Category: Preview

The Exorcist: Believer Preview

The next day, Patrick twirls his fake mustache in a very believable way. “Yes, well I think that room would do just fine.” He tells Jamie, pointing at a map of Fool’s Paradise, the first and only operating B&B in the interdimensional hell they now reside. Jamie is eyeing him suspiciously. “But you haven’t even seen the rooms yet,” Jamie says, confused. “Well, ahem, yes, well, once I see it, I mean… I’m sure it’ll be quite indubitably satisfactory,” Patrick says, using his substantial improv skillz to save the plan. All he needs to do is show Jamie the book. “Chapter 1: Escaping the Maze” makes it very clear exactly how they can get back to the real world. Jamie narrows his eyes and nods his head back towards the inventory closet. “Are you sure you don’t want this room?” he asks in a hushed tone. At that he grabs Patrick by the arms and pulls him into the closet. He flips on the light and rips the mustache from Patrick’s face. “My mustache! You must be a magician to have pulled a real mustache clean off like that!” Patrick exclaims, nailing the improv once again. Jamie grabs the book from Patrick knapsack and holds it up to the light. “I know when I found it that you must have the other piece of the puzzle,” he says, a note of sadness in his voice. He opens the book to the final page of Chapter 1 and places it in its proper place. Patrick looks back at what the book is saying: “To get out of the maze you must recite these words:” That’s where it had ended. Patrick assumed they could just kind of wing it, but now the words are clear: “The Prayer of Reverse Exorcism.” That’s right! We are doing our own reverse exorcism this week. In that we are watching The Exorcist: Believer and it’s the reverse of being good. A-yo. Let’s go! 

The Exorcist: Believer (2023) – BMeTric: 67.0; Notability: 25

StreetCreditReport.com – BMeTric: top 0.4%; Notability: top 6.4%; Rotten Tomatoes: top 6.5%; Higher Notability: Rebel Moon: Part One – A Child of Fire, Fool’s Paradise, Ghosted, Aquaman and the Lost Kingdom, Expend4bles, House Party, Haunted Mansion, Heart of Stone, The Out-Laws, Meg 2: The Trench, Old Dads, My Big Fat Greek Wedding 3, 65, Your Place or Mine, White Men Can’t Jump, Vacation Friends 2; Lower RT: Freelance, The Ritual Killer, 57 Seconds, Expend4bles, In the Fire, On a Wing and a Prayer, Fool’s Paradise, The Tutor, Vacation Friends 2, Robots, The Re-Education of Molly Singer, The Out-Laws, Knights of the Zodiac, Mafia Mamma; Notes: The finale for the year. Not a bad crop, but still, we’ll probably have to think through something eventually. It just isn’t pleasurable or sustainable to get 30 films a year and be scrambling around trying desperately to fill out a good slate.

RogerEbert.com – 2.5 stars – Friedkin excelled on both fronts: the drama and the whammies. The original is still effective because it takes its sweet time establishing characters who seem like real people, then puts them and the audience through a prolonged, brutal ordeal together—one that, at the time, no one had ever seen on a screen before. Clocking in at a relatively breezy 121 minutes in length, “The Exorcist: Believer” is a rare case where a long cut would play better than a short one. Given that the hero and his late wife were photographers, you’d expect photography to play into this film the way sound recording did in the first one, but either the script isn’t interested or just part of the movie got cut down to almost nothing. And there are a lot of underdeveloped themes and elements, including the notion that a culturally divided America needs to come together for the sake of the children, as well as oddly off-brand positive exhortations that everything happens as it should, even trauma, and there would be less evil in the world if we were more emotionally connected to one another. The message at the end isn’t, “The real exorcist is love,” but it almost seems that way.

(Oh boy. Yeah, that jives with a few other reviews I listened to / read. Mainly that it is a little unbelievable that (knowing the filmmakers) the idea is that aw shucks can’t we all just get along … but the movie seems maybe to lean that way unintentionally. Personally I don’t think that is the real message, but I’ll get to that in the recap.)

Trailer – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r71FmJBoSDs/

(I thought the trailer was quite effective and was genuinely pretty surprised when it didn’t hit at least a little bit. I guess I shouldn’t be surprised (horror fans are so persnickety about their favorite franchises, and this is kind of maybe the best of the best in that regard), but I still was.)

Directors – David Gordon Green – ( Known For: Pineapple Express; Halloween; Halloween Ends; Joe; Stronger; Prince Avalanche; Snow Angels; All the Real Girls; Undertow; George Washington; Manglehorn; Future BMT: Your Highness; Halloween Kills; The Sitter; Our Brand Is Crisis; BMT: The Exorcist: Believer; Notes: I’m not sure where he goes from here with his direction. One would hope he’d find something that maybe he could put his stamp on, but it really seems like his last few not hitting could become a problem.)

Writers – Peter Sattler – ( Known For: Camp X-Ray; BMT: The Exorcist: Believer; Notes: Kind of a weird filmography. Camp X-Ray is from 2014, and then this is the only other thing really and he directed Camp X-Ray as well.)

David Gordon Green – ( Known For: Halloween; Halloween Ends; Prince Avalanche; Snow Angels; All the Real Girls; Undertow; George Washington; Goat; Future BMT: Halloween Kills; BMT: The Exorcist: Believer; Notes: Grew up in Arkansas, but went to college in North Carolina where he met McBride. A lot of the comedians of a specific era came from North Carolina for some reason.)

Scott Teems – ( Known For: The Quarry; That Evening Sun;; Future BMT: Halloween Kills; Insidious: The Red Door; BMT: The Exorcist: Believer; Firestarter; Notes: Oooof Firestarter. Seems like a Horror punch up guy, which maybe points to one of my theories on the recent Halloween films and this: the studios are maybe noting and overwriting these things and being too careful. But I guess we’ll see if the second Exorcist ever happens and if the series can recover.)

Danny McBride – ( Known For: Halloween; Halloween Ends; The Foot Fist Way; The Legacy of a Whitetail Deer Hunter; Future BMT: Your Highness; Halloween Kills; BMT: The Exorcist: Believer; Notes: I find it so weird that he is now one of the faces of modern horror. Just given that he is also a face of modern high-concept comedy as well.)

Actors – Leslie Odom Jr. – ( Known For: Glass Onion; Murder on the Orient Express; Hamilton; The Many Saints of Newark; Red Tails; One Night in Miami…; Harriet; Music; Only; Needle in a Timestack; BMT: The Exorcist: Believer; Notes: Nominated for 2 Oscars, and seems to have been in the original cast of Hamilton as Aaron Burr. Both Oscars were for One Night in Miami… for which he wrote an original song.)

Lidya Jewett – (Known For: Hidden Figures; Wonder; Vivo; Feel the Beat; Nightbooks; BMT: The Exorcist: Believer; The Darkest Minds; Notes: Has been in a trilogy of films called Ivy + Bean.)

Olivia O’Neill – (BMT: The Exorcist: Believer; Notes: Legit this is the only thing she’s really been in, but since the IMDb has the cast list all messed up I figured I would throw her in here since the two possessed girls seemed like important characters.)

Budget/Gross – $30 million / Domestic: $65,537,395 (Worldwide: $136,169,912)

(That is really good … The budget was only $30 million? That’s incredible. They are definitely making the next film. I’m honestly surprised there are even rumors the director is going to step away given what a miracle that budget seems to be.)

Rotten Tomatoes – 22% (55/248): The Exorcist: Believer earns points for trying to take the franchise back to its terrifying roots, but a lack of new ideas — and scares — make this an inauspicious start to a planned new trilogy.

(Hmmmmmm, yeah you would think the beginning of a trilogy is the easy bit. It is the middle and (mostly) sticking the landing in the third that is the problem. Bodes poorly.)

Reviewer Highlight: [Green’s former] patience and sensitivity has now been sacrificed to the cannibalism of recycled ideas; and while I don’t begrudge him his success, I do miss the filmmaker he used to be. – Jeannette Catsoulis, New York Times

Poster – The Exorcist: Belieber

(F. That is awful. Why is it sideways? Why does it appear to be a hastily cropped image from the film? Why is everything else about it boring?)

Tagline(s) – Body and the Blood. (D+)

(So just the thing they say in the trailer? It’s got a little flow to it (thus why it is in the movie) but otherwise I’m not sure what it’s up to. Can’t tell if I’m being a little harsh and it should be a C- or if it’s just bad.)

Keyword(s) – Year 2023

Top 10: Oppenheimer (2023), Barbie (2023), Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 (2023), Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse (2023), John Wick: Chapter 4 (2023), Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania (2023), The Super Mario Bros. Movie (2023), Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves (2023), Mission: Impossible – Dead Reckoning Part One (2023), The Flash (2023)

Future BMT: 84.6 Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey (2023), 48.0 Insidious: The Red Door (2023), 43.8 Fool’s Paradise (2023), 43.5 House Party (2023), 37.2 Paint (2023), 35.8 Freelance (2023), 31.6 The Machine (2023), 27.7 Love Again (2023), 24.9 Aquaman and the Lost Kingdom (2023), 20.9 The Marsh King’s Daughter (2023), 18.4 Nefarious (2023), 9.1 The Shift (2023), 9.1 Camp Hideout (2023), 8.8 Back on the Strip (2023), 8.3 Sweetwater (2023)

BMT: The Exorcist: Believer (2023), Meg 2: The Trench (2023), Expend4bles (2023), 65 (2023), Five Nights at Freddy’s (2023), Retribution (2023), Hypnotic (2023), My Big Fat Greek Wedding 3 (2023), Mafia Mamma (2023), About My Father (2023), Haunted Mansion (2023), Fear (2023)

Best Options (2015-2023): 84.6 Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey (2023), 67.0 The Exorcist: Believer (2023), 48.0 Insidious: The Red Door (2023), 43.8 Fool’s Paradise (2023), 43.5 House Party (2023), 35.8 Freelance (2023), 31.6 The Machine (2023), 27.7 Love Again (2023), 24.9 Aquaman and the Lost Kingdom (2023), 20.9 The Marsh King’s Daughter (2023), 9.1 The Shift (2023), 9.1 Camp Hideout (2023), 8.8 Back on the Strip (2023), 8.3 Sweetwater (2023)

(There was no way we were doing Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey. As a matter of fact. That might be the last film we ever do for BMT as they pry it from our cold dead fingers.)

Welcome to Earf (HoE Number 19) – The shortest path through The Movie Database cast lists using only BMT films is: Ellen Burstyn is No. 10 billed in The Exorcist: Believer and No. 2 billed in The Wicker Man, which also stars Leelee Sobieski (No. 6 billed) who is in Here on Earth (No. 1 billed) => (10 + 2) + (6 + 1) = 19. There is no shorter path at the moment.

Notes – On William Friedkin’s passing, writer and film critic Ed Whitfield posted this on Twitter(X) and Facebook : “William Friedkin once said to me, ‘Ed, the guy who made those new Halloween sequels is about to make one to my movie, The Exorcist (1973). That’s right, my signature film is about to be extended by the man who made Pineapple Express (2008). I don’t want to be around when that happens. But if there’s a spirit world, and I can come back, I plan to possess David Gordon Green and make his life a living hell.'” Friedkin actually died two months before the movie was released.

Ellen Burstyn had turned down reprising her role and was then offered double the salary. Burstyn thought, “I feel like the devil is asking my price.” She eventually accepted, using the salary to fund an MFA scholarship for actors at Pace University where the Actors Studio teaches the program. Burstyn is a lifelong member of the Actors Studio and a co-president.

Ellen Burstyn stated in an interview shortly before filming began that she accepted the offer to return solely for the money, which she donated to her charity.

Linda Blair, Regan in the original 1973 film, was an advisor on set to the actresses portraying the possessed girls in this film.

At the beginning of the movie, a small sculpted creature can be seen in Angela’s room. This is the same creature Regan drew with wings in the first movie (1973).

