movie. I can’t imagine they would do a third without him, he was the best part of the first two by far.)

Rotten Tomatoes – 37% (64/172): While an improvement on its predecessor, Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer is nevertheless a juvenile, simplistic picture that has little benefit beyond its special effects.

(At least it is an improvement. For some reason I always had the impression that the second one was really bad and killed the series. Seems like it is not the case.)

Reviewer Highlight: The performances are plywooden, the cornball visual gags are groanworthy, and Tim Story still can’t direct his way out a sack with a map. – David Fear, Time Out

Poster – Sklogtastic Four: Rise of the Shiny Slider

(Guys. What are we doing here? This is a horrible poster. The first one was boring. This one is also boring but also insane. D- and only because the Silver Surfer is dope.)

Tagline(s) – Rise (What the F)

(Noooooo. Are you trying to kill me? What the fuck, guys? Just the one word… Rise? Dumb. That’s dumb. Have your brains broke?)

Keyword(s) – good

Top 10: Good Will Hunting (1997), The Hunger Games: Catching Fire (2013), Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire (2005), The Great Gatsby (2013), Hot Fuzz (2007), Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb (1964), Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them (2016), The Wizard of Oz (1939), Man on Fire (2004), Kingsman: The Golden Circle (2017)

Future BMT: 67.1 Phat Girlz (2006), 63.2 Hot Tub Time Machine 2 (2015), 60.7 Like a Boss (2020), 51.8 Playing with Fire (2019), 51.6 The Boss (2016), 51.1 Johnny Be Good (1988), 50.7 The Hot Chick (2002), 47.2 Barney’s Great Adventure (1998), 45.1 Fly Me to the Moon 3D (2007), 40.4 No Good Deed (2014), 39.5 Good Burger (1997), 37.2 The Great Wall (2016), 37.1 Stroker Ace (1983), 36.3 Milk Money (1994), 34.7 Mad Money (2008), 34.3 Mo’ Money (1992), 32.1 Good Deeds (2012), 31.3 The Nude Bomb (1980), 28.9 A Good Man in Africa (1994), 25.8 Two for the Money (2005)

BMT: Epic Movie (2007), Fantastic Four (2015), The Ridiculous 6 (2015), Cool as Ice (1991), Cool World (1992), A Good Day to Die Hard (2013), Hot Pursuit (2015), The Fly II (1989), One for the Money (2012), Fire Down Below (1997), Arthur 2: On the Rocks (1988), Air Bud: Golden Receiver (1998), Fire Birds (1990), Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer (2007), Good Luck Chuck (2007), Be Cool (2005), Fantastic Four (2005), Chill Factor (1999), Money Train (1995), Hot to Trot (1988), The Golden Child (1986), Righteous Kill (2008), Sweet Home Alabama (2002), The Wizard (1989), Fresh Horses (1988), Killer Elite (2011), Hunter Killer (2018)

Best Options (superhero): 48.4 Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer (2007), 44.9 Fantastic Four (2005)

(Two more superhero films in the books. I looked it up at one point. I’m not terribly far off from having seen every single superhero film since 1980. It is a little demented.)

Welcome to Earf (HoE Number 10) – The shortest path through The Movie Database cast lists using only BMT films is: Jessica Alba is No. 2 billed in Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer and No. 2 billed in Mechanic: Resurrection, which also stars Jason Statham (No. 1 billed) who is in In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale (No. 1 billed) which also stars Leelee Sobieski (No. 3 billed) who is in Here on Earth (No. 1 billed) => (2 + 2) + (1 + 1) + (3 + 1) = 10. There is no shorter path at the moment.

Notes – Jessica Alba wore a blonde wig because her hair had suffered from all the bleaching in Fantastic Four (2005).

The Silver Surfer was created by Doug Jones wearing a prosthetic suit developed by Spectral Motion, and a new VFX program from Weta Digital which augmented the Surfer’s reflective surface.

Jessica Alba, upon receiving criticism about her performance in this film, said that the director, Tim Story, told her “It looks too real. It looks too painful. Can you be prettier when you cry? Cry pretty, Jessica… Don’t do that thing with your face. Just make it flat. We can CGI the tears in.”

The forest scenes were shot in the same forest as was used in the first three “X-Men” movies.

The studio hated Doctor Doom’s make-up so he remains hidden under a cowl in most of his early scenes.

Originally, Laurence Fishburne was keen to provide the voice for Galactus. He happily switched to the role of the Silver Surfer when it was decided to make Galactus mute.

Plans for a third installment, as well as a Silver Surfer solo film, were discarded after this film flopped at the box office.

Was given a PG rating by the MPAA, the first Marvel film since Howard the Duck (1986) to earn this rating.

The Surfer speaks of “the one I love.” This refers to Shalla-Bal, who (in the comics) was Norrin Radd’s girlfriend before he became the Silver Surfer.

Andre Braugher turned down a supporting role in ER (1994) to take a part in this film.

For this outing, some slight revisions were made to the make-up of The Thing, giving him a larger brow and broader shoulders. This brought the design more in line with the then-recent comic book revision.

Susan worries about having a son with all the public scrutiny. In the comics, Reed and Susan Storm have a son named Franklin Benjamin Richards, who has telepathic powers.

Susan Storm’s wedding dress is a custom made design by the German luxury fashion brand Escada.

In 1980, producer Lee Kramer wanted to make a Silver Surfer rock opera starring his then-girlfriend Dame Olivia Newton-John with music by Sir Paul McCartney.

Awards – Nominee for the Razzie Award for Worst Actress (Jessica Alba, 2008)

Nominee for the Razzie Award for Worst Screen Couple (Jessica Alba, Hayden Christensen, Dane Cook, Ioan Gruffudd, 2008)