Fool’s Paradise Preview

Several weeks later, Patrick is camped out at Freddy’s. His binoculars (or ‘nocks, as the kids call them) have been trained on Jamie’s new, very haunted house ever since he abandoned him to the maze. “Jesus, that house is so haunted,” Patrick mumbles. It’s true, but there is a twinge of jealousy to Patrick’s disapproving tone because the only ghosts he’s seen are totally dope. Ghost skateboards, ghost Mountain Dew, and ghost electric guitars as far as the eye can see. “And none of this is even real!” Patrick yells, “We are in a puzzle box after probably being hypnotized!” This outburst earns him a shush from Freddy. “Shut it, Freddy,” Patrick growls, “This whole world is pain and/or pleasure and yet none of it can wake us up. That’s dumb.” He feels a hand on his shoulder and Freddy is there with a piping hot za. It’s The Pinhead, his favorite. “Aw, I’m sorry, Fred. Thanks. This will really tear up my throat,” Patrick says and this moment of kindness from Freddy brings a tear to his eye. He’s never noticed how cozy it is at Freddy’s. He’s been so focused on getting out of here that he forgot to appreciate what he has. Friendship, the torture machine in the corner that always eats your quarters, the jukebox that never stops playing Summer Girls by LFO, the large book called How to Escape the Maze, the… “What thuuu…” Patrick says dumbly as he picks up the book. Suddenly escape is within reach. He just has to figure out how to get into Jamie’s house and convince him to leave with him. As he raises the ‘nocks back to his face he smiles as he sees Jamie put a sign on his door, “Fool’s Paradise. Rooms Available.” Bingo. That’s right! We’re watching Fool’s Paradise… … … Fooooool’s Paradise. Because we have to for the chain. Let’s go! 

Fool’s Paradise (2023) – BMeTric: 43.8; Notability: 54

StreetCreditReport.com – BMeTric: top 7.2%; Notability: top 0.0%; Rotten Tomatoes: top 2.8%; Higher BMeT: The Exorcist: Believer, Meg 2: The Trench, Expend4bles, The Black Demon, Knights of the Zodiac, Best. Christmas. Ever!, Pet Sematary: Bloodlines, 65, The Ritual Killer, Five Nights at Freddy’s, The Out-Laws, Insidious: The Red Door, Maybe I Do, In the Fire, White Men Can’t Jump, Retribution, Hypnotic, Fool’s Paradise; Lower RT: Freelance, The Ritual Killer, 57 Seconds, Expend4bles, In the Fire, On a Wing and a Prayer; Notes: The fact that this tops the notability scale is crazy! It might seem like 54 is low, but all the numbers creep up over time as people get more notable, so there will be some higher ones eventually I think. Then again, the cast here is just so expansive.

RogerEbert.com – 0.5 stars – Hollywood will always be ripe for skewering. It employs too many comedians and takes itself too seriously as a business not to be. Because this topic is so close to home, it means many others have had a few laughs at the industry’s expense already, including Woody Allen mocking their (still growing) number of award shows in “Annie Hall” or even how the Marion Davies comedy “Show People” had fun with the odds characters you meet in entertainment in the 1920s. But “Fool’s Paradise” occupies some mirthless middle ground between “Show People” and the dark Hollywood satire “The Day of the Locust,” and it doesn’t have anything to show for it. Overblown caricatures and stale jokes about “don’t you know who I am?!” and going to see his wife’s shaman are as empty as a finished cup of coffee, and unfortunately, this movie has nothing else to offer for a refill.

(Wow, this is an extremely rare thumbs down from the Roger Ebert site. One star isn’t that crazy, but I can’t remember the last time we saw a real thumbs down. So … that’s exciting.)

Trailer – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3j6b_hevaoY/

(It is a really weird idea … and after watching the film I still don’t really know what it is about. I thought it was about like … a Chaplin-esque guy, but that isn’t at all what the trailer seems to be. It seems more like a weirdo who looks like an actor ends up becoming one while not saying any lines? That might be it I suppose.)

Directors – Charlie Day – ( BMT: Fool’s Paradise; Notes: Legit the only thing he’s directed which is crazy. I would have thought he would have done a few It’s Always Sunny episodes at least before making a giant film with a thousand famous actors.)

Writers – Charlie Day – ( BMT: Fool’s Paradise; Notes: He grew up in Rhode Island and both his parents are musicians which maybe explains why his character on It’s Always Sunny is an amazing musician.)

Actors – Charlie Day – ( Known For: Pacific Rim; Horrible Bosses; Monsters University; The Lego Movie; The Super Mario Bros. Movie; Pacific Rim: Uprising; The Lego Movie 2: The Second Part; Going the Distance; Hotel Artemis; I Want You Back; The Hollars; I Love You, Daddy; How It Ends; A Quiet Little Marriage; Future BMT: Horrible Bosses 2; Vacation; Fist Fight; BMT: Fool’s Paradise; Notes: Majored in Art History and it is indicated he was mostly acting in bit parts and waiting tables when he pitched It’s Always Sunny with his costars.)

Ken Jeong – ( Known For: Avengers: Endgame; The Hangover; Despicable Me; Despicable Me 2; Knocked Up; Pineapple Express; Step Brothers; Role Models; Pain & Gain; Crazy Rich Asians; Turbo; The DUFF; Penguins of Madagascar; The Muppets; Boss Level; My Spy; Scoob!; Over the Moon; Lady and the Tramp; Goosebumps 2: Haunted Halloween; Future BMT: The Hangover Part II; Transformers: Dark of the Moon; The Hangover Part III; Couples Retreat; Vampires Suck; The Goods: Live Hard, Sell Hard; Wonder Park; Norm of the North; BMT: Zookeeper; Ride Along 2; All About Steve; Tom & Jerry; Big Mommas: Like Father, Like Son; Furry Vengeance; Fool’s Paradise; Notes: Famously a doctor who used to do comedy on the side and then once he got his big break (in Knocked Up maybe?) he quit being a doctor and started acting full time. Probably most notable for Community at this point.)

Kate Beckinsale – ( Known For: The Aviator; Contraband; Serendipity; Vacancy; Everybody’s Fine; Stonehearst Asylum; Much Ado About Nothing; Absolutely Anything; Nothing But the Truth; Jolt; Love & Friendship; Laurel Canyon; The Only Living Boy in New York; The Last Days of Disco; Snow Angels; Shooting Fish; Winged Creatures; Haunted; The Trials of Cate McCall; The Face of an Angel; Future BMT: Click; Underworld; Van Helsing; Total Recall; Underworld: Evolution; Underworld: Rise of the Lycans; Underworld: Awakening; Underworld: Blood Wars; Brokedown Palace; The Disappointments Room; BMT: Pearl Harbor; Whiteout; Tiptoes; Fool’s Paradise; Notes: British and both of her parents were British actors as well. Her father in particular was a television actor of some note who died at the very early age of 31. But he was, for example, in 17 episodes of Porridge which is quite a significant British comedy series of the 70s.)

Budget/Gross – N/A / Domestic: $855,173 (Worldwide: $881,743)

(Obviously catastrophic, but it was shelved for years and seems to have been pushed out in limited release just to get a little money and possibly for contractual reasons. I can’t think of another reason honestly.)

Rotten Tomatoes – 18% (8/45): Fool’s Paradise suggests Charlie Day may have a bright future as a director, but he’ll need to find smarter and more consistently funny scripts.

(Ah interesting. Well … he wrote it alone it would seem. But that is still interesting. I do hope he tries again, I think he is quite the talent and getting an interesting (musical?) film out of him would be fun.)

Reviewer Highlight: You’d need to be Blake Edwards to pull this off. One wishes Day had looked further afield than Hollywood for inspiration. – Nicolas Rapold, New York Times

Poster – Foooooool’s Paradise

(Seems like this is a take on a poster that I don’t get… or maybe it’s just whatever. Not sure. I like the yellow and red, though. Font is slightly better than bad. Overall, C. Some good, some bad.)

Tagline(s) – He’s ready for his close-up. (D)

(Huh. Well that’s not funny. I guess they are playing on the poster… his face it super close-up and he seems a bit scared? Don’t like it.)

Keyword(s) – Year 2023

Top 10: Oppenheimer (2023), Barbie (2023), Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 (2023), Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse (2023), John Wick: Chapter 4 (2023), Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania (2023), The Super Mario Bros. Movie (2023), Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves (2023), Mission: Impossible – Dead Reckoning Part One (2023), The Flash (2023)

Future BMT: 84.6 Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey (2023), 67.0 The Exorcist: Believer (2023), 48.0 Insidious: The Red Door (2023), 43.5 House Party (2023), 37.2 Paint (2023), 35.8 Freelance (2023), 31.6 The Machine (2023), 27.7 Love Again (2023), 24.9 Aquaman and the Lost Kingdom (2023), 20.9 The Marsh King’s Daughter (2023), 18.4 Nefarious (2023), 9.1 The Shift (2023), 9.1 Camp Hideout (2023), 8.8 Back on the Strip (2023), 8.3 Sweetwater (2023)

BMT: Meg 2: The Trench (2023), Expend4bles (2023), 65 (2023), Five Nights at Freddy’s (2023), Retribution (2023), Hypnotic (2023), Fool’s Paradise (2023), My Big Fat Greek Wedding 3 (2023), Mafia Mamma (2023), About My Father (2023), Haunted Mansion (2023), Fear (2023)

Best Options (Angels In the Outfield): 43.8 Fool’s Paradise (2023), 9.1 The Shift (2023), 9.1 Camp Hideout (2023)

(Yeah and this was really the only option sadly, those other ones are even less of movies than this one! Also you’d think with the expansive cast you’d get some awesome options coming off of it, but nope. We have a pretty solid idea for it, but still, not as good of a chain as you’d expect.)

Welcome to Earf (HoE Number 11) – The shortest path through The Movie Database cast lists using only BMT films is: Kate Beckinsale is No. 3 billed in Fool’s Paradise and No. 2 billed in Pearl Harbor, which also stars Josh Hartnett (No. 3 billed) who is in Here on Earth (No. 3 billed) => (3 + 2) + (3 + 3) = 11. There is no shorter path at the moment.

Notes – Filmed in 2018, this is one of Ray Liotta’s last films, before his death in 2022.

Charlie Day and Mary Elizabeth Ellis are married in real life, they also star together on It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia.

Of the main cast of It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005) only Glenn Howerton appears. However multiple guest stars & recurring actors from the show appear in this film: Jason Sudeikis, Mary Elizabeth Ellis, Artemis Pebdani, Leonora Pitts, Jimmi Simpson, Lance Barber, Andrew Leeds, Julia Cho, Alanna Ubach, David Hornsby, Lisa Schwartz, Peter Mackenzie, Christine Horn & Christopher Macken.

Charlie Day’s character is named Latte Pronto. In ‘It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia’, in Season 1 Episode 1 around 12:30, Charlie Day is seated at a restaurant and there is a sign with ‘Pronto’ written on it in the background.

Haunted Mansion (2023) Preview

Five days later, Patrick wakes up at Freddy’s Resort, Spa and Pizzeria. It’s actually been a fairly routine four days. Relaxing by the maze, sightseeing in the maze, and all the za you can eat. Each night Patrick expects to awake to whatever nightmare Freddy’s has to offer, but so far no scares to be found. “I’m telling you, Freddy’s isn’t scary,” Jamie insists when he sees the look of concern return to Patrick’s face as night falls. “The only thing scary is how dope this za is,” he says before scarfing down another slice of The Hellraiser. While he wouldn’t normally like a pizza who’s only topping is five pounds of ghost peppers, Patrick has to admit that it’s oddly pleasurable to consume. “Yeah, I’m sorry man. I’ve just been on edge ever since we’ve ended up in this puzzle box to an interdimensional hell,” Patrick admits. “I think I lost sight of what’s important, and that is that you found love with Demon #1 and Demon #2.” He slaps Jamie on the back, who winces in pain. Four night of pleasure (or is it pain?) has left his back shredded like Shredder from the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Jamie smiles, but then his face turns serious. Patrick is suddenly afraid that the other shoe is finally going to drop. “Patrick,” Jamie says, “I have to tell you something.” Patrick holds his breath. “We just… we love it so much here. Freddy’s is a dream and really, what do we have to go back to in the maze?” Jamie’s eyes are filling with tears. “We’re… we’re moving here. We’re… moving there. And I need to do it on my own,” Jamie is pointing at what is clearly a very haunted house. “Say what?” Patrick asks incredulously. That’s right! We are indeed watching a very haunted movie in Haunted Mansion. No, not the Eddie Murphy one (we’ll pick that up at some point), but the new one. You know, the one that would have gone straight to Disney+ a year ago. We are pairing that with Ghosted, a blockbuster Chris Evans/Ana de Armas vehicle that went straight to Apple+ (in this economy?). It was the biggest, baddest streamer we could find. Let’s go!

Haunted Mansion (2023) – BMeTric: 28.2; Notability: 34

StreetCreditReport.com – BMeTric: top 15.6%; Notability: top 2.4%; Rotten Tomatoes: top 22.4%; Higher BMeT: The Exorcist: Believer, Meg 2: The Trench, Expend4bles, The Black Demon, Knights of the Zodiac, Best. Christmas. Ever!, Pet Sematary: Bloodlines, 65, The Ritual Killer, Five Nights at Freddy’s, The Out-Laws, Insidious: The Red Door, Maybe I Do, In the Fire, White Men Can’t Jump, Retribution, Hypnotic, Fool’s Paradise, House Party, Locked In, and 19 more; Higher Notability: Rebel Moon: Part One – A Child of Fire, Fool’s Paradise, Ghosted, Aquaman and the Lost Kingdom, Expend4bles, House Party; Lower RT: Freelance, The Ritual Killer, 57 Seconds, Expend4bles, In the Fire, On a Wing and a Prayer, Fool’s Paradise, The Tutor, Vacation Friends 2, Robots, The Re-Education of Molly Singer, The Out-Laws, Knights of the Zodiac, Mafia Mamma, The Exorcist: Believer, Pet Sematary: Bloodlines, Pain Hustlers, The Family Plan, God Is a Bullet, Rebel Moon: Part One – A Child of Fire, and 28 more; Notes: This year has been a bit odd still. I do hope things return a bit more to normal in 2024 as far as the cinema goes, but with the writer’s strike I fear we are in for another weirdo year of stuff getting pushed around and jockeying for space.

RogerEbert.com – 2.0 stars – “Haunted Mansion” is constructed with the familiar bricks of a Gothic tale, down to the theme of grief that runs throughout. There’s a thoughtful examination of how grief makes us vulnerable while also being able to harness the power of that love to connect with one another and appreciate the lives we lead. There’s also value for family audiences in the nostalgic spookiness that rides along the surface. But with a repeated sourness in the film’s comedic efforts and a tragically misused ensemble, “Haunted Mansion” misses the chance to become a Halloween classic.

(This is a better review than I expected. Spoiler: I mostly agree. The film is more entertaining than it has any right to be, but it also is a lot worse than it needed to be. Some fatal misteps which were entirely avoidable.)

Trailer – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iB_1o3c19y0/

(Wait … that’s Jared Leto? How weird. The film looks very interesting actually, but (spoiler) … yeah they show most of the good parts. The problem with the film is it takes ages before you actually see any ghosts which is pretty unfortunate. The ghosts are the most fun part!)

Directors – Justin Simien – ( Known For: Dear White People; Bad Hair; BMT: Haunted Mansion; Notes: I’ve heard the series Dear White People is pretty good. He seems really young, although his age isn’t on his IMDb.)

Writers – Katie Dippold – ( Known For: Ghostbusters; The Heat; Future BMT: Snatched; BMT: Haunted Mansion; Notes: Wrote 31 episodes of Parks and Rec. Kind of weird she has a solo credit here all things considered. I would think Disney would want to get a few more cooks in there.)

Actors – LaKeith Stanfield – ( Known For: Knives Out; Get Out; Uncut Gems; Straight Outta Compton; Snowden; The Purge: Anarchy; Selma; Short Term 12; Death Note; Judas and the Black Messiah; Dope; Sorry to Bother You; The Harder They Fall; War Machine; Someone Great; Miles Ahead; The Incredible Jessica James; The Photograph; Crown Heights; Come Sunday; Future BMT: The Girl in the Spider’s Web; BMT: Haunted Mansion; Notes: I forgot his was nominated for an Oscar for Judas and the Black Messiah. Played a major role on Atlanta as well.)

Rosario Dawson – ( Known For: Sin City; Death Proof; Unstoppable; Percy Jackson & the Olympians: The Lightning Thief; Zombieland: Double Tap; Grindhouse; 25th Hour; Sin City: A Dame to Kill For; The Lego Batman Movie; Clerks II; Trance; The Rundown; Sorry to Bother You; Kids; Rent; He Got Game; Shattered Glass; The Captive; Jay and Silent Bob Reboot; Top Five; Future BMT: Seven Pounds; Eagle Eye; Alexander; Unforgettable; Ratchet & Clank; Light It Up; BMT: Men in Black II; Space Jam: A New Legacy; Zookeeper; Haunted Mansion; The Adventures of Pluto Nash; Down to You; Notes: A crazy year for her, ended up in Ashoka as well. All over that Disney brand. She was a rare addition to the Rent film adaptation since the original castmember was pregnant and couldn’t do the role.)

Owen Wilson – ( Known For: The Grand Budapest Hotel; Cars; Midnight in Paris; Wedding Crashers; Night at the Museum; Meet the Parents; The Royal Tenenbaums; Zoolander; Fantastic Mr. Fox; Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania; The Darjeeling Limited; Night at the Museum: Battle of the Smithsonian; The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou; The Cable Guy; Wonder; Marley & Me; Starsky & Hutch; The French Dispatch; Shanghai Noon; Night at the Museum: Secret of the Tomb; Future BMT: Meet the Fockers; The Internship; Cars 2; Hall Pass; Little Fockers; You, Me and Dupree; Drillbit Taylor; Masterminds; How Do You Know; Free Birds; Paint; BMT: Armageddon; Behind Enemy Lines; Anaconda; Around the World in 80 Days; The Haunting; Zoolander 2; I Spy; Haunted Mansion; Father Figures; Marmaduke; Notes: Nominated for an Oscar for playing Lightning McQueen in Cars. Joking, he was nominated for writing The Royal Tenenbaums with his long time collaborator Wes Anderson. They met in college in Texas.)

Budget/Gross – $150 million / Domestic: $67,653,287 (Worldwide: $117,449,790)

(Yeah that is quite bad, but the whole streaming thing muddles all this stuff. But it seems doubtful this necessarily moved the needle for Disney in any way. Also weird that they released two different Haunted Mansion films pretty close together.)

Rotten Tomatoes – 37% (94/253): Haunted Mansion’s talented cast makes the movie a pleasant enough destination, although it’s neither scary nor funny enough to wholeheartedly recommend.

(I don’t think it would ever be scary. But yes, I would have imagined it should have been funny. It should have had like … a ghost sidekick or something.)

Reviewer Highlight: There is a mansion, it is haunted, boo, blah, the end. – Manohla Dargis, New York Times

Poster – A Haunting in Orlando

(I’m not sure the cast warrants this poster. You would think the mansion is the star and yet it’s just a little itty bitty thing in the crystal ball. Mistake. Nice font and colors, though. B-.)

Tagline(s) – Home is where the haunt is. (A+++)

(Noooooooo. I appreciate the effort though. I have to make that very clear. I would take a terrible, horrific pun 100 out of 100 times over some generic bullshit. So obviously this gets an A+++)

Keyword(s) – Year 2023

Top 10: Oppenheimer (2023), Barbie (2023), Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 (2023), Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse (2023), John Wick: Chapter 4 (2023), Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania (2023), The Super Mario Bros. Movie (2023), Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves (2023), Mission: Impossible – Dead Reckoning Part One (2023), The Flash (2023)

Future BMT: 84.6 Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey (2023), 67.0 The Exorcist: Believer (2023), 48.0 Insidious: The Red Door (2023), 43.8 Fool’s Paradise (2023), 43.5 House Party (2023), 37.2 Paint (2023), 35.8 Freelance (2023), 31.6 The Machine (2023), 27.7 Love Again (2023), 24.9 Aquaman and the Lost Kingdom (2023), 20.9 The Marsh King’s Daughter (2023), 18.4 Nefarious (2023), 9.1 The Shift (2023), 9.1 Camp Hideout (2023), 8.8 Back on the Strip (2023), 8.3 Sweetwater (2023)

BMT: Meg 2: The Trench (2023), Expend4bles (2023), 65 (2023), Five Nights at Freddy’s (2023), Retribution (2023), Hypnotic (2023), My Big Fat Greek Wedding 3 (2023), Mafia Mamma (2023), About My Father (2023), Haunted Mansion (2023), Fear (2023)

Best Options (imdb-keyword-haunted-house): 28.1 Haunted Mansion (2023)

(I genuinely thought maybe there would be some odd Haunted House one there, but naw, this was the only one. Whatever,)

Welcome to Earf (HoE Number 15) – The shortest path through The Movie Database cast lists using only BMT films is: Rosario Dawson is No. 1 billed in Haunted Mansion and No. 2 billed in Zookeeper, which also stars Kevin James (No. 1 billed) who is in Pixels (No. 2 billed) which also stars Adam Sandler (No. 1 billed) who is in Jack and Jill (No. 1 billed) which also stars Al Pacino (No. 2 billed) who is in 88 Minutes (No. 1 billed) which also stars Leelee Sobieski (No. 3 billed) who is in Here on Earth (No. 1 billed) => (1 + 2) + (1 + 2) + (1 + 1) + (2 + 1) + (3 + 1) = 15. If we were to watch Like a Boss we can get the HoE Number down to 14.

Notes – Gracey Manor is modeled after the original Disneyland Haunted Mansion. Crump Manor is modeled after Magic Kingdom’s Haunted Mansion at Walt Disney World.

The namesake of “William Gracey” and the “Gracey Manor” (the Haunted Mansion’s mansion name), stems from Yale Gracey, a Disney Imagineer and member of the Academy of Magical Arts (their clubhouse is The Magic Castle in Hollywood, CA). Yale was the one who created a modernized version of “Pepper’s Ghost Illusion.” He showed a model to Walt Disney, who loved it and honored Yale by calling the mansion “The Gracey Mansion.” Today, the attraction still holds the largest display of Pepper’s Ghost Illusion in the world (it is the dining room scene with the ghosts flying around the table). The original, working, model is still on display at The Magic Castle in Hollywood, California.

The chair in which Harriet is seated at the spirit session, and in which she is later expelled from the Mansion, resembles the ride vehicles, known as “Doombuggies”, in the Haunted Mansion ride in the Disney parks.

Eddie Murphy, star of The Haunted Mansion (2003), was invited back to make a cameo appearance but was turned down when he demanded $500,000 for one days work.

Vic, the cohost at Crump Manor, can be briefly heard to play the theme to another Disney attraction, “it’s a Small World,” on the piano.

Five Nights at Freddy’s Preview

Patrick crashes through the swinging doors of the kitchen only to find himself back in the fancy restaurant, now even fancier as it is the site of Jamie’s wedding. “The great thing about this wedding is that it’s not just one wedding. Because I couldn’t choose just one bride. Isn’t that great!” Jamie says to the amusement of his guests. He sees Patrick and comes scurrying over. “Where have you been?” For a moment Jamie appears angry but then his face softens. “I’m really nervous,” he admits. Patrick looks around at the guests and finds that he’s also nervous. They are horrific creatures of darkness that only know suffering and pain (or is it pleasure?). “Hey can we talk about this?” Patrick says quietly, but Jamie isn’t listening. “Sure, sure, but first I got two weddings to get to. Three if you count your vow renewal ceremony. Your wife is coming, right?” Patrick stares back at him blankly. “Perfect. Just perfect,” Jamie glowers, “well more wedding for me.” With that he hops up on stage and snaps at the demon priestess to get the show on the road. Rusty hooks fly out from the walls and stab into Jamie’s flash. The priestess places what looks like a tiny bear trap on Jamie’s finger and he stammers out how much he loves Nerdy Demon and a weak, “This sure is nice. I’m getting so much pleasure from this.” Tears stream down his face as he turns to Sultry Demon and can only whimper, “Jesus wept.” The demon brides, delighted, tear at Jamie with their claws to complete the ceremony. Jamie turns painfully to Patrick and holds up some tickets. “And as a final present I want you and yours to join us on the honeymoon. A relaxing five nights at….” That’s right! Five Nights at Freddy’s! You’re probably all like “But wait, I know your cycle inside and out and how in the world is Five Nights at Freddy’s in the Achievement slot? The answer is ‘why not?’ We already completed the year. That’s the achievement. So let us do one of the biggest critical flops of the year that doubles as one of the biggest surprise hits of the year. Let’s go!

Five Nights at Freddy’s (2023) – BMeTric: 50.1; Notability: 17

StreetCreditReport.com – BMeTric: top 3.6%; Notability: top 12.0%; Rotten Tomatoes: top 16.8%; Higher BMeT: The Exorcist: Believer, Meg 2: The Trench, Expend4bles, The Black Demon, Knights of the Zodiac, Best. Christmas. Ever!, Pet Sematary: Bloodlines, 65, The Ritual Killer; Higher Notability: Rebel Moon: Part One – A Child of Fire, Fool’s Paradise, Ghosted, Aquaman and the Lost Kingdom, Expend4bles, House Party, Haunted Mansion, Heart of Stone, The Out-Laws, Meg 2: The Trench, Old Dads, My Big Fat Greek Wedding 3, 65, Your Place or Mine, White Men Can’t Jump, Vacation Friends 2, The Exorcist: Believer, About My Father, The Family Plan, Insidious: The Red Door, and 10 more; Lower RT: Freelance, The Ritual Killer, 57 Seconds, Expend4bles, In the Fire, On a Wing and a Prayer, Fool’s Paradise, The Tutor, Vacation Friends 2, Robots, The Re-Education of Molly Singer, The Out-Laws, Knights of the Zodiac, Mafia Mamma, The Exorcist: Believer, Pet Sematary: Bloodlines, Pain Hustlers, The Family Plan, God Is a Bullet, Rebel Moon: Part One – A Child of Fire, and 16 more; Notes: We had to pivot to this to some extent because we watched Fear … possibly the biggest blunder in recent BMT history. This movie seems far more fun even if it is probably “better”.

RogerEbert.com – 2.0 stars – You ultimately don’t need to care that much about why Abby bonds so quickly with Freddy and the gang, or why Vanessa knows so much about Freddy. But it might have helped if the movie’s programmatic jump scares and mostly unremarkable performances were more memorable. As it is, the movie is both too fast and too slow to be either shocking or moving enough. “Five Nights at Freddy’s” might satisfy the series’ established fans, but everyone else will have to look elsewhere for fun.

(Yup, this is exactly what I heard, that the film was very solid for people who knew the games (and the lore) but no so much otherwise. And I do know stuff about the games since I’ve vaguely watched videos of people playing it. So maybe that bodes well.)

Trailer – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X4d_v-HyR4o/

(I wonder if the kind-of-too-famous guy in the trailer is the bad guy … looks kind of fun, but I can already tell it ends up being more silly than scary in reality. The kill where the girl gets eaten by the robot seems potentially fun though.)

Directors – Emma Tammi – ( Known For: The Wind; BMT: Five Nights at Freddy’s; Notes: She wrote this as well and will be writing I think both a second and third film maybe.)

Writers – Scott Cawthon – ( BMT: Five Nights at Freddy’s; Notes: Huh. The video game creator, but also back in the 90s he used to make bad looking CGI Christian films. So he seems like a 3D artist.)

Seth Cuddeback – ( BMT: Five Nights at Freddy’s; Notes: Nothing else of note, I think the weird bit is that all of these people have future credits on the sequels. I would assume at least a few just did a pass on the first, so I don’t know why IMDb would be thinking they would be attached to the second unless they either are, or there is some default thing happening.)

Emma Tammi – ( BMT: Five Nights at Freddy’s; Notes: She also directed a bit of Into the Dark which is a horror anthology television show.)

Chris Lee Hill – ( Known For: Tragedy Girls; V/H/S/99; Patchwork; Blowing Up Right Now; BMT: Five Nights at Freddy’s; Notes: Alright, here we go. This person definitely was a “horror” person they had do a pass on the script since they are not attached to the sequels.)

Tyler MacIntyre – ( Known For: Tragedy Girls; V/H/S/99; Patchwork; BMT: Five Nights at Freddy’s; Notes: Huh, was mostly an editor (and not even of horror films necessarily), but seems to have tacked to writing pretty high profile horror in the past few years.)

Actors – Josh Hutcherson – ( Known For: The Hunger Games; The Hunger Games: Catching Fire; The Hunger Games: Mockingjay – Part 1; The Hunger Games: Mockingjay – Part 2; The Polar Express; Bridge to Terabithia; The Disaster Artist; The Kids Are All Right; Journey to the Center of the Earth; Zathura: A Space Adventure; Journey 2: The Mysterious Island; Epic; American Splendor; Kicking & Screaming; Little Manhattan; Escobar: Paradise Lost; Detention; Tragedy Girls; Winged Creatures; Burn; Future BMT: RV; Cirque du Freak: The Vampire’s Assistant; Firehouse Dog; BMT: Red Dawn; Five Nights at Freddy’s; Notes: He is in probably one of the more anticipated early year BMT films, The Beekeeper starring Jason Statham. I really hope that hits so we can get a nice Winter Season live in.)

Piper Rubio – ( BMT: Five Nights at Freddy’s; Notes: Probably most notable for a recent four episode turn on For All Mankind.)

Elizabeth Lail – ( Known For: Gonzo Girl; Future BMT: Mack & Rita; BMT: Five Nights at Freddy’s; Countdown; Notes: Was recently in You (the Netflix show) which I think must be finished by now since I think it was intended to only go four seasons.)

Budget/Gross – $20 million / Domestic: $137,275,620 (Worldwide: $290,501,123)

(Jesus Christ … I mean … Jesus Christ. Yeah, that’s why you play the game. Horror can really just print money. This film only cost $20 million (basically a set and some dark hard to see CGI I guess, only need one reasonably priced star), so that is a lot of dough.)

Rotten Tomatoes – 31% (66/211): Loaded with Easter eggs, Five Nights at Freddy’s may be fun to watch for fans of the game, but most viewers of any other persuasion will find this adaptation muddled and decidedly unscary.

(Yes. This is everything I’ve heard about the film. That it isn’t a good film, but (as Ebert used to say) it is good for what it is. Although I actually think the reviews are like: it’s bad for what it is but also the fans will like it.)

Reviewer Highlight: You may chuckle, but it’s hard to tell if the movie is laughing with you. – Natalia Winkelman, New York Times

Poster – Five Crazy Nights

(I find this surprisingly boring. I like the sign, obviously, but otherwise seems a little ‘blah’ for a film about a killer Chuck E. Cheese or whatever. Some of the alternated are better. C+.)

Tagline(s) – Can you survive? (D)

(Nah. That’s no fun. Think of how many films this could apply to.)

Keyword(s) – Year 2023

Top 10: Oppenheimer (2023), Barbie (2023), Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 (2023), Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse (2023), John Wick: Chapter 4 (2023), Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania (2023), The Super Mario Bros. Movie (2023), Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves (2023), Mission: Impossible – Dead Reckoning Part One (2023), The Flash (2023)

Future BMT: 84.6 Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey (2023), 67.0 The Exorcist: Believer (2023), 48.0 Insidious: The Red Door (2023), 43.8 Fool’s Paradise (2023), 43.5 House Party (2023), 37.2 Paint (2023), 35.8 Freelance (2023), 31.6 The Machine (2023), 28.1 Haunted Mansion (2023), 27.7 Love Again (2023), 24.9 Aquaman and the Lost Kingdom (2023), 20.9 The Marsh King’s Daughter (2023), 18.4 Nefarious (2023), 9.1 The Shift (2023), 9.1 Camp Hideout (2023), 8.8 Back on the Strip (2023), 8.3 Sweetwater (2023)

BMT: Meg 2: The Trench (2023), Expend4bles (2023), 65 (2023), Five Nights at Freddy’s (2023), Retribution (2023), Hypnotic (2023), My Big Fat Greek Wedding 3 (2023), Mafia Mamma (2023), About My Father (2023), Fear (2023)

Best Options (imdb-keyword-based-on-video-game): 50.1 Five Nights at Freddy’s (2023)

(I didn’t expect to see another video game film available. I was just curious. Given the success of the Super Mario Bros. this year though I guess I wouldn’t have been survived if I forgot some other film was based on a video game.)

Welcome to Earf (HoE Number 11) – The shortest path through The Movie Database cast lists using only BMT films is: Matthew Lillard is No. 4 billed in Five Nights at Freddy’s and No. 3 billed in Wicker Park, which also stars Josh Hartnett (No. 1 billed) who is in Here on Earth (No. 3 billed) => (4 + 3) + (1 + 3) = 11. If we were to watch Firehouse Dog we can get the HoE Number down to 10.

Notes – Because of Foxy’s skeletal-like structure, he was built as a full-body animatronic puppet and performed by Russ Walko, along with a group of puppeteers from Jim Henson’s Creature Shop. In shots where Foxy walked, it took as many as six puppeteers to accomplish his full range of movements.

Unlike most studios using CGI for bringing creatures to life, Jim Henson’s Creature Shop was responsible for the creation of the Fazbear animatronics.

The animatronic characters were performed by puppeteers from Jim Henson’s Creature Shop. For shots where the characters weren’t moving, the puppeteers would control both the head and body movements. In the rare instances where a character would walk or dance, a stunt performer would don the costume while the puppeteers controlled the heads remotely.

Even before the movie was released, producer Jason Blum said that it had already made back its budget from selling the streaming and theatrical distribution rights.

In August 2018, Scott Cawthon said that if the first film were to be successful, there could be a second and third film, following the events of the second and third games, respectively. In January 2023, in an interview on the podcast WeeklyMTG, Matthew Lillard revealed he signed a three-picture deal with the studios.

My Big Fat Greek Wedding 3 Preview

The labyrinth is playing tricks on Patrick’s mind. Every time he turns a corner he catches a glimpse of Jamie and his demon lovers, but just as quickly he’s gone. “How are they so fast?” Patrick thinks, but then remembers that they are demons. When he turns the next corner he finds himself in a fancy restaurant. “What thuuuu…” Patrick says dumbly. “What thuuuu… What thuuuuu… cat got your tongue, Patrick?” Patrick hears Jamie say from behind him. “And where’s the wife? I was really hoping the whole gang could be here tonight.” Patrick turns slowly and sees Jamie and the two demons sitting at a table set for five. “She’s, uh…” Patrick says, but he shakes his head. This isn’t real. This is all meaningless. He has to keep a grasp on the real world. He sits down without saying more. “Riiight, well if this is everyone I have a speech.” Jamie says and the demons coo in their creepy demon way. “Before I met you two I was afraid. Afraid of life. Afraid of the future. But now I realize that the only thing I have to fear is fear itself. And that’s a Jamie original quote you can take to the bank.” Everyone in the restaurant applauds at his very original toast. “I love you,” Jamie says and the two demons croak an “I love you” back and it sounds like the voices of a thousand damned souls. “Will you…” Jamie takes a deep breath, “Will you marry me?” The nerdy demon faints and the sexy minx demon smooches Jamie deeply. “What…” Patrick stammers, stumbling backwards, “No… What is this devil…” Jamie smiles too broadly in his direction, his eyes speaking a horror that belies the glee in his Ray Liotta-like mask face. “Demon Wedding!” That’s right! We are partaking in the most damned of BMT weddings. That would be the two (that’s right, two!) Big Fat Greek Wedding sequels. The first was an unlikely smash. The other two? Not as much. Let’s go!

My Big Fat Greek Wedding 3 (2023) – BMeTric: 38.6; Notability: 28

StreetCreditReport.com – BMeTric: top 9.6%; Notability: top 2.8%; Rotten Tomatoes: top 14.4%; Higher BMeT: The Exorcist: Believer, Meg 2: The Trench, Expend4bles, The Black Demon, Knights of the Zodiac, Pet Sematary: Bloodlines, 65, The Ritual Killer, Five Nights at Freddy’s, The Out-Laws, Insidious: The Red Door, Maybe I Do, White Men Can’t Jump, Retribution, In the Fire, Hypnotic, House Party, Fool’s Paradise, Heart of Stone, Locked In, and 4 more; Higher Notability: Fool’s Paradise, Ghosted, Expend4bles, House Party, Haunted Mansion, Heart of Stone, The Out-Laws; Lower RT: Confidential Informant, Freelance, The Ritual Killer, 57 Seconds, Assassin Club, Expend4bles, In the Fire, On a Wing and a Prayer, Fool’s Paradise, The Tutor, Vacation Friends 2, Robots, The Re-Education of Molly Singer, The Out-Laws, Knights of the Zodiac, Mafia Mamma, The Exorcist: Believer, Pet Sematary: Bloodlines, Pain Hustlers, God Is a Bullet, and 10 more; Notes: I think ultimately we did fine for the end of the year cycle, but if things continue this way we’ll probably have to think through a new metric. It was quite a scramble to put things together.

RogerEbert.com – 1.5 stars – The original 2002 “My Big Fat Greek Wedding” is one of the most financially successful movies ever made, in terms of cost-to-return, earning over $360 million worldwide on a $5 million production budget. Of course, there would be sequels; the only mystery is why there haven’t been five or ten by now, rather than just two. The films are formulaic, but it’s an appealing formula, like a family recipe for a comfort food dish that isn’t going to win any Michelin stars but satisfies because it reminds you of being loved and taken care of. … This second sequel is escapist in a next-level way: it escapes from drama as well as life. The Greek tourism board is going to love it.

(Yup. That is also a bit confusing but I think ultimately it comes down to: Nia Vardalos didn’t want to do them until she had to / she was ready for MBFGW to maybe be a franchise she churns out. Unfortunately I think they waited too long if that was the plan. It would have made a lot more sense to have already done five and be calling it a day by now. I guess I could see a fourth though with the idea being it is the daughter’s wedding and now they are the weird Greek parents.)

Trailer – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AAflXqZ5xs0/

(A lot of things happened … my father passed away. Well that is a downer of start to the trailer. The movie looks quite nice. But also it seems probably like it is not funny.)

Directors – Nia Vardalos – ( Known For: I Hate Valentine’s Day; BMT: My Big Fat Greek Wedding 3; Notes: Canadian actually, although her parents are (obviously) Greek. She is a US citizen now though.)

Writers – Nia Vardalos – ( Known For: My Big Fat Greek Wedding; I Hate Valentine’s Day; Connie and Carla; Future BMT: Larry Crowne; BMT: My Big Fat Greek Wedding 2; My Big Fat Greek Wedding 3; Notes: Her actual father was in the first two films in a small Greek role.)

Actors – Nia Vardalos – ( Known For: My Big Fat Greek Wedding; For a Good Time, Call…; The Curse of Bridge Hollow; I Hate Valentine’s Day; Connie and Carla; Wonder Woman: Bloodlines; Charming; Helicopter Mom; Dealin’ with Idiots; McKenna Shoots for the Stars; Men Seeking Women; Car Dogs; Future BMT: Larry Crowne; My Life in Ruins; BMT: My Big Fat Greek Wedding 2; My Big Fat Greek Wedding 3; Notes: Was married to one of the minor stars of the first and second film, Ian Gomez, who plays her husband’s police officer friend.)

John Corbett – ( Known For: Tombstone; My Big Fat Greek Wedding; To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before; Serendipity; Volcano; The Silence; To All the Boys: P.S. I Still Love You; To All the Boys: Always and Forever; 47 Meters Down: Uncaged; Gully; The Burning Plain; Ramona and Beezus; I Hate Valentine’s Day; Dinner Rush; Baby on Board; Elvis Has Left the Building; The Lookalike; Dreamland; All Saints; Bigger Than the Sky; Future BMT: Street Kings; The Messengers; Raising Helen; Raise Your Voice; Flight of the Intruder; God’s Not Dead: A Light in Darkness; BMT: Sex and the City 2; The Boy Next Door; My Big Fat Greek Wedding 2; My Big Fat Greek Wedding 3; Notes: Done a lot of random television, although still Sex in the City. And he’s somehow an integral part of the To All the Boys series.)

Louis Mandylor – ( Known For: My Big Fat Greek Wedding; Avengement; Doom: Annihilation; The Doorman; Daylight’s End; Sinners and Saints; One in the Chamber; Wrong Turn at Tahoe; The Game of Their Lives; Code of Honor; Night Walk; Renegades; Not Another Not Another Movie; Take; Antidote; Gang of Roses; Suckers; The Prometheus Project; Betrayal; Sorority Party Massacre; Future BMT: Mafia!; Necessary Roughness; BMT: Rambo: Last Blood; My Big Fat Greek Wedding 2; Memory; The Quest; My Big Fat Greek Wedding 3; Notes: Wait … he got third billing? His storyline in this is while. He has a crazy bad fake tan, and whitens his teeth, and dyes his hair and looks crazy. Reminder: this film is supposed to take place like six months after the original … yeah. Notably played “Joey’s Twin” on Friends.)

Budget/Gross – N/A / Domestic: $28,496,030 (Worldwide: $39,008,828)

(You know what? That ain’t bad. I would guess the film still cost around $20 million to make because I bet Greece itself paid a bunch for the location. So it might have actually turned a profit.)

Rotten Tomatoes – 29% (27/94): Amiable and sunny if often unamusing, My Big Fat Greek Wedding 3 repeats much of what audiences loved the first time around but suffers from diminishing returns.

(It got better reviews than the second one! That is kind of weird. That rating is pretty much in line what I would have expected as well.)

Reviewer Highlight: The script functions like a recipe for its own opening shot of baklava; flattened and bland, Toula exists only to constrain the nuts. – Amy Nicholson, New York Times

Poster – A Wedding So Nice They Did it Thrice

(I’m just going to give this a C and move on. It’s the same as the second. Same as the first but doesn’t work as well because without the family trying to bust in from the side the spacing just seems weird.)

Tagline(s) – They’re Headed to the Homeland

(Sure. C-. I mean, you can’t just say what it is and get it by me. I’m pretty strict when it comes to grading the taglines.)

Keyword(s) – Year 2023

Top 10: Oppenheimer (2023), Barbie (2023), Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 (2023), Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse (2023), John Wick: Chapter 4 (2023), Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania (2023), The Super Mario Bros. Movie (2023), Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves (2023), Mission: Impossible – Dead Reckoning Part One (2023), The Flash (2023)

Future BMT: 84.4 Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey (2023), 66.6 The Exorcist: Believer (2023), 50.0 Five Nights at Freddy’s (2023), 47.9 Insidious: The Red Door (2023), 43.3 House Party (2023), 43.0 Fool’s Paradise (2023), 37.0 Paint (2023), 32.9 Freelance (2023), 31.4 The Machine (2023), 28.1 Haunted Mansion (2023), 27.4 Love Again (2023), 19.8 The Marsh King’s Daughter (2023), 18.3 Nefarious (2023), 9.1 Camp Hideout (2023), 8.2 Sweetwater (2023), 7.9 Back on the Strip (2023)

BMT: Meg 2: The Trench (2023), Expend4bles (2023), 65 (2023), Retribution (2023), Hypnotic (2023), Mafia Mamma (2023), My Big Fat Greek Wedding 3 (2023), About My Father (2023), Fear (2023)

Best Options (Romance): 36.4 My Big Fat Greek Wedding 3 (2023), 27.4 Love Again (2023)

(The only real good option. Looking at the ones we’ve done this year though … we did pretty well! I’m surprised.)

Welcome to Earf (HoE Number 16) – The shortest path through The Movie Database cast lists using only BMT films is: Lainie Kazan is No. 4 billed in My Big Fat Greek Wedding 3 and No. 4 billed in Gigli, which also stars Ben Affleck (No. 1 billed) who is in Pearl Harbor (No. 1 billed) which also stars Josh Hartnett (No. 3 billed) who is in Here on Earth (No. 3 billed) => (4 + 4) + (1 + 1) + (3 + 3) = 16. There is no shorter path at the moment.

Notes – Michael Constantine passed away in 2021. This movie is dedicated to his memory.

Michael Constantine, Bruce Gray, and Constantine Vardalos all passed away after My Big Fat Greek Wedding 2. This film is dedicated to them.

First film that doesn’t feature Ian Gomez.

This movie only takes one year after the events of My Big Fat Wedding 2.

Elias Kacavis (Aristotle) wears a shirt that says “The Second City Chicago”. Nia Vardalos was a member of The Second City comedy group at the beginning of her career.

My Big Fat Greek Wedding 2 Preview

The labyrinth is playing tricks on Patrick’s mind. Every time he turns a corner he catches a glimpse of Jamie and his demon lovers, but just as quickly he’s gone. “How are they so fast?” Patrick thinks, but then remembers that they are demons. When he turns the next corner he finds himself in a fancy restaurant. “What thuuuu…” Patrick says dumbly. “What thuuuu… What thuuuuu… cat got your tongue, Patrick?” Patrick hears Jamie say from behind him. “And where’s the wife? I was really hoping the whole gang could be here tonight.” Patrick turns slowly and sees Patrick and the two demons sitting at a table set for five. “She’s, uh…” Patrick says, but he shakes his head. This isn’t real. This is all meaningless. He has to keep a grasp on the real world. He sits down without saying more. “Riiight, well if this is everyone I have a speech.” Jamie says and the demons coo in their creepy demon way. “Before I met you two I was afraid. Afraid of life. Afraid of the future. But now I realize that the only thing I have to fear is fear itself. And that’s a Jamie original quote you can take to the bank.” Everyone in the restaurant applauds at his very original toast. “I love you,” Jamie says and the two demons croak an “I love you” back and it sounds like the voices of a thousand damned souls. “Will you…” Jamie takes a deep breath, “Will you marry me?” The nerdy demon faints and the sexy minx demon smooches Jamie deeply. “What…” Patrick stammers, stumbling backwards, “No… What is this devil…” Jamie smiles too broadly in his direction, his eyes speaking a horror that belies the glee in his Ray Liotta-like mask face. “Demon Wedding!” That’s right! We are partaking in the most damned of BMT weddings. That would be the two (that’s right, two!) Big Fat Greek Wedding sequels. The first was an unlikely smash. The other two? Not as much. Let’s go! 

My Big Fat Greek Wedding 2 (2016) – BMeTric: 30.8; Notability: 36

StreetCreditReport.com – BMeTric: top 21.2%; Notability: top 13.2%; Rotten Tomatoes: top 20.9%; Higher BMeT: Fifty Shades of Black, Cell, Zoolander 2, Yoga Hosers, The Forest, Exposed, Cabin Fever, Meet the Blacks, Max Steel, The Darkness, Dark Crimes, God’s Not Dead 2, Blair Witch, Independence Day: Resurgence, The 5th Wave, Shut In, Gods of Egypt, Get a Job, The Boss, The Other Side of the Door, and 33 more; Higher Notability: Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice, Suicide Squad, Zoolander 2, Independence Day: Resurgence, Alice Through the Looking Glass, The Brothers Grimsby, Warcraft, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out of the Shadows, Allegiant, Kingsglaive: Final Fantasy XV, The Huntsman: Winter’s War, Ice Age: Collision Course, Now You See Me 2, Ben-Hur, The Legend of Tarzan, The Great Wall, Criminal, Live by Night, Assassin’s Creed, Gods of Egypt, and 13 more; Lower RT: True Memoirs of an International Assassin, Max Steel, Dark Crimes, Hacker, Cabin Fever, The Darkness, Fifty Shades of Black, Shut In, Misconduct, Mother’s Day, Exposed, The Do-Over, Get a Job, I.T., I Am Wrath, God’s Not Dead 2, The Forest, Dirty Grandpa, Cell, The Choice, and 32 more; Notes: We are five for ten on the higher notability count, but otherwise on BMeT and RT we aren’t looking so hot. Although the only one I would say I’m super excited for is eventually watching Max Steel.

RogerEbert.com – 1.0 stars – The original “My Big Fat Greek Wedding” was a fluke. A charming, warmhearted fluke, but a fluke nonetheless. It was broad and sitcom-y but it resonated with a wide array of moviegoers, despite the peculiarities of its cultural specificity, and it made a mind-boggling $369 million worldwide in 2002 … Her script is a mess, and no amount of Windex can clean it up.

(Wow, that is way lower than I would have expected. The film isn’t good, but it also isn’t the worst thing I’ve ever seen. Mostly it is just aggravating. This franchise oddly grew out of the era of horrible awkwardness and this film is now exception.)

Trailer – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JQ-1Ts3BChM/

(The jokes are terrible and honestly the “Why do you want to leave me!” is maybe the worst line of the series. It makes her look like a lunatic … which maybe the character is? But at least we have a story that seems somewhat fun and makes sense.)

Directors – Kirk Jones – ( Known For: Nanny McPhee; Everybody’s Fine; Waking Ned Devine; BMT: What to Expect When You’re Expecting; My Big Fat Greek Wedding 2; Notes: I think he might be retired. I wonder if this film was basically one last check to get him into a relatively early retirement (he was early 50s at the time). He was somewhat famous for advertising.)

Writers – Nia Vardalos – ( Known For: My Big Fat Greek Wedding; I Hate Valentine’s Day; Connie and Carla; Future BMT: Larry Crowne; BMT: My Big Fat Greek Wedding 2; My Big Fat Greek Wedding 3; Notes: She’s the main actress in the series and eventually directs the third. She’s done a lot of random stuff over the years, but almost certainly can just live off of My Big Fat Greek Wedding if she wanted to.)

Actors – Nia Vardalos – ( Known For: My Big Fat Greek Wedding; For a Good Time, Call…; The Curse of Bridge Hollow; I Hate Valentine’s Day; Connie and Carla; Wonder Woman: Bloodlines; Charming; Helicopter Mom; Dealin’ with Idiots; McKenna Shoots for the Stars; Men Seeking Women; Car Dogs; Future BMT: Larry Crowne; My Life in Ruins; BMT: My Big Fat Greek Wedding 2; My Big Fat Greek Wedding 3; Notes: The first movie started as a one woman play and Rita Wilson saw it and got Tom Hanks to produce a movie out of it.)

John Corbett – ( Known For: Tombstone; My Big Fat Greek Wedding; To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before; Serendipity; Volcano; The Silence; To All the Boys: P.S. I Still Love You; To All the Boys: Always and Forever; 47 Meters Down: Uncaged; Gully; The Burning Plain; Ramona and Beezus; I Hate Valentine’s Day; Dinner Rush; Baby on Board; Elvis Has Left the Building; The Lookalike; Dreamland; All Saints; Bigger Than the Sky; Future BMT: Street Kings; The Messengers; Raising Helen; Raise Your Voice; Flight of the Intruder; God’s Not Dead: A Light in Darkness; BMT: Sex and the City 2; The Boy Next Door; My Big Fat Greek Wedding 2; My Big Fat Greek Wedding 3; Notes: I would have guessed his Emmy nom was for Sex in the City, but nope, he got a nomination in 1992 for Supporting Actor for Northern Exposure. He was Aiden Shaw in Sex in the City which IIRC was basically the “other guy” Carrie could have ended up with in the end. He shows up in the second movie.)

Michael Constantine – ( Known For: My Big Fat Greek Wedding; The Hustler; My Life; Prancer; Deadfall; Hawaii; Voyage of the Damned; The Reivers; If It’s Tuesday, This Must Be Belgium; Pray for Death; Skidoo; The North Avenue Irregulars; In the Mood; Don’t Drink the Water; Peeper; Beau Geste; Justine; The Last Mile; Island of Love; Forty Days of Musa Dagh; Future BMT: Thinner; The Juror; BMT: My Big Fat Greek Wedding 2; Notes: He was quite old in the second film and ultimately died in 2021. He won an Emmy for Room 222 in 1970.)

Budget/Gross – $18 million / Domestic: $59,689,605 (Worldwide: $90,632,641)

(That still ain’t bad. I’m a little surprised they managed to keep the cost below $20 million. Given the success of the first they could have blown it out for some destination version which they ultimately did for the third.)

Rotten Tomatoes – 27% (48/175): My Big Fat Greek Wedding 2 is as sweet and harmless as the original, but its collection of sitcom gags and stereotypes never coalesces into anything resembling a story with a purpose.

(Yeah, that sounds about right. I mean, that was the same with the first, but at the time that felt at least somewhat fresh and original.)

NY Times Review: Even those who have spent the last 14 years pining for a sequel to “My Big Fat Greek Wedding” – by most accounts, the highest-grossing American romantic comedy – will rue that longing when they experience “My Big Fat Greek Wedding 2.” – Jeannette Catsoulis, New York Time

Poster – A Wedding So Nice They Did it Twice

(I like the blue. Like the font. Obviously just redoing the first poster with whatever changes are necessary. Doesn’t work as well as in the first because you don’t really know what this is about. First was good, this one retreats back to being mediocre. C.)

Tagline(s) – People change. Greeks don’t. (B)

(I like it. Short, sweet, and we know we are in for the retread. Sure there are differences, but the important stuff will be the same. Good enough for a tagline.)

Keyword(s) – Year 2023

Top 10: Oppenheimer (2023), Barbie (2023), Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 (2023), Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse (2023), John Wick: Chapter 4 (2023), Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania (2023), The Super Mario Bros. Movie (2023), Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves (2023), Mission: Impossible – Dead Reckoning Part One (2023), The Flash (2023)

Future BMT: 84.4 Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey (2023), 66.6 The Exorcist: Believer (2023), 50.0 Five Nights at Freddy’s (2023), 47.9 Insidious: The Red Door (2023), 43.3 House Party (2023), 43.0 Fool’s Paradise (2023), 37.0 Paint (2023), 32.9 Freelance (2023), 31.4 The Machine (2023), 28.1 Haunted Mansion (2023), 27.4 Love Again (2023), 19.8 The Marsh King’s Daughter (2023), 18.3 Nefarious (2023), 9.1 Camp Hideout (2023), 8.2 Sweetwater (2023), 7.9 Back on the Strip (2023)

BMT: Meg 2: The Trench (2023), Expend4bles (2023), 65 (2023), Retribution (2023), Hypnotic (2023), Mafia Mamma (2023), My Big Fat Greek Wedding 3 (2023), About My Father (2023), Fear (2023)

Best Options (Romance): 36.4 My Big Fat Greek Wedding 3 (2023), 27.4 Love Again (2023)

(Yeah not very many good options this year. If I had my druthers we wouldn’t have even done this since it ended up dragging the second along with it was which a bit of a chore.)

Welcome to Earf (HoE Number 17) – The shortest path through The Movie Database cast lists using only BMT films is: Lainie Kazan is No. 5 billed in My Big Fat Greek Wedding 2 and No. 4 billed in Gigli, which also stars Ben Affleck (No. 1 billed) who is in Pearl Harbor (No. 1 billed) which also stars Josh Hartnett (No. 3 billed) who is in Here on Earth (No. 3 billed) => (5 + 4) + (1 + 1) + (3 + 3) = 17. If we were to watch Raising Helen, and Two for the Money we can get the HoE Number down to 16.

Notes – Nia Vardalos’ husband in real life at the time of filming, Ian Gomez was also in this film as Mike. They later divorced.

This sequel took over 13 years to be made and contains mostly all of the cast and crew from the first My Big Fat Greek Wedding (2002).

Filmed in Canada in Toronto’s Greektown area.

Mana-Yiayia speaks English for the first time in this film. In the previous film, she only speaks in Greek.

Third film that John Corbett and Nia Vardalos have been in together.

Fear (2023) Preview

Jamie and Patrick look around them. They are no longer in the Antiquities Room. They don’t appear to be in a room at all. Instead it seems they’ve been transported to a dark, mysterious labyrinth. Screams of terror and pain (or is it pleasure?) surround them. They look forwards and then back, but the maze looks identical no matter where they look. “Should we just start…” Jamie begins but stops. A figure has appeared in front of them. They nervously turn back the other direction and… uh oh, another figure has appeared there as well. Jamie squits and after a moment of recognition his face turns bright. “Demon #1, my love, how are you?” he says to the first demon, who appears to be a nerdy lawyer he could grow old with. “And Demon #2, my darling, still having trouble with the truth?” he says, turning to the second demon, who is a sultry minx that Jamie could love, even though he knows she’d be bad for him. “Your hunky, muscle-bound guys have return,” he finishes with a debonair flourish. The demons appear to be taken aback. It looks like they want to says something to Jamie, but it’s hard to tell if they can talk. What would happen if they opened their mouths? Patrick doesn’t want to find out. They approach and Patrick readies a patented Twin Chop, but instead of sucking them into an otherworldly dimension they each grab one of Jamie’s arms and begin to coo in a loving and very disturbing way. They begin to pull Jamie through a side entrance in the maze (“Was that there the whole time?”, Jamie wonders). “They want us to go this way,” Jamie calls over his shoulder cheerily. Despite his intense fear, Patrick quickly follows the trio. That’s right! We are indeed watching Fear, a long delayed horror film made in the pandemic. By all accounts this delay made for a strange and very bad film. It’s a wonder they took it wide the theaters at all. Why not just dump it somewhere? Time to find out. Let’s go!

Fear (2023) – BMeTric: 26.0; Notability: 15

StreetCreditReport.com – BMeTric: top 16.8%; Notability: top 12.4%; Rotten Tomatoes: top 6.3%; Higher BMeT: Expend4bles, The Exorcist: Believer, Meg 2: The Trench, The Black Demon, Knights of the Zodiac, Pet Sematary: Bloodlines, 65, The Ritual Killer, Five Nights at Freddy’s, The Out-Laws, Insidious: The Red Door, Best. Christmas. Ever!, White Men Can’t Jump, Maybe I Do, Retribution, Hypnotic, In the Fire, House Party, Fool’s Paradise, Heart of Stone, and 22 more; Higher Notability: Fool’s Paradise, Ghosted, Expend4bles, House Party, Haunted Mansion, Heart of Stone, The Out-Laws, Meg 2: The Trench, Old Dads, My Big Fat Greek Wedding 3, 65, Your Place or Mine, Vacation Friends 2, White Men Can’t Jump, The Exorcist: Believer, About My Father, Insidious: The Red Door, Pain Hustlers, Love Again, Genie, and 11 more; Lower RT: Confidential Informant, The Ritual Killer, 57 Seconds, Assassin Club, Expend4bles, In the Fire, On a Wing and a Prayer, Fool’s Paradise, The Tutor, Vacation Friends 2, Robots, The Out-Laws, Knights of the Zodiac; Notes: This movie is quite perplexing. In reality we should have done Five Nights at Freddy’s though. Bigger deal, and an actual horror film. We’ll get that back though.

Richard Roeper – 3 stars –  It’s the perfect storm for the group to start turning on one another, even as the supernatural elements boil and bubble to the surface, and the blood starts to spill. Way to pick a vacation destination, Rom. What, the Overlook Hotel was booked?

(Amazing. He actually mostly says that the film revels in its unoriginality and he kind of respects it for that. Ridiculous as that might sound.)

Trailer – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s2znvShl2GM/

(Yeah … this looks horrible. They shouldn’t have shown the terrible death effect. Because it looks dumb and they should have hidden that from the audience for as long as possible.)

Directors – Deon Taylor – ( Known For: Black and Blue; Fatale; Chain Letter; Supremacy; Dead Tone; The House Next Door: Meet the Blacks 2; Nite Tales: The Movie; Future BMT: Meet the Blacks; Traffik; BMT: The Intruder; Fear; Notes: Has a few upcoming projects including one called All-Star Weekend which has the description of “Two buddies form a rivalry over their favorite American basketball player,” which sounds ludicrous.)

Writers – John Ferry – (BMT: Fear;  Notes: Basically he appears to be a production assistant for at first Trank (on Chronicle) and now Taylor, and this is the first film he got a credit for writing with him.)

Deon Taylor – ( Known For: Nite Tales: The Movie; Future BMT: Meet the Blacks; Traffik; BMT: Fear; Notes: Writes a lot of the films he directs. Also produces them as well, so he is kind of a younger Tyler Perry in a way.)

Actors – Joseph Sikora – ( Known For: Shutter Island; Jack Reacher; My Best Friend’s Wedding; Ghost World; Charlie Wilson’s War; Safe; Trust; Night Skies; BMT: The Watcher; The Intruder; Fear; Notes: He’s older than I would have thought, 47 years old. To the point where he had a whole other acting life as a bit part acting in major films. He was in over 60 episodes of a tv show called Power recently, and does a lot of television.)

Andrew Bachelor – ( Known For: Greenland; To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before; The Babysitter; Holidate; When We First Met; The Babysitter: Killer Queen; Game Over, Man!; Vacation Friends; Rim of the World; Coffee & Kareem; The F**k-It List; Airplane Mode; Love, Weddings & Other Disasters; Where’s the Money; The House Next Door: Meet the Blacks 2; National Champions; Family Switch; Future BMT: We Are Your Friends; Meet the Blacks; BMT: Fifty Shades of Black; Fear; Notes: Known as King Bach apparently. Was a world class high jumper in college, and also holds (and will forever hold) the record for most followers on Vine at 15 million which is how his career started.)

Annie Ilonzeh – ( Known For: Percy Jackson: Şimşek Hırsızı; Erkekler Ne Söyler Kadınlar Ne Anlar; Agent Game; Til Death Do Us Part; Future BMT: İntikam Meleği; All Eyez on Me; BMT: Miss March; Fear; Notes: Primarily she was a decently long running actor on Chicago Fire appearing in 42 episodes of that show.)

Budget/Gross – N/A / Domestic: $2,090,261 (Worldwide: $2,090,261)

(Yeah quite terrible. My guess is the movie cost around $5 million to make. I don’t think it is possible to really make even a low budget horror fit for wide release for less. Just the cameras and salaries probably get over the $1 million you’d need to have this be profitable.)

Rotten Tomatoes – 21% (4/19)

(I can’t believe this has this high of a rating. If I were to make a consensus it would be: Lazy in its metaphors for the pandemic, lazy in its oscillation between various horror sub-genres, and lazy in its concept. Yet the biggest crime is it isn’t scary.)

Reviewer Highlight: It is frustrating to watch Fear carelessly oscillate between creature feature, haunted house movie, and folk horror. – Matthew Monagle, Austin Chronicle

Poster – Fear Leads to Anger

(Ha. I mean it looks cool. But I don’t understand the question mark. Is the film called “Fear?” I didn’t think so. Like the yellow but neads better font. C-.)

Tagline(s) – Your Mind is the Trap (C+)

(I guess this is intriguing. Like… the horror film where your mind is used against you. You think a murderer is trapping you but you are trapping yourself. Again, it’s a cool concept, like the post is cool looking, but it doesn’t work completely.)

Keyword(s) – Year 2023

Top 10: Oppenheimer (2023), Barbie (2023), Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 (2023), Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse (2023), John Wick: Chapter 4 (2023), Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania (2023), The Super Mario Bros. Movie (2023), Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves (2023), Mission: Impossible – Dead Reckoning Part One (2023), The Flash (2023)

Future BMT: 84.2 Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey (2023), 63.3 The Exorcist: Believer (2023), 49.8 Five Nights at Freddy’s (2023), 47.8 Insidious: The Red Door (2023), 43.2 House Party (2023), 41.9 Fool’s Paradise (2023), 37.6 My Big Fat Greek Wedding 3 (2023), 36.7 Paint (2023), 31.3 The Machine (2023), 28.0 Haunted Mansion (2023), 27.2 Love Again (2023), 18.3 Nefarious (2023), 15.7 Freelance (2023), 14.3 The Marsh King’s Daughter (2023), 8.4 Camp Hideout (2023), 8.1 Sweetwater (2023), 6.0 Back on the Strip (2023)

BMT: Expend4bles (2023), Meg 2: The Trench (2023), 65 (2023), Retribution (2023), Hypnotic (2023), Mafia Mamma (2023), About My Father (2023), Fear (2023)

Best Options (Horror): 84.2 Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey (2023), 63.3 The Exorcist: Believer (2023), 49.8 Five Nights at Freddy’s (2023), 47.8 Insidious: The Red Door (2023), 26.4 Fear (2023), 18.3 Nefarious (2023)

(Do not fear (get it?) we will be watching The Exorcist: Believer. And also do not fear (get it?) we’ll NEVER watch Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey. Ever. I refuse.)

Welcome to Earf (HoE Number 21) – The shortest path through The Movie Database cast lists using only BMT films is: Joseph Sikora is No. 1 billed in Fear and No. 2 billed in The Intruder, which also stars Meagan Good (No. 3 billed) who is in The Love Guru (No. 5 billed) which also stars Jessica Alba (No. 2 billed) who is in Mechanic: Resurrection (No. 2 billed) which also stars Jason Statham (No. 1 billed) who is in In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale (No. 1 billed) which also stars Leelee Sobieski (No. 3 billed) who is in Here on Earth (No. 1 billed) => (1 + 2) + (3 + 5) + (2 + 2) + (1 + 1) + (3 + 1) = 21. If we were to watch Underworld: Awakening we can get the HoE Number down to 16.

Notes – Terrance Jenkins was the host of 106 and Park and his hotel room was 106

Hypnotic Preview

Jamie and Patrick shield their eyes as they get off the airplane. It’s hot on the tarmac under the Tuscan sun. It’s been ages since their mother moved to Tuscany to take over the family’s failing olive oil business and things appear to have turned around. “Things have turned around,” their mother’s valet confirms and takes their bags to a waiting stretch hummer. “All this from olive oil?” Jamie whispers as they turn a corner and espy the family’s newly restored Tuscan manor. Patrick is skeptical… and increasingly concerned. For several minutes they wait in the foyer and both look with a smile as the door at the top of the stairs opens up. But rather than their mother they find themselves staring at Luigi, the company’s former manager. “What are you doing here?” Patrick asks in disgust. Everyone knew that Luigi’s corruption was what got the company into dire straits in the first place. A brief grimace crosses Luigi’s face before being replaced by a smile. “I guess you were too busy with your bald movie thing to hear that your mother hired me back when she realized that she needed someone around who knew olive oil.” Jamie turns beet red and gets right up into Luigi’s face. “You know it’s BAD movies, not BALD movies. We’re not idiots. You’re an idiot.” Luigi smiles and nods in acquiescence. “Your mother will be back shortly,” Luigi assures them and shuttles them into an adjacent room. “Why don’t you preoccupy yourself with the Antiquities Room while you wait,” and with that he leaves. Patrick looks around at the treasures that surround them. “We shouldn’t touch anything until we…” he begins, but when he looks over at Jamie he is staring intently at a Puzzle Box. Suddenly Patrick feels very tired. That’s right! We are watching the Ben Affleck classic Hypnotic… you know, the film that everyone knew about. Definitely totally normal that this film never got a DVD release… don’t even worry about it. Let’s go!

Hypnotic (2023) – BMeTric: 45.0; Notability: 19

StreetCreditReport.com – BMeTric: top 5.6%; Notability: top 8.0%; Rotten Tomatoes: top 15.2%; Higher BMeT: Expend4bles, The Exorcist: Believer, Meg 2: The Trench, The Black Demon, Knights of the Zodiac, 65, Pet Sematary: Bloodlines, The Ritual Killer, Five Nights at Freddy’s, The Out-Laws, Insidious: The Red Door, White Men Can’t Jump, Maybe I Do, Retribution; Higher Notability: Fool’s Paradise, Ghosted, Expend4bles, Haunted Mansion, Heart of Stone, The Out-Laws, Old Dads, Meg 2: The Trench, My Big Fat Greek Wedding 3, Foe, 65, Your Place or Mine, White Men Can’t Jump, The Exorcist: Believer, About My Father, Pain Hustlers, Dashing Through the Snow, Insidious: The Red Door, Love Again, Genie; Lower RT: Freelance, The Ritual Killer, 57 Seconds, Assassin Club, Expend4bles, Fool’s Paradise, The Out-Laws, Knights of the Zodiac, Mafia Mamma, The Good Mother, The Exorcist: Believer, Pet Sematary: Bloodlines, Pain Hustlers, Foe, God Is a Bullet, Finestkind, Ghosted, White Men Can’t Jump, Love Again, Meg 2: The Trench, and 12 more; Notes: Given how much money Five Nights at Freddy’s made I’m shocked that it would have a relatively high BMeTric. Like I get it is popular, but shouldn’t the fans who seem to like it a lot and “get it” be driving the rating up? The movies we are getting this time around have such low Notability. Maybe it is a pandemic thing. A way to reduce the number of people on set at any given time. Plausible.

RogerEbert.com – 2.5 stars – There’s a lot of empty space in “Hypnotic,” a doofy, though never boring sci-fi thriller about a Texas cop, played by Ben Affleck, who stumbles upon a conspiracy of mind-controlling crooks. Or he seems to stumble upon them. Reality buckles and warps around our troubled hero, whose daughter has already gone missing before the movie starts.

(And oh yeah, spoiler alert, all that is bullshit and he is himself a mind controlling crook and the entire movie is just twist after twist until you realize that there is basically no moment of the film in which you are watching the 100% god’s honest truth. Great.)

Trailer – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XAwpu4rQpeQ/

(The reviews pretty much call it a poor man’s Inception which is exactly what it looks like. The effects looks okay. Fichtner on the other hand…)

Directors – Robert Rodriguez – ( Known For: Sin City; From Dusk Till Dawn; Alita: Battle Angel; Grindhouse; The Faculty; Spy Kids; Desperado; Planet Terror; Sin City: A Dame to Kill For; Machete; Spy Kids 3: Game Over; Spy Kids: Armageddon; Spy Kids 2: Island of Lost Dreams; Four Rooms; Once Upon a Time in Mexico; We Can Be Heroes; Mimic; El Mariachi; Shorts; Red 11; Future BMT: Spy Kids 4: All the Time in the World; Machete Kills; The Adventures of Sharkboy and Lavagirl 3-D; BMT: Hypnotic; Notes: Wow, our first official Rodriquez, although he have very few surprisingly. I have actually seen Machete Kills though, it is awful.)

Writers – Robert Rodriguez – ( Known For: Sin City; Grindhouse; Spy Kids; Desperado; Planet Terror; Machete; Spy Kids 3: Game Over; Spy Kids: Armageddon; Spy Kids 2: Island of Lost Dreams; Four Rooms; Once Upon a Time in Mexico; We Can Be Heroes; El Mariachi; Shorts; Red 11; Future BMT: Spy Kids 4: All the Time in the World; Machete Kills; The Adventures of Sharkboy and Lavagirl 3-D; UglyDolls; BMT: Hypnotic; Notes: Long time friend of Quentin Tarantino as they both broke into the business with low budget indies around the same time. This film has one son as producer, and another composed the music, they are becoming family affairs.)

Max Borenstein – ( Known For: Kong: Skull Island; Godzilla; Godzilla vs. Kong; Godzilla: King of the Monsters; Worth; BMT: Hypnotic; Notes: He wrote and created the Laker show which was just unceremoniously dumped by HBO a few months ago without resolution.)

Actors – Ben Affleck – ( Known For: The Flash; The Last Duel; Gone Girl; Dazed and Confused; Triple Frontier; Good Will Hunting; Air; Deep Water; The Accountant; Zack Snyder’s Justice League; The Town; Argo; Dogma; Field of Dreams; State of Play; Shakespeare in Love; He’s Just Not That Into You; Daredevil; School Ties; The Sum of All Fears; Future BMT: Surviving Christmas; Buffy the Vampire Slayer; Smokin’ Aces; Live by Night; 200 Cigarettes; BMT: Hypnotic; Suicide Squad; Armageddon; Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice; Justice League; Pearl Harbor; Reindeer Games; Paycheck; Gigli; Phantoms; Runner Runner; Notes: He’s had a bit of a renaissance after going through marital, alcohol-related, and being-too-jacked troubles over the past decade. Has a famously bad tattoo, and was shaped like a triangle in Air and looked ridiculous. I’m happy to report he looks like a normally proportioned human being in this film. It is nuts what being Batman can do to a man.)

Alice Braga – ( Known For: The Suicide Squad; City of God; Soul; I Am Legend; Predators; Elysium; On the Road; Blindness; Crossing Over; The Duel; Lower City; Redbelt; Kill Me Three Times; Journey to the End of the Night; O Cheiro do Ralo; Sólo Dios sabe; City of God: 10 Years Later; Ardor; Latitudes; Future BMT: The New Mutants; The Shack; BMT: Hypnotic; The Rite; Repo Men; Notes: Her mother and aunt were in Kiss of the Spider Woman and she was a kid actress via them before braking out herself.)

JD Pardo – ( Known For: F9: The Fast Saga; The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn – Part 2; The Contractor; Snitch; Havoc; The Burning Plain; Future BMT: A Cinderella Story; BMT: Hypnotic; Supercross; Notes: Played Dom Toretto’s father in flashbacks in F9. I have not seen the later Fast and Furious films. I can’t bring myself to do it.)

Budget/Gross – $65 million / Domestic: $4,500,169 (Worldwide: $15,697,752)

(I don’t believe that budget. I just don’t. There is nothing in this film which suggests it needs to or did cost this much. That is absurd.)

Rotten Tomatoes – 32% (36/113): Although Hypnotic isn’t without glimmers of inspiration, the ultimate effect of this often clunky crime caper will be to leave you feeling rather sleepy.

(Yes, I 100% agree with this. The issue is that there are interesting bits and bobs, but you know you are watching bullshit and it makes you sleepy. Nailed it.)

Reviewer Highlight: The reality is that, not unlike an Escher painting, the damn thing keeps tying itself into knots. This isn’t the mesmerizing neuro-noir you want it to be. It’s closer to Inception for Dummies. – David Fear, Rolling Stone

Poster – HypNoTic

(Nolan-ing it up, are we, Rodriguez? Kind of bland. Hate the font. Unexpected D grade poster.)

Tagline(s) – Control is an illusion. (D)

(Ah well, they tried. Not clever, not interesting, not even sure it makes a huge amount of sense in context.)

Keyword(s) – Year 2023

Top 10: Oppenheimer (2023), Barbie (2023), Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 (2023), Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse (2023), John Wick: Chapter 4 (2023), Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania (2023), The Super Mario Bros. Movie (2023), Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves (2023), Mission: Impossible – Dead Reckoning Part One (2023), The Flash (2023)

Future BMT: 84.2 Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey (2023), 63.2 The Exorcist: Believer (2023), 49.8 Five Nights at Freddy’s (2023), 47.8 Insidious: The Red Door (2023), 41.6 Fool’s Paradise (2023), 37.4 My Big Fat Greek Wedding 3 (2023), 31.2 The Machine (2023), 27.9 Haunted Mansion (2023), 27.1 Love Again (2023), 18.3 Nefarious (2023), 15.6 Freelance (2023), 12.4 The Marsh King’s Daughter (2023)

BMT: Expend4bles (2023), Meg 2: The Trench (2023), 65 (2023), Retribution (2023), Hypnotic (2023), Mafia Mamma (2023), About My Father (2023)

Best Options (Action): 44.8 Hypnotic (2023), 31.2 The Machine (2023), 15.6 Freelance (2023)

(Freelance came out of nowhere. I hadn’t even heard of it. I’m a little skeptical it actually qualified. But I guess Box Office Mojo doesn’t just make up wide release films (quite the opposite actually))

Welcome to Earf (HoE Number 8) – The shortest path through The Movie Database cast lists using only BMT films is: Ben Affleck is No. 1 billed in Hypnotic and No. 1 billed in Pearl Harbor, which also stars Josh Hartnett (No. 3 billed) who is in Here on Earth (No. 3 billed) => (1 + 1) + (3 + 3) = 8. There is no shorter path at the moment.

Notes – Robert Rodriguez had written the initial screenplay for Hypnotic back in 2002, calling it one of his favorite stories.

The joke that the security guard tells his partner, about the man betting a bartender he can pee in a glass, is also featured in Robert Rodriguez’s earlier film ‘Desperado’ in which it was delivered by Quentin Tarantino.

In April 2022, Rodriguez confirmed that, similar to his previous films, he and his family members collaborated on the project. His son Rebel Rodriguez (full-time composer), Racer Max (co-writer/producer), Sid Rodriguez (special effects technician) daughter Rhiannon (storyboards) and his other son (Rocket) is doing the editing with Rodriguez.

Originally scheduled to be filmed in Los Angeles and throughout California in 2020, all locations were scouted and sets were built at Santa Clarita Studios when the Covid shutdown halted production and did not resume until the following year in Texas.

The first film directed by Robert Rodriguez to be primarily filmed in the anamorphic format. He previously used the format on The Mandalorian and The Book of Boba Fett.

Mafia Mamma Quiz

Oh man, so get this. I’m just a regular old suburban mom, and now I’m the head of a mafia family?! What happened? Like … literally what happened, I don’t remember, I’m extremely jetlagged since I traveled here from California. Do you remember what happened in Mafia Mamma?

Pop Quiz Hot Shot!

1) As is often the case, there is great change in this Mafia Mamma’s life. While everyone knows her husband cheats on her, do you remember what he does for a living?

2) But good thing she’s jetting off to Italy though. Almost immediately she has a bit of a meetcute. With whom, and how does she meet him?

3) Well, it does turn out she’s going to be a bona fide mafia mamma, whodathunkit? What is the family business?

4) First thing first though she has to meet with her rival head of family. How does she accidentally kill him?

5) In the end they yada yada yada a whole bunch of stuff. But most importantly our mafia mamma is arrested and gets off for being … a mafia mamma I guess. How does she get off?

Bonus Question: In an inter-credit scene we jump a few years in the future, and our mafia mamma is despondent. What is she missing?

Answers

Mafia Mamma Preview

Moments later Jamie and Patrick leave the family ski chalet. Clifford bids them adieu and despite his stuffy demeanor he gives both of them a warm hug. “Be good,” he tells them and reminds them of what their father said before he hopped in his helicopter. Before they can get back in their car and head to the airport Clifford stops them and insists that they take the second helicopter.

A short time later they are back in New York City, their cable knit sweaters itching like a couple of old friends. “I feel inspired,” Patrick says, contemplating the next entry in the Platonics Solids series (book #3). “Me too,” Jamie says, contemplating the next entry in his series of rock hard abs (ab #7 and #8). “Me three,” Kyle says, contemplating the final entry on Sexy Mannequin Times (entry #1,706). “You guys are coming back, right?” Kyle asks. Ever since Jamie and Patrick returned to the city he had assumed from their sunny demeanor that BMT was back on and the status quo would be restored. They give each other a look and say “Welllll…” in unison. You see, they explain to Kyle, while they were in their memory trance they had a full conversation with their father. They explained how they tried to be good movie twins, but then tried to be Good Movie Twins, then they accepted that they were bad movie twins, apologized for that, and needed his help to know if they should go back to being Bad Movie Twins. “And in the end he bestowed on us some very wise words,” Jamie concludes. Kyle is entranced, “What was it? What were the very wise words?!” Jamie shrugs and smiles, “He said to ask our mother,” and with that they departed for the airport. That’s right! We are going from About my Father to Mafia Mamma. It’s another old school comedy helmed by Toni Collette. Don’t worry if you haven’t heard of it… we barely knew what it was either. Let’s go!

Mafia Mamma (2023) – BMeTric: 36.9; Notability: 15

StreetCreditReport.com – StreetCreditReport.com – BMeTric: top 8.4%; Notability: top 12.0%; Rotten Tomatoes: top 3.8%; Higher BMeT: Expend4bles, The Exorcist: Believer, Meg 2: The Trench, Knights of the Zodiac, 65, Pet Sematary: Bloodlines, The Ritual Killer, Five Nights at Freddy’s, The Out-Laws, Insidious: The Red Door, Maybe I Do, Retribution, Hypnotic, Best. Christmas. Ever!, Heart of Stone, Fool’s Paradise, Beautiful Disaster, Your Place or Mine, Locked In, Ghosted, and 1 more; Higher Notability: Fool’s Paradise, Ghosted, Expend4bles, Haunted Mansion, Heart of Stone, The Out-Laws, Old Dads, Foe, Meg 2: The Trench, My Big Fat Greek Wedding 3, 65, Your Place or Mine, The Exorcist: Believer, About My Father, Pain Hustlers, Dashing Through the Snow, Insidious: The Red Door, One True Loves, Love Again, Genie, and 10 more; Lower RT: Freelance, The Ritual Killer, 57 Seconds, Assassin Club, Expend4bles, Fool’s Paradise, The Out-Laws, Knights of the Zodiac; Notes: Huh, the BMeTric bit was broken for a bit there, but it is back. Most of those films, naturally, are not wide release. Which is an annoying trend. The Notability is shockingly low, but that also feels like an M.O. of modern filmmaking where everything feels empty and slight.

RogerEbert.com – 1.5 stars – “Mafia Mamma” plays like nothing more than an excuse for Collette, Hardwicke, and company to vacation in Italy. But the audience isn’t even granted a trip worth remembering. Viewers searching for a virtual escape to Italy are better off sticking with Kristin’s beloved Stanley Tucci food show. At least that series aims for an authentic appreciation of the culture.

(I don’t mind just making a film for a location. But I do mind it being boring. And this film seems like a one way trip to boring town.)

Trailer – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4H5pIOz1cOM/

(Seems actually weirdly funny. But yeah, also seems like an excuse for Toni Collete to hang in Italy and get paid. Get yo money.)

Directors – Catherine Hardwicke – ( Known For: Twilight; Thirteen; Lords of Dogtown; Prisoner’s Daughter; SubUrbia; Miss You Already; Tell It Like a Woman; Plush; Future BMT: The Nativity Story; Miss Bala; BMT: Mafia Mamma; Red Riding Hood; Notes: An inspiring story, didn’t end up directing her first feature until she was 48 years old.)

Writers – Amanda Sthers – ( Known For: Madame; Promises; Holy Lands; BMT: Mafia Mamma; Notes: French, and Madame also stars Toni Collete, so they have something going.)

J. Michael Feldman – ( BMT: Mafia Mamma; Notes: Writes a lot of random episodes for television, like Not Dead Yet.)

Debbie Jhoon – ( BMT: Mafia Mamma; Notes: I think her and Feldman might be writing partners.)

Actors – Toni Collette – ( Known For: Hereditary; Knives Out; The Sixth Sense; Ruby Gillman: Teenage Kraken; Nightmare Alley; Krampus; Little Miss Sunshine; I’m Thinking of Ending Things; About a Boy; The Hours; The Way Way Back; Fright Night; The Estate; Velvet Buzzsaw; xXx: Return of Xander Cage; Emma; Velvet Goldmine; Muriel’s Wedding; Mary and Max; Stowaway; Future BMT: How to Lose Friends & Alienate People; The Night Listener; BMT: Mafia Mamma; Tammy; Evening; Notes: Nominated for an Oscar for The Sixth Sense (I don’t remember that…). She is Australian which I also didn’t know.)

Monica Bellucci – ( Known For: Bram Stoker’s Dracula; Malena; Irreversible; Spectre; The Passion of the Christ; The Matrix Reloaded; Brotherhood of the Wolf; Shoot ‘Em Up; Asterix & Obelix: Mission Cleopatra; The Apartment; How Much Do You Love Me?; The Whistleblower; Under Suspicion; The Private Lives of Pippa Lee; Don’t Look Back; Spider in the Web; The Raffle; She Hate Me; Nekrotronic; The Man Who Sold His Skin; Future BMT: The Matrix Revolutions; Tears of the Sun; The Brothers Grimm; The Sorcerer’s Apprentice; BMT: Memory; Mafia Mamma; Notes: Italian obviously. Was a model prior to making her acting debut. Was married to Vincent Cassel for quite a while.)

Sophia Nomvete – ( BMT: Mafia Mamma; Notes: Very much most notable for Rings of Power. She was a fun character in that.)

Budget/Gross – N/A / Domestic: $3,496,761 (Worldwide: $6,120,609)

(A little unclear but there is no way this made money in reality. They couldn’t have made this for less than $10 million.)

Rotten Tomatoes – 21% (22/104): Riddled with stereotypes, fatally unfunny, and a total tonal mishmash, Mafia Mamma is a criminal waste of Toni Collette.

(Fatally unfunny is a great lines and 100% true. Almost makes me more excited … what is wrong with me?)

Reviewer Highlight: “Mafia Mamma” is so wincingly awful it makes you question the professional bona fides of everyone who had a hand in greenlighting its existence. – Jeannette Catsoulis, The New York Times

Poster – Mob Mom

(I like the color and the font could have been boring, but they spiced it up. I guess it feels a little busy and stylistically simple. But not bad. B.)

Tagline(s) – From suburban mom to mafia Don. (A-)

(Yes, yes, yes. A bit of a half rhyme, but I’m still digging it. Tells you what’s going on with a little juxtaposition.)

Keyword(s) – Year 2023

Top 10: Oppenheimer (2023), Barbie (2023), Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 (2023), Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse (2023), John Wick: Chapter 4 (2023), Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania (2023), The Super Mario Bros. Movie (2023), Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves (2023), Mission: Impossible – Dead Reckoning Part One (2023), The Flash (2023)

Future BMT: 84.2 Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey (2023), 63.2 The Exorcist: Believer (2023), 49.8 Five Nights at Freddy’s (2023), 47.8 Insidious: The Red Door (2023), 44.8 Hypnotic (2023), 41.6 Fool’s Paradise (2023), 37.4 My Big Fat Greek Wedding 3 (2023), 31.2 The Machine (2023), 27.9 Haunted Mansion (2023), 27.1 Love Again (2023), 18.3 Nefarious (2023), 15.6 Freelance (2023), 12.4 The Marsh King’s Daughter (2023)

BMT: Expend4bles (2023), Meg 2: The Trench (2023), 65 (2023), Retribution (2023)

Best Options (Comedy): 41.6 Fool’s Paradise (2023), 37.4 My Big Fat Greek Wedding 3 (2023), 36.9 Mafia Mamma (2023), 31.2 The Machine (2023), 27.9 Haunted Mansion (2023), 27.1 Love Again (2023), 15.6 Freelance (2023)

(Fool’s Paradise is coming I think, and so is My Big Fat Greek Wedding 3. So we’re hitting up all the big guys as far as Comedies this year.)

Welcome to Earf (HoE Number 21) – The shortest path through The Movie Database cast lists using only BMT films is: Monica Bellucci is No. 2 billed in Mafia Mamma and No. 5 billed in Memory, which also stars Guy Pearce (No. 2 billed) who is in Justice (No. 3 billed) which also stars Nicolas Cage (No. 1 billed) who is in The Wicker Man (No. 1 billed) which also stars Leelee Sobieski (No. 6 billed) who is in Here on Earth (No. 1 billed) => (2 + 5) + (2 + 3) + (1 + 1) + (6 + 1) = 21. If we were to watch The Night Listener, Jack, and The Glass House we can get the HoE Number down to 11.

Notes – In The Godfather (1975), oranges are displayed to foreshadow a death. It happens in this movie as well during the funeral procession and later on with “orange” muffins.

The time difference between Portland and Italy allows Kristin to be speaking with her son late afternoon while he is getting ready for his morning classes.

In the preview, Dante turns on one light, then another when Kirstin says “I’m still in the dark”. In the movie, this scene is cut